Dear Webby: POST beep codes 

Good Morning,   !
Sunday,  July 22, 2007

If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed,
if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
--- Mark Twain


The American tourist stood staring at the highland sentry
standing guard outside Edinburgh Castle.

After a few minutes she went up to the sentry and asked
'I've always wanted to find out what's worn under the kilt'.

The sentry replied: 'There is nothing worn, Ma'am. It's all
in perfect working order.'


Little Johnny turns up in his classroom one morning to be
confronted by his teacher.

Teacher: "Morning Johnny, and why weren't you at school

Johnny: "Well Miss, my Grandad got burnt."

Teacher: "Oh Dear, he wasn't too badly hurt I hope?"

Johnny: "Nothing left but ashes, Ma'am.
They don't mess around at those crematoriums."


, if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: 
 Thanks for your votes!


There was a married couple who were in a terrible accident.
The woman's face was burned severely. The doctor told the
husband they couldn't graft any skin from her body because
she was so skinny.  The husband then donated some of his
skin...however, the only place suitable to the doctor was from
his buttocks. The husband requested that no one be told of
this, because after all,... this was a very delicate matter!

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded
at the woman's new beauty.  She looked more beautiful than
she ever did before!  All her friends and relatives just ranted
and raved at her youthful beauty!

She was alone with her husband one day & she wanted to
thank him for what he did.

She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you
did for me! There is no way I could ever repay you!!!

He replied, "Oh don't worry, Honey, I get thanks enough
every time your mother comes over and kisses you on your


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=========================================== Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Michelle Rendino, 20, of Syracuse, New York Wrong Priorities July 19, 2007 - Syracuse, New York - AP A 20-year-old Syracuse woman who left children who were in her care alone to go pose for nude photos is facing several charges of endangering the welfare of a child. Police say Michelle Rendino was supposed to be watching four young girls yesterday when she left them alone and went into the woods near Syracuse's Inner Harbor to have a man take nude photos of her. A man fishing saw the children crying and called police. When police arrived, the oldest girl - a six-year-old - told police that "Aunt Michelle" went into the woods to take "nasty pictures." Rendino says she asked the man to take nude photos of her so she could get back at her ex-boyfriend. The children were returned safely to their mother. ... 1415c.html ===========================================
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=========================================== =========================================== After a young couple brought their new baby home, the wife suggested that her husband should try his hand at changing diapers. "I'm busy," he said, "I'll do the next one." The next time came around and she asked again. The husband looked puzzled, "Oh! I didn't mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby!" =========================================== Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! ================================== From the Tech Support Pits: From: Eddie Re: POST beep decoder Hi Mr Webby; Can you please tell me if this card is worth buying? Eddie POST PROBE PCI CARD POST Code Reader Card from Micro 2000 Dear Eddie That's just an old-fashioned POST (Power On Self Test) beep decoder. In the days when components were still repaired, some people used the beep decoders. For example, with an IBM 3270, (before the PC), 3 long beeps signalled keyboard problems, usually a stuck key. "Hmmm, sounds like you have been eating at your desk again!" Turning the keyboard upside down and whacking it on the desk usually fixed that problem. A long and a two short beeps indicated problems with the CGA video card on early IBM PC's and Canon XT's. Usually that problem was due to the video card creeping part way out of it's slot from heating and cooling. That called for "Percussive Maintenance". Lift the computer 10 inches and drop it onto the desk. "There, Ma'am. Should work fine now. Call me when it does it again." And so on. In those days, a good troubleshooter had all the POST code beeps memorized. Since then, things have gotten a bit simpler. Nowadays you see the post code numbers on the screen, or get 4 beeps, if there is a problem with the video card. If re-seating all the cards and memory doesn't help, and the "power-good" LED on the motherboard is lit up, you just start pulling and/or exchanging cards until you got the one that was causing the problem. If that doesn't help, replace the motherboard. If the problem is the power supply, you can tell by the sound of the power supply fan, or lack thereof. You can read about the POST beep codes at however, that beep decoder is more of a nostalgia item than a modern troubleshooter's tool. Have FUN! DearWebby ========================================== Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! ========================================== Deeli's Kudos July 20, 2007 - Newcastle, Delaware - Gimundo When Ameerah Pearman was a teenager, she was diagnosed with Stage 4 Hodgkin’s disease, a form of cancer that affects the lymph nodes. She survived, but doctors told her she’d probably be unable to have children. Ameera, now 25, lost four other babies before birth, but a few months ago, she delivered her first child, Michael, who arrived four months premature. After 81 days in the hospital, Michael got to go home with his mother to their New Castle, Del., home. Ameerah said she never stopped believing she could have a family. “Statistics are just numbers, and God is the final doctor. He’s the physician that I listen to,” she said. ... iracle_Mom
============================================= The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at You can email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you. =============================================
Daily tip from Cleaning Glass Doors On Wood Furniture If you have a nice piece of furniture with glass windows surrounded by wood, don't spray glass cleaner directly on the windows. Some of the cleaner is bound to get on the wood and can damage the finish. Dampen a rag with glass cleaner and then wipe the window clean with the rag.
Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly contests! Contest If you like the list, you can vote for it here: ========================================
The customer in the Italian restaurant was so pleased that he asked to speak to the chef. The owner proudly led him into the kitchen and introduced him to the chef. "Your veal parmigiana was superb," the customer said. "I just spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I ever had over there." "Naturally," the chef said. "Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported." ============================================= LUCKY DOG - POOR ME When most people see an animal in danger, they will usually help. I'm no exception. I was in a parking lot on a boiling hot day. I noticed a large dog, sleeping, curled up in the shade of a parked car right behind the rear tires. The owner of the vehicle came out, got in, started up, then began to back up. I made a dash to snatch the dog out from behind the wheels. The dog was sound asleep, not pleased that a strange woman was suddenly yanking him around. The dog struggled, peed all over my new jeans, tried to bite me, and in the moment, I left one of my dainty little feet under the wheel, where the car ran over it. I let out a blood curdling scream. The car stopped, the driver jumped out very concerned that he had run over the poor dog. I'm hollering my head off, the dog has emptied his bladder on me, plus dished out a nasty bite, my foot is squished, and this guy is worried about the dog? I finally got it through to him that I was the hurt one. I let the dog go. It was desperate to get away from the screeching person hanging onto its tail with a death grip. X-rays showed no broken bones. I went home. My artist friend was amazed at how many colors a mashed foot can have. Purple, black, blues, even orange. I was not amused with her at all. The best part, a nice dog didn't get run over. The very worst, I had a date lined up to go dancing with a male of my liking. I had to phone him and tell him, "I have a foot-ache, not tonight honey." Stormy O' =============================================
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
======================================== A sailor gets off his ship in New York late one night, hails a taxi and asks to be taken to 42nd Street. Along the way, he suddenly realizes that he doesn't have any money. Well-trained to be resourceful, and familiar with cabs in New York, of course, he tells the driver, "Stop," and he jumps out of the cab. "I'm just going to run over here to the drugstore to get some matches," he says. "I dropped a $100 bill somewhere back here and I can't find it in the dark." The sailor goes into the drugstore, and as soon as he's through the door, the taxi speeds off into the night -- just as he thought it would. ========================================
Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Tallest ferris Wheel
======================================== , if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Give a free gift subscription to a friend! ======================================== Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby

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