Good Morning, ,
Today is Thursday, August 17

Today I have to go to Calgary for injections into my
eyeballs. That means no newsletters on Friday, Saturday 
and Sunday. Enjoy your vacation!

>From Cajunbuckeye
Now I surely do miss your paper while¶  you are gone getting
your eyes medicated and all, but if I may suggest could you
not run reruns of your paper maybe the highest asked
question¶  of the week or month or so I am so bored when I
have to waitt till Monday to get my dose of Dear Webby 
have a great weekennd
Cajunbuckeye

Dear Cajunbuckeye
The problem is not with the writing, but with the sending.
To prevent unauthorized hackers from abusing the sending
program, it is quite tricky.

That is the reason even Ophelia's newsletters get paused for
three days. I can't delegate the sending. I tried that one
time.

With an average of $30 in donations per good month, I
definitely can't pay anybody to do that for me.

You probably have saved old ones in your archive. Just scroll
through your archive.

Have Fun!
Dearwebby

Todays Bonehead Award:
Domestic Assault Suspect Rams Patrol Car
 Bonehead
______________________________________________________
Today, Aug 17 in
1807 Robert Fulton's "North River Steam Boat" (known as the
"Clermont") began heading up New York's Hudson River on its
successful round-trip to Albany. 
See More of what happened on this 
day in history.
______________________________________________________



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______________________________________________________
Mistakes are the portals of discovery.
--- James Joyce (1882 - 1941)

We can have facts without thinking but we cannot have
thinking without facts.
--- John Dewey (1859 - 1952)
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On the border of Kentucky and Tennessee there's a small
forest.  Half of the forest belongs to a Kentucky farmer,
while the other half belongs to a Tennessee man.

One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Tennessee
man comes across a wolf caught in a trap.  He rushes back to
his house and calls his Kentucky neighbor.

"There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of
the forest."

"How do you know it's one of *our* wolves?" the Kentucky
farmer asked.

"Well," the Tennessee man replied, "he's already chewed off
three of his legs and he's still trapped."

_____________________________________________________


______________________________________________________

Anyone who's ever ridden in a cab in Washington DC knows
they're some of the world's most brazen drivers.  Oddly
enough though, their current accident rate isn't all that
bad.  I asked one of the drivers one day the reason for that.

"Easy," he said.  "all the really bad drivers are dead now."

______________________________________________________




Mt Tamalpais By Michael Hayashi
_____________________________________________________


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______________________________________________________


An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD
has been earned by

Daniel Gaines,
35,
Camdenton,
Mo

Domestic Assault Suspect Rams Patrol Car

 A man from Camdenton is jailed after he allegedly assaulted
his wife and rammed a deputy patrol car while attempting to
evade authorities.

35-year-old Daniel Gaines is accused of hitting his wife in
the face and choking her on Monday night. Deputies got a 911
call at 10:20 p.m. Monday about the domestic disturbance off
Hidden Drive in Camdenton but Gaines had left the scene
before police arrived.

Deputies located the man near Highway 54 and the North
Highway 5 exit, according to a press release.

Deputies with the Camden County Sheriff's Department briefly
stopped Gaines' red 2010 F-150 truck around 11:53 p.m. before
he sped off quickly.

One deputy attempted to pass Gaines during the chase. Gaines
rammed the patrol car numerous times on the dry gap bridge
prior to the Niangua Bridge, eventually disabling the patrol
vehicle. He then continued driving towards his home, through
a ditch which eventually brought the chase to an end.

Gaines then began to, as the press release states,
"advance(d) on the deputies at which time a deputy's taser
was deployed."

He was taken into custody and charged with first-degree
assault, domestic assault, property damage, resisting arrest,
and misdemeanor possession of marijuana.

Gaines is being held without bond in Camden County Jail.

_________________________________

Tech Support Pits
From: Nadia
Re: Voice message email
Dear Webby,
I keep getting these emails with
"Click attachment to listen to Voice Message"
supposedly an attachment from some number, name unavailable.

Somehow I have a hunch that it probably is not safe to click
on that, and besides, I don't like being told to do something
by somebody I don't know.

What's the story?
Nadia

Dear Nadia
Just dump it. If you had 
MailWasher, 
it would have dumped it for you. That is malware from the
"Bad Shit" category, to use kind and diplomatic language.

You can even make a filter. If mail is FROM 
vm@(yourdomain.com)
then delete it, 
automatically, without even showing it in the list.

After that, you will never see that crap again.

Have FUN!
DearWebby




From Ireland
OFFICE MEMO
 Please note that at this year's company party there will be
 only one cup of booze per person.
      Please bring your own cup.





