Dear Webby: Restore Pop-Up Blocker 

Good Morning,   !
Saturday,  May 5, 2007

As a city prosecutor said during closing arguments that
Paris Hilton deserved jail time, Hilton's mother, Kathy,
laughed. When the judge ruled and sentenced paris Hilton
to ordinary jail time, no soft $87 a day VIP jail, but regular
county jail like any common crook, Kathy Hilton then blurted
out: "May I have your autograph?"

I bet that made THAT judges day!


Two country doctors out in the hills of West
Virginia were discussing the population
explosion in the world.

One physician says, "Why, Bubba, thiseyer
crazy birth thang isa gettin' so bad that
perty soon, they ain't gonna be room for
ever'body! There'sa gonna be standin' room
only on this here planet!"

The other doctor replied, "Heck, that sure
oughta slow 'em down a bit!"


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The other day, during a service call, I was in a house that
seemed to have more than it's share of cats and birds.
At one time I counted a total of 30 eyes and 44 feet.

Assuming that all birds had 2 eyes and 2 feet, and all cats
had 2 eyes and 4 feet, how many cats and birds did I count ?


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=========================================== Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Vassil Ivanov, 37, from Stara Zagora, Bulgaria Not ready for responsibility April 30, 2007 - Stara Zagora, Bulgaria - Ananova An escaped convict turned up at his old prison and asked to be let back in because he was missing his mates. Bulgarian thief Vassil Ivanov, 37, had been on the run since disappearing during an Easter break at home in 2005. He said: "I couldn't stand it any more. I had been inside for nine years and I just couldn't get used to life on the outside again. I missed my pals here and I was miserable being a free man." Wardens at the Stara Zagora prison in Bulgaria immediately took Ivanov back into the prison where he will serve the remaining two years of his 11 year sentence, and is likely to serve extra time for escaping. ===========================================
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=========================================== Thanks to Kevin for this picture: My son and his dog checking out the goldfish in the pondů Kevin =========================================== If a barber makes a mistake, It's a new style... If a driver makes a mistake, It is an accident... If a engineer makes a mistake, It is a new venture... If parents makes a mistake, It is a new generation... If a politician makes a mistake, It is a new law... If a scientist makes a mistake, It is a new invention... If a tailor makes a mistake, It is a new fashion... If a teacher makes a mistake , It is a new theory... If our boss makes a mistake, It is our mistake...... If an employee makes a mistake, It is a "@#$# SCREWUP!" ===========================================
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=========================================== John was grocery shopping with Jill, and he tossed a bag of chips into the cart. "You don't need those!" Jill chided. "What about those twenty chocolate bars you have in there?" John asked. "IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH!" scremed Jill. "Oh, OK. Are you sure twenty will be enough?" asked John. =========================================== Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! ================================== From the Tech Support Pits: From: Tammy Re: Pop Up Blocker Dear Webby Hi there, once again I want to thank you for the humor daily, its a highlight of my lunch hour at work.... now I need to ask a question, I turned off my pop up blocker so I could fill out a online application, now I get pop ups and can't figure out how to turn the blocker back on. Please help, thanks so much, Tammy Dear Tammy Click on TOOLS Intenet Options Privacy and there it is at the bottom. You can bypass the PopUp Blocker by holding down the CTRL key when you click on a link. Have FUN! DearWebby ========================================== Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! ========================================== Deeli's Kudos May 2, 2007 - College Station, Texas - AP Texas A&M University scientists showed off to state and federal officials Tuesday a genetically engineered crop of sorghum they believe will be a more efficient and economical option to corn in drier parts of the country as the nation pushes for alternative energy sources. Sorghum, which as a plant resembles stalks of corn, is a centuries-old grain common around the world but used more in the United States as a lovestock feed. At Texas A&M, researchers have been working over the past several years to extend its growing season, allowing it to double its height to more than 15 feet, thicken its stalk and be even more drought tolerant. The genetic changes make it ideal to raise in the South and Southeast where the growing season already is longer than in northern sections of the country. The climate also makes it more suitable than growing corn, which has emerged as a biofuel alternative used in ethanol production, particularly in the Midwest. The cellulose from one version of the sorghum and sugar from another version similarly can be processed for fuel. Researchers said energy yields could top those from corn and at a more reasonable cost, making it an economic windfall for farmers.
============================================= The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at You can email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you. =============================================
Daily tip from Jars for Drinking Glasses After pricing drinking glasses in the store, I bought a case of a dozen pint canning jars for about 1/3 the cost. I enjoy the "country" look, and can use the jars next fall to can. You can sometimes find these at garage sales. By Sandra
Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly contests! Contest If you like the list, you can vote for it here: ========================================
Three ministers a Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Southern Baptist and their wives were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship. They all drowned, and next thing you know, they're standing before St. Peter. First in line was the Presbyterian and his wife. St. Peter shook his head sadly and said, "I can't let you in. You were moral and upright, but you loved money too much. You loved it so much, you even married a woman named Penny." St. Peter waved sadly, and poof! Down the chute to the 'Other Place' they went. Then came the Methodist. "Sorry, can't let you in either," said Saint Peter. "You abstained from liquor and dancing and cards, but you loved food too much. You loved food so much, you even married a woman named Candy!" Sadly, St. Peter waved again, and whang! Down the chute went the Methodists. The Southern Baptist turned to his wife and whispered nervously, "It doesn't look good, Fanny." =============================================
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
======================================== Thanks to BP for this one: My grandfather came to America to gain freedom, but it didn't work. My grandmother came over on the very next boat. ========================================
Thanks to Dorothy for this Bonus Link: Naure Screens
======================================== , if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Give a free gift subscription to a friend! ======================================== Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby PS. There were 7 cats and 8 birds

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