Dear Webby: Remove OE 

Good Morning,   !
Wednesday,  May 9, 2007

"You can never tell what type of impact you may make on
anotherís life by your actions or lack of action. Sometimes
just with a smile on the street to a passing stranger can
make a difference we could never imagine."
ó Ed Foreman

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope
that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could
say, "I used everything you gave me."
--- Erma Bombeck


A recent study was made to find out what days men prefer
to have intimate relations with their wives. It was found
that most men preferred to engage in these matrimonial
activities on the days that started with "T."
 Examples of those days are:
 Thaturday and Thunday!


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An elderly man was quite unhappy because he had lost his
favorite hat.

Instead of buying a new one, he decided he would go to
church and steal one out of the vestibule.

When he got there, an usher intercepted him at the door
and took him to a pew where he had to sit and listen to
the entire sermon on "The Ten Commandments."

After church, the man met the preacher in the vestibule
doorway, shook his hand vigorously, and told him "I want
to thank you preacher for saving my soul today. I came to
church to steal a hat and after hearing your sermon on
the 10 Commandments, I decided against it."

Preacher: "You mean the commandment 'I shall not steal'
changed your mind?"

Old Man: "No, the one about adultery did. As soon as you
said that I remember where I left my hat!"


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=========================================== Re yesterday's Bonehead Award: Apparently the missing pants had been found the next day, two years ago, but judge Roy Pearson still wants to go ahead with the $67 million lawsuit. Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Eugenio Anthony Colon from Chehalis, Washington Dumb place for a stash! May 3, 2007 - Chehalis, Washington - AP A 35-year-old Onalaska man picked the wrong place and the wrong time to hide a container with marijuana in it. Lewis County sheriff's detectives in Chehalis say they arrested Eugenio Anthony Colon today at 11:25 a.m. after he was seen by detectives hiding the container under a bush in front of their office window. Colon was charged with possession of marijuana under 40 grams. He was arriving at the Lewis County Courthouse for a court matter. Much to his surprise, he was confronted by detectives in the courtroom while he was waiting his court appearance. Colon admitted to hiding the marijuana and told detectives he had no idea he could be seen by them. ===========================================
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=========================================== Thanks to Joan for sending this picture by her shy friend in Florence, Oregon: Columbine =========================================== A lady picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally got up to the checker, she learned that one of her items had no price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear: PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN, TAMPAX, SUPER SIZE. That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the store apparently misunderstood the word Tampax for THUMBTACKS. In a business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom. DO YOU WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A HAMMER? ===========================================
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=========================================== How many members of your sign does it take to change a light bulb? ARIES: Just one. You want to make something of it? TAURUS: One, but just try to convince them that the burned- out bulb is useless and should be thrown away. GEMINI: Two, but the job never gets done -- they just keep discussing who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done! CANCER: Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grieving process. LEO: Leos don't change light bulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a Virgo in to do the job for them while they're out. VIRGO: Approximately 1.000000 with an error of +/- one millionth. LIBRA: Er, two. Or maybe one. No, on second thought, make that two. Is that okay with you? SCORPIO: That information is strictly secret and shared only with the Enlightened Ones in the Star Chamber of the Ancient Hierarchical Order. SAGITTARIUS: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned-out light bulb? CAPRICORN: I don't waste my time with these childish jokes. AQUARIUS: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy, so.... PISCES: Light bulb? What light bulb? =========================================== Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! ================================== From the Tech Support Pits: From: Patti Re: Getting rid of OE Dear Webby "Control Panel/Add/Remove" - and there in lies my problem. There is no Outlook Depress listed - yet, when I go to a website, say Sears, and try to contact them, the email automatically starts in the blasted OD program. Then I have to copy Sears address and paste in the email program I do use. Having fun, until OD pops up, Patti Dear Patti I can't look it up on my machine, because here getting rid of OD is a to be checkmarked part of the set-up routine. All machines here are clean. Have a look at C:\Program Files I have an empty Outlook Express folder there. Most likely I dumped the contents on Setup Day. Microsoft requires all programs written by anybody else to jump through a certain number of hoops before they are allowed to put the Windows flag on the box and claim that they are Windows compatible. One of those hoops is a clean un-install via "Control Panel/Add/Remove". In typical Microsoft fashion, that hoop does not apply for some of their own stuff. However, I found a secret back door for dumping OE: To remove Outlook Express 6.0 from Windows XP: a. Click Start, click Run, type appwiz.cpl, and then click OK. b. In Add or Remove Programs, click Add/Remove Windows Components. c. In the Components list, click to clear the Outlook Express check box, and then click Next. Outlook Express will be removed from the computer. Hope that will work! If it doesn't, clean out the OE folder in C:\Program Files What are you using for your mail program? Have FUN! DearWebby ========================================== Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! ========================================== Deeli's Kudos May 6, 2007 - Naperville, Illinois - AP This new taxi service doesn't come cheap, but it may be a bargain compared with the price of a drunk-driving arrest. Smith Cos. plans to launch a towing taxi service this week in Naperville, a suburb of Chicago. It will allow intoxicated drinkers to call for a ride home in a tow truck that will also haul their cars. For an unscheduled pickup, the fee will be $85, plus $2 per mile, or 1.6 kilometres. If someone has a hunch that they are going to over-indulge, reservations are available for $65, plus the towing fee. Smith vice-president Frank Sheppard says he believes the service is unique. "There are a lot of businessmen and women, and we feel it's the best place, suburb-wise, to do this," he said.
============================================= The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at You can email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you. =============================================
Daily tip from Baking Soda and Dawn For Clothing Stains A great way to remove clothing stains is to mix baking soda and dish soap (Dawn) into a paste. Brush it into the stain and let sit, depending on the severity of stain. Leave the paste in and wash clothes as usual, works great. By Shirley
Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly contests! Contest If you like the list, you can vote for it here: ========================================
Women should not have children after 35. Really...35 children are quite enough =============================================
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
======================================== A woman in our diet club was lamenting that she had gained weight. She'd made her family's favorite cake over the weekend, she reported, and they'd eaten half of it at dinner. Her husband teased her and said she would never be able to stay away from the other half until dinner the next night. The next day, she said, she kept staring at the other half, until finally she cut a thin slice for herself. One slice led to another, and soon the whole cake was gone. The woman went on to tell us how upset she was with her lack of willpower, and how she knew her husband would rub it in. Everyone commiserated, until someone asked what her husband said when he found out. She smiled. "He never found out. I made another cake and ate half!" ========================================
Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link:: Old Pictures
======================================== , if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Give a free gift subscription to a friend! ======================================== Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby

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