If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!




Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com
Bread Crumbs 
Save leftover bread in a bag in your freezer. Bagels,
baguettes, biscuits, crackers, rolls, sandwich bread all
work well. When the bag gets full or you need some bread
crumbs, process the bread into very fine crumbs in your
food processor or blender. Then store the leftover crumbs
in the freezer.
Tip provided by http://www.ThriftyFun.com
If you want gourmet crumbs (coarser, and from mostly crust)
make bread sticks from any left over bread dough, let them
dry a few days and then smash them to crumbs in a gallon
jar by hitting them with a piece of wood. The difference in
taste is well worth the effort!
DearWebby

____________________________________________________




 Drawing mendhi on legs 
____________________________________________________

>From Mona:
I was teaching my 6-year-old daughter how to unbuckle her
seat belt. She asked, "Do I click the square?" I said yes.

She asked me, "Single click or double click?"
___________________________________________________


 
 
Amazing places on our planet.
2017. 
___________________________________________________

>From Belinda
Looking in the mall for a nightgown, I tried my luck in a
store known for its sexy lingerie. To my delight, however,
I found just what I was looking for. Waiting in the line
to pay, I noticed a young woman behind me holding the same
item. This confirmed what I suspected all along: despite
being over 50, I still have a very "with it" attitude.

"I see we have the same taste," I said proudly to the 20-
something behind me.

"Yes," she replied. "I'm getting this for my grandmother."



Ophelia Dingbatter's
NewsNo sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes
and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you
subscribe, look for the double opt-in confirmation request.

____________________________________________________

At the construction site of a new church, the contractor
stopped to chat with one of his workmen.

"Patty," he asked casually, "didn't you once tell me that
you had a brother who was a bishop?"

"That I did."

"And you are a bricklayer! It sure is a funny world. Things
in life aren't divided equally, are they?"

"No, that they ain't," agreed Patty, as he proudly slapped
the mortar along the line of bricks. "My poor brother
is such a klutz, he couldn't do this to save his life!"
____________________________________________________




Today, August 17, in 
1790 The capital city of the U.S. moved to Philadelphia from
New York City. 

1807 Robert Fulton's "North River Steam Boat" (known as the
"Clermont") began heading up New York's Hudson River on its
successful round-trip to Albany. 

1815 Napoleon began serving his exile when he arrived at the
island of St. Helena. 

1859 A hot air balloon was used to carry mail for the first
time. John Wise left Lafayette, IN, for New York City with
100 letters. He had to land after only 27 miles. 

1863 Federal batteries and ships cannons bombarded Fort
Sumter in Charleston, SC, harbor during the Civil War. 

1896 The Klondike gold rush was set off by George Carmack
discovering gold on Rabbit Creek in the Yukon. 

1903 Joseph Pulitzer donated a million dollars to Columbia
University. This started the Pulitzer Prizes in his name. 

1915 Charles F. Kettering received a patent for the first
electric ignition device. 

1943 The Allied conquest of Sicily was completed as U.S. and
British forces entered Messina. 

1945 The nationalists of Indonesia declared their
independence from the Netherlands. 

1961 The Communist East German government completed the
construction of the Berlin Wall. 

1977 Florists Transworld Delivery (FTD) reported that in one
day the number of orders for flowers to be delivered to
Graceland had surpassed the number for any other event in the
company's history. 

1978 Maxie Anderson, Ben Abruzzo and Larry Newman became the
first to land after a successful trans-Atlantic balloon
flight. The voyage began in Presque Isle, ME and ended in
Miserey, France. 

1982 The U.S. Senate approved an immigration bill that
granted permanent resident status to illegal aliens who had
arrived in the United States before 1977. 

1985 A year-long strike began when 1,400 Geo. A. Hormel and
Co. meat packers walked off the job. 

1992 Woody Allen admitted to being romantically involved with
Soon-Yi Previn. The girl was the adopted daughter of Mia
Farrow, Allen's longtime companion. 

1996 A military cargo plane crashed in Wyoming killing eight
crew members and a Secret Service employee. The plane was
carrying gear for U.S. President Clinton. 

1996 Ross Perot was announced to be the Reform Party's
presidential candidate. It was the party's first-ever
candidate. 

1998 U.S. President Clinton admitted to having an improper
relationship with Monica Lewinsky, a White House intern. 

1998 NationsBank and BankAmerica merge to create the largest
U.S. bank. 

1998 Russia devalued the ruble. 

2002 In Santa Rosa, CA, the Charles M. Schulz Museum opened
to the public. 

2017  smiled.
 
 

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Well, , that's all for today.

Have FUN !
Dear Webby from Webby.com
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