Dear Webby:  

Good Morning,  Text-Start !
Saturday,  December 1, 2006
======================================


 "Enthusiasm is that secret and harmonious spirit 
 which hovers over the production of genius."   
 Isaac Disraeli  


======================================
Text-Start, if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: 
 Thanks for your votes!
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A out-of-towner in New York at the height of the tourist
season decided to revisit an uptown restaurant he'd enjoyed
on a previous trip to the city.


Finally catching the eye of an overworked waiter, he said,
"You know, it's been over five years since I first came in
here."


"I'm sorry, but you'll have to wait your turn, sir," replied
the waiter with typical New York charm. "I can only serve
one table at a time."


===========================================


  A "Sniveling Ninnie" award goes to
   Bellsouth.net for censoring mail
   Yahoo for losing mail
   Hotmail.com for losing mail
   MSN for losing mail
   Shaw.ca for losing mail




Currently Google's gmail is by far the most reliable of all
the free email services, and better than most of the paid
for services. I highly recommend Google's gmail!
DearWebby

If you want to read previous day's Humor Letters, browse to the blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog
=========================================== A poor vagabond, traveling a country road in England, tired and hungry, came to a roadside Inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon." He knocked. The Innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a window. "Could ye spare some victuals?" he asked. The woman glanced at his shabby clothes and obviously poor condition. "No!" she said rather sternly. "Could I have a pint of ale?" "No!" she said again. "Could I at least sleep in your stable?" "No!" by this time she was fairly shouting. The vagabond said, "Might I please...?" "What now?" the woman interrupted impatiently. "D'ye suppose," he asked, "I might have a word with George?" ===========================================
Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter
===========================================
Need some unique Christmas cards in a hurry? There is a great selection at Hicards
=========================================== Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Martin Luther Jackson, 31, of Decatur December 1, 2006 - Conyers, Georgia - CBS News A man has been arrested after allegedly trying to force his estranged wife into an oven on Thanksgiving in front of their five children. Martin Luther Jackson, 31, of Decatur, has been charged with aggravated assault, aggravated battery, cruelty to children and possession of marijuana after the Nov. 23 incident, said Sgt. Jodi Shupe of the Rockdale County Sheriff's Office. Jackson and his 29-year-old wife, who have been separated since July, have five children ranging in age from 1 to 13 years old, Shupe said. Jackson apparently started fighting with his wife after she and the children returned to their Conyers home on Thanksgiving. At one point during the fight, Jackson allegedly attempted to stuff his wife inside the kitchen oven, which had been left on to heat the house, Shupe said. The woman escaped and went to the sheriff's office with visible head injuries, Shupe said. Investigators found Jackson hiding under a bed at his mother's house in Decatur, where he had been living since the separation, Shupe said. =========================================== A bonehead award also goes to Westin Hotels, who have decided it is more profitable not to allow the dumb suckers, who accidentally booked into their facilities because of seminars or courses, to allow smoking privileges anywhere in their building. They are not interested in customer service or in what their customers want. They never come back a second time anyway. =========================================== Thanks to Deeli for this picture:. =========================================== The orthopedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping transport many of the items. I sat the display skeleton in the front of my car, his bony arm across the back of my seat. I hadn't considered the drive across town. At one traffic light, the stares of the people in the car beside me became obvious, and I looked across and explained, "I'm delivering him to my doctor's office." The other driver leaned out of his window. "I hate to tell you, lady," he said, "but I think it's too late!" ============================================ Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! http://www.AFreeDish.com ================================== From the Tech Support Pits: From: Ron Re: Transfer files to XP machine Hi Webby I have gotten help from you before and it is always good. Now I just bought a new computer W/ XP and need to transfer many old pics. and music and some data. Can I just burn data cd"s with all the stuff that I want to transfer and then put that info. in the new computer? I have not yet put the new computer in use and am waiting to see if this will work. Thanks for the timely info I just bought it yesterday and today I finally got to the e-mail.. Thanks again. Ron Dear Ron Yes, that will definitely work fine. Have FUN! DearWebby. ========================================== Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! http://www.Ask4Ink.com ========================================== Deeli's Kudos November 30, 2006 - Centralia, Washington - AP Esther Medley of Centralia is legally blind, but when she bowls she can glimpse a bit of the floor to line up with the lane. Medley, 94, can't see straight ahead, so her 86-year-old husband Ralph tells her which pins are left after her first ball. That's how Medley recently bowled a score of 244, which included eight strikes, at Fairway Lanes in Centralia. It was the second-highest score of the year for her league. The Medleys have been bowling in the senior league since 1979.
============================================= The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at http://fire-cat.com/blog/ http://fire-cat.com/blog/ You can post your questions there and read current and past queries and replies, or email to the Express Empress at empress@fire-cat.com, and she will post it into the blog for you. =============================================
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Daily tips will return on Sunday
Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun http://www.thriftyfun.com/subscribe.ldml Subscribe and get access to their new -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Holiday Craft Projects everyday at ThriftyFun! -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly contests! Contest If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here: http://www.cumuli.com/ezines/vote.html?pub_code=dailtt ========================================
An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you ever been arrested?" he wrote, "No." The next question, intended for people who had answered in the affirmative to the previous question, was "Why?" The applicant answered it anyway: "Never got caught." ======================================== To find a real bugler for military funerals, browse to Buglers Pervert Alerts are now at http://posty.net/pervertalerts/ ======================================== At 3 am a desk clerk at a hotel gets a call from a drunk guy asking what time the bar opens. "It opens at noon," answers the clerk. About an hour later he gets a call from the same guy, sounding even drunker. "What time does the bar open?" He asks. "Same time as before... Noon," Replies the clerk. Another hour passes and he calls again, plastered. "Whatjoo shay the bar opins at?" The clerk then answers, "It opens at noon, but if you can't wait, I can have room service send something up to you." "No... I don't wanna git in... Ah wanna git OUT!!!"
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog You can enter comments in the blog!
========================================
Thanks to Dianne for this Bonus Link: Truk Lagoon http://snipurl.com/13wc0
======================================== Text-Start, if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Give a free gift subscription to a friend! ======================================== Well, Text-Start, that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby





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