Dear Webby: Hidden phishing URLs in Outlook Express 

Good Morning,   !
Thursday,  July 26, 2007

The keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole
cause of all our adversities.
--- Sophocles

Nothing says, 'I have no idea what to get you,' quite like
giant beige bath towels.
--- Missbhavens

"The reason there are so few female politicians is that it
is too much trouble to put makeup on two faces."
--- Maureen Murphy


Mullany arrived at J.F.K. Airport and wandered around the
terminal with tears streaming down his cheeks. An airline
employee asked him if he was already homesick.
"No," replied the Mullany. "I've lost all me luggage!"
"How'd that happen?"
"The cork fell out!"


DIET: It's something most of us do religiously:
We eat what we want and
we pray That we won't gain weight.


, if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: 
 Thanks for your votes!


 Good News and Bad News For a Pastor
 Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river.
 Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.

 Good News: The Women's Guild voted to send you a get-well card.
 Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.

 Good News: The Elder Board accepted your job description the way
 you wrote it.
 Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search
 committee to find somebody capable of filling the position.

 Good News:  You finally found a choir director who approaches
 things exactly the same way you do.
 Bad News: The choir mutinied.

 Good News: Mrs.  Jones is wild about your sermons.
 Bad News: Mrs.  Jones is also wild about the "Gong Show,"
 "Beavis and  Butthead" and "Texas Chain Saw Massacre."

 Good News: Your women's softball team finally won a game.
 Bad News: They beat your men's softball team.

 Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
 Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of your

 Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three
 Bad News: You were on vacation.

 Good News: Your deacons want to send you to the Holy Land.
 Bad News: They are stalling until the next war.

 Good News: Your biggest critic just left your church.
 Bad News: He has been appointed the Head Bishop of your

 Good News: The youth in your church come to your house for a
 surprise visit.
 Bad News:  It's in the middle of the night and they are armed
 with toilet paper and shaving cream to "decorate" your house.


Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter
=========================================== Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to a mother and daughter in Sarnia, Ontario Family Bust July 20, 2007 - Sarnia, Ontario - London Free Press It's not the kind of mother-daughter memory they'll soon forget. A woman in her 40s and her daughter, in her 20s, face pot possession charges after a Sarnia police officer found a car filled with smoke along Harbour Road. The OPP Marine officer, who was just leaving his boat, said the women told him they were waiting for Sarnia Bayfest festivities in Centennial Park. Police seized 14 joints and issued and the two were charged with possession of marijuana. They were released from custody and are to appear in Sarnia court Sept. 10. ... 2-sun.html ===========================================
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=========================================== Thanks to Sandie for this picture: =========================================== This is a true story that happened to one of my sister's goofy friends. It happened on I-75 in the northern lower peninsula of Michigan ( notorious for frequent tickets for speeding ). The friend was speeding north on I-75 when she noticed a Michigan State Police car behind her with it's flashing red lights on. The friend was very nervous, as she had never been stopped before and didn't know what to expect. The trooper approached her car then asked if she knew why he had stopped her. She said, " Oh, I bet I know why you stopped me. You want to sell me tickets to the policeman's ball." The trooper then told the friend that "Michigan State Police don't have balls." The friend started laughing uncontrollably. The troopers face turned bright red. He then proceeded to get back into his car and drove away. No ticket!! =========================================== Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! ================================== From the Tech Support Pits: From: Tina Re: Hidden phishing URLs in Outlook Dear Webby I know you warned us about Outlook not showing dangerous URLs and only the phony nicknames in spoofs and phishing emails, but the boneheads at Telus are not competent enough to support anything except Outlook and Outlook Express. At one time, all they supported was Eudora, but those days are as gone as cheap gas and my sexy looks. Is there ANY way at all to trick Outlook into showing whether for example the nickname "" links to eBay or to some crook in Russia or Romania? Thanks Tina Dear Tina I got a lot of mails like yours, and I spent a lot of time searching. However, it seems that, when those programs were written, making them "cute and bimbo-proof" was the top and only priority. Nobody knows of a setting to make them act like standard email programs. However, I found a third party patch that will fix that problem. It is called Phish Finder and is available at Currently it is still free, but don't count on that to last! Have FUN! DearWebby ========================================== Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! ========================================== Deeli's Kudos July 23, 2007 - Masonville, Colorado - AP Zoey is a Chihuahua, but when a rattlesnake lunged at her owners' 1-year-old grandson, she was a real bulldog. Booker West was splashing his hands in a birdbath in his grandparents' northern Colorado back yard when the snake slithered up to the toddler, rattled and struck. Five-pound Zoey jumped in the way and took the bites. ''She got in between Booker and the snake, and that's when I heard her yipe,'' Monty Long, the boy's grandfather, said Thursday. The dog required treatment and for a time it appeared she might not survive the bites she suffered earlier this month. Now she prances about. ''These little bitty dogs, they just don't really get credit,'' Booker's grandma Denise Long told the Loveland Daily Reporter-Herald. ... esnake.htm
============================================= The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at You can email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you. =============================================
Daily tip from Odors From Cooking If you like to fry foods but don't like the odors left behind, place a dish of white vinegar next to the stove where you will be frying. It will help absorb the odors. If you have odors from burnt food, boil some water in a sauce pan with a couple of slices of lemon.
Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here: ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly contests! Contest If you like the list, you can vote for it here: ========================================
A tall, handsome, confident gentleman walked over to a girl and made a disparaging remark about the men who had been chatting her up. She laughed gaily, "When I don't want a man's attentions," she confided, "and he asks where I live, I just say, 'I'm visiting here.'" "Ha-ha," he laughed, relishing her humor. "Where do you really live?" "In Alaska. I'm just visiting here." ============================================= HANGING OUT WITH JIM The new house was taking shape nicely. Jim put the ladder against one wall, went up onto the roof, to begin nailing down cedar shakes. He was a bit concerned about the weather, storm clouds were gathering. Suddenly he felt a wet cold nose in his ear. He sighed. "That was the dumbest thing I ever did, Bingo, was to teach you to climb a ladder." He ruffled the dogs head, and went about his work knowing the dog was more confident on the roof than he was. Bingo was a German Shepherd who doted on Jim. He wanted nothing more in life than to be where his owner was. It that meant being on the roof, so be it. It started to rain. Jim grabbed his tools, went to the edge of the roof, and gasped. "Bingo, you nut, you shoved the ladder away from the roof." He sat in the pouring rain, while Bingo hunkered down beside him. It would be hours before Jim's wife would be home from work. At last, her car pulled in. Jim was hugging Bingo, for warmth, his teeth were chattering. He waited for his wife to put the ladder back up, then came a bit unglued when she started to laugh. "What's so darn funny?" he demanded. "I'm freezing." "Honey," she replied, "Use the other ladder propped up on the other side of the house." Jim looked at Bingo, "Why didn't you tell me that.?" If only dogs could talk. Bingo was just doing what he always did, hanging out with Jim. If his owner insisted on sitting in the freezing rain, well, he had learned, that humans sometimes just weren't very bright. Stormy O' =============================================
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
======================================== Thanks to Sandie for this story: OLE 'N LENA HAVE A BABY Lena is pregnant with Ole's child. Late one night, Lena vakes Ole and says, "I tink it's time!" So Ole fired up the Yohn Deere tractor and took her to the hospital to have their first baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Ole and said, "A son! Ain't dat great!" Well, Ole got excited by dis, but yust den the doctor spoke up and said, "Hold on! We ain't finished yet!" The doctor den held up a little girl. He said, "Hey, Ole! You got you a daughter!" She's a pretty little ting, too." Ole got kind of puzzled by this, an then the doctor said, "Holey Moley, Ole, we still ain't done yet!" The doctor then delivered another boy and said, "Ole, you yust had yourself another boy!" Ole was flabbergasted by this news! A couple days later, Ole brought Lena and their three children home in the self-propelled combine. He was real serious and he asked Lena, "How come we got tree on the first try?" Lena said, "You remember dat night we ran out of Vaseline and you vent out in the garage and got dat dere 3-in-1 Oil?" Ole said, "Yeah, I do. Uffda! It's a dam good ting I didn't get the WD-40." ========================================
Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Power Catamaran Racing
======================================== , if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! Give a free gift subscription to a friend! ======================================== Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby

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