Dear Webby: Wired or wireless? 

Good Morning,   !
Saturday,  June 23, 2007

"Love does not consist in gazing at each other but
in looking outward together in the same direction."
- Antoine de Saint Exupery

"Love doesn't make the world go 'round.
Love is what makes the ride worthwhile."
- Franklin P. Jones

"Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
- Chinese Proverb


Thanks to Martin for bringing back this classic:
Shakey went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got
trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's
somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there's
somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under ... you
gotta help me, I'm going crazy!"
"Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the
"Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your
"How much do you charge?"
"A hundred dollars per visit."
"I'll sleep on it," said Shakey.
Six months later the doctor met Shakey on the street.
"Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked
the psychiatrist.
"For a hundred buck's a visit? A bartender cured me
for ten dollars."
"Is that so! How?"
"He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"


, if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
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 Thanks for your votes!


On a Cathay Pacific 747 in Taipei, the following
announcement was heard over the cabin PA system:
"Ladies and gentlemen, we are overbooked and are
offering anyone $1,000 plus a seat on the next flight in
exchange for their seat on this flight."

After a short pause, the offer was repeated with the
amendment that it did not apply to the crew assigned
to the flight.


Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter
=========================================== Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to a 16 year old bozo in berlin, Germany Violence is no substitute for homework June 18, 2007 - Berlin, Germany - Reuters A 16-year-old Berlin student was so worried he would have to repeat a year at school because of poor marks he convinced two friends to storm his class and steal the report cards with his bad grades. "The student probably honestly believed that he could avoid repeating the school year if he made the report cards disappear," said a spokesman for local police Monday. The youth sat quietly at the back of the classroom as the two masked robbers, aged 14 and 15, burst in and threatened his teacher with a steel bar if she did not hand over the reports. After grabbing them, the two tried to flee but dropped the reports as other students leapt to defend the teacher. The two were arrested close to the school, and told police their friend had devised the raid because he was afraid of flunking a year. Police would not reveal what incentives the youth had offered the pair to carry out the robbery, adding the youths faced legal consequences once investigations were over. ... student_dc ===========================================
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=========================================== Thanks to Dianne for this picture: =========================================== A little boy was roughhousing with his dog. His mother said to him, "Now, Peter, I know you love Wowser, but you're loving him too much. How would you feel if someone huge picked you up and squeezed you so hard you couldn't breathe?" The boy thought a moment and then said, "I guess I'd feel like it was my birthday and Aunt Doreen was here!..." =========================================== Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! ================================== From the Tech Support Pits: From: Kim Re: Wired or wireless keyboard and mouse Dear Webby, What is better, a wired keyboard and mouse, or a wireless combo? Kim Dear Kim That depends on your priorites. If you are a neat freak and the sight of the cables causes you trauma and bad dreams, then spend the extra money on a wireless combo. If faster performance and never having to pause to change batteries, is more important, then go for the old fashioned wired keyboard and mouse. Some manufacturers claim that their wireless combos are fast enough. That may be true for SOME users, but is not true when working at my speed. I also find it very disruptive, having to stop at the most inopportune times, to change the silly batteries. Have FUN! DearWebby ========================================== Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! ========================================== Deeli's Kudos June 9, 2007 - Ananova Cat owners can now see what their pet gets up to once they go through the flap. It follows the launch of 'cat cam' by a German inventor, reports the Daily Mail. Jürgen Perthold, who lives in America, attached his light-weight camera to the collar of his tom cat Mr Lee. "I wanted to find out what he gets up to, where he spends his days," Mr Perthold said. "He goes out the whole day, sometimes he returns hungry sometimes not, sometimes with traces of fights, sometimes he also says out all night. It gave me the idea to equip the cat with a camera." The camera takes one photo a minute for 48 hours and has revealed that the chubby tabby has the hots for a neighbouring feline, although he is in contention with another black tom. Mr Lee spends much of his time exploring the undergrowth, looking longingly up at bird feeders and meeting other moggies under parked cars. The camera weighs 70 grams including the batteries and Mr Perthold said it didn't give his cat any problems. He wrote his own software to control the camera and perfected the design. He is now selling his invention for $30 in the US.
============================================= The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at You can email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you. =============================================
Daily tip from Alcohol Bug Spray For House Plants Mix together one cup rubbing alcohol (70% isopropyl) with one cup water in a spray bottle. Spray this solution directly on the pests. Avoid spraying onto more foliage than necessary. You don't need to spray much, brief contact with alcohol will kill most insects. Dish water does in the rest of them. If you want to use a sprayer, use a coffee filter to filter used dishwater straight into your sprayer bottle. Have Fun! DearWebby
Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly contests! Contest If you like the list, you can vote for it here: ========================================
For best results, read this one out loud! "Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company." "Would you spell that, please?" "Certainly. C as in sea. A as in aye. S as in sea. E as in eye. W as in why. A as in are. Y as in you." The operator pauses. "Just a minute, sir. I'll connect you with my supervisor . . ." ============================================= CRITTER TONGUE TWISTERS! People who love critters can find so many crazy ways to amuse themselves. I was at a house party where someone started hollered out, "Can you say these, repeatedly and fast?" This is a fun challenge for you. Don't be shy, go ahead and try. I guarantee it will give your sense of humour a good work out. * Sixty-six sick chicks, "Careful with this one!" *I'm not the pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's son and I'm only plucking pheasants till the pheasant plucker comes. *As one eager eagle eased under the eaves the other eager eagle eased out. * A big black bug bit a big black bear, made a big black bear bleed blood. Stormy O' =============================================
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
======================================== A few nights ago a few friends and I were in a bar, telling all the Taliban jokes we knew. After a while I ducked into the restroom to sprinkle the old porcelain. While I was in there, this big guy came in and said to me, "Hey you! I'm Afghan and I don't like you telling all those Afghani jokes!" So I said, "Well, they're not against you, pal, just against Talibans." "My mother is in Afghanistan!" He screams, and pulls out a razor. For a moment there I was quite concerned. I wasn't sure what he would have done, if he had found a place to plug it in!!! ========================================
Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Florida Wildlife
======================================== , if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Give a free gift subscription to a friend! ======================================== Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby

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