Dear Webby: IE Status Line problem 

Good Morning,   !
Sunday,  Aug 19, 2007
=========================================

Inspirations never go in for long engagements;
they demand immediate marriage to action."
--- Brendan Francis

What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say.
--- Ralph Waldo Emerson

=========================================

Two snooty women were sitting in the living room, waiting
for their hostess, who was slightly delayed in another room.

The daughter of the family was with the two women, on the
theory that she would keep the visitors occupied during the
wait.

The child was about six years old.  She was snub nosed,
spotted with splotchy freckles, buck toothed, and
bespectacled.  She maintained a deep silence and the two
ladies peered doubtfully at her.

Finally, one of the women muttered to the other, "She's not
very p - r - e - t - t - y, is she?"

Whereupon the child piped up, "Maybe not, but I'm quite
s - m - a - r - t  and I can  s - p - e - l - l...."

=========================================

A sad-faced Todd walked into a flower shop early one morning.

The clerk was ready to take his order for a funeral piece,
based on the look on Todd's face, but soon realized his
assumption was wrong as Todd asked for a basket of
flowers sent to his wife for their anniversary.

"And what day will that be?" the clerk asked.

Glumly he replied, "Yesterday."

========================================= , if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes! =========================================
A guy walked into his friend's office, he found him sitting at his desk, looking very depressed. "Hey, what's up with you?", he asks. "Oh, its my wife," replied the man sadly. "She's hired a new secretary for me." "Well, nothing wrong in that. Is she blonde or brunette or a redhead ?" "Neither. Her grandfather is bald." ============================================= Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter. ============================================= Thanks to Cookie for this story from her recent visit to New York: Two businessmen in NY are sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store ... as yet, the store isn't ready... only a few shelves are set up. One says to the other, "I bet any minute now some tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window and ask what we're selling." No sooner are the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious fellow walks to the window, has a peek, and in a Southern drawl asks, "Whacha y'all sellin' here?" With a sly smile, one of the men replies, "Oh! We're selling assholes here." Without skipping a beat, the rebel says, "Well, ah see y'all're doing right good, you only got two left!" =========================================== Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Florin Radu Hretu, 27, from Pascani, Romania OOOPS, wrong excuse! August 15, 2007 - Pascani, Romania - Ananova A Romanian man has been sacked after his mother visited him at work - minutes after he told his boss she had just died. Florin Radu Hretu, 27, from Pascani in Iasi county, had just asked to borrow some money to pay for her funeral. He has given the equivalent of 150 but had to immediately pay it back when his mother turned up a few minutes later. He was also fired and is also being investigated by police for fraud. A spokesman for the prosecutor's office, Liviu Beceru, said: "The young man tried to defend himself saying he received a call in which he was being informed about his mother death but refused to say who that person was." http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_2464094.html?menu= =========================================== Thanks to Dianne for this picture from the 2007 Lantern Festival in China =========================================== Thanks to Cindy for this story: When I lived with my parents a few years ago, I came home from work and found the back door open and our indoor-dog outside; very strange. Turns out my Mom had come home for lunch, let the dog out, forgot about him, left the door open and her book she was reading at the time on the kitchen table: 12 STEPS TO IMPROVE YOUR MEMORY." =========================================== Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! http://www.AFreeDish.com ================================== From the Tech Support Pits: From: Theo Re: MSIE Status line unprdictable Dear Webby, Some of the time my MSIE browser shows the URL of links that the mouse is hovering over, but sometimes it doesn't. At first I thought those were spoofed links, but it does it with perfectly good links too. Firefox shows the URLs in the status bar for those links quite OK. Is this a bug or something that can be fixed? Theo Dear Theo Yes, it is a MSIE bug, and no, it can't be fixed. I guess it's not predictable enough to let anybody pinpoint the exact cause. It's a fairly new bug and probably due to Microoft trying to sneak MSIE7 "features" into MSI6 behind your back. You can minimize the occurrence of this bug by avoiding ALL third party tool bars. In addition to that, in the advanced settings for Tools, Intenet Options, put a checkmark on "Show friendly URLs". The status bar message will be verbose, and instead of showing just the link, will say "shortcut to filename at URL", but it will show just about all URLs. I know it's klutzy, but until they fix it, that's the best I can come up with. Have FUN! DearWebby ========================================== Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! http://www.Ask4Ink.com ========================================== Deeli's Kudos August 16, 2007 - Alton, Ohio - IBS A man who had been missing in the New Hampshire woods since Sunday was found alive Tuesday afternoon after his dog led rescuers near his location. Fish and Game Department officials said that Chuck Schultz, 64, was hiking with his German shepherd in some woods near a hiking trail. An officer saw his pickup truck parked near the woods Sunday morning and became concerned when the vehicle was still there Monday afternoon. "The vehicle was parked there with a dog crate in the back," Fish and Game Lt. Jim Goss said. "He frequents the area to walk, and the dog crate was left open as if he and the dog had gone for a walk." Rescue teams had been searching for Schultz since Monday but were unable to locate him until his dog, Miss Moosey, emerged from the woods Tuesday afternoon. The dog was nervous and aggressive, but Nancy Lyon, a member of New England K-9 Search and Rescue, said she was able to gain Miss Moosey's trust. "I went up the trail a bit and tried to make myself smaller and make myself interesting enough so she felt could safely come to me, so I sat on the ground," Lyon said. Knowing that Miss Moosey had been in the woods for at least two days, Lyon offered her jars of meat baby food. "She came over at first and didn't want food," Lyon said. "Then, she decided she could take the food." Lyon was able to put a leash on the dog, who started leading searchers back into the woods. Miss Moosey led them to a spot on the trail, and a K-9 with the Fish and Game Department was able to pick up Schultz's scent from there. He was about 830 feet off the trail. "He is alive, though he seems to be dehydrated, disoriented," Goss said. Crews took Schultz out of the woods on an all-terrain vehicle, and he was placed in an ambulance. His family said that he was doing well but is still recovering in a hospital. Miss Moosey is being cared for by friends until she can be reunited with Schultz. http://www.kirotv.com/family/13898809/detail.html
============================================= The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at http://fire-cat.com/blog/ Email to the Express Empress at 8empress@fire-cat.com, and she will post it into the blog for you. =============================================
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Get Rid of Monthly Storage Fees Sort through your storage unit and keep what you want, but sell or give the rest to the needy. Get out of paying those monthly storage fees! That's money wasted that you could have invested or used for vacation. A storage locker for 5 years at $75 a month would cost $4,500! Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly Contests ! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
======================================== I'm used to do some locksmithing and still get called out for all types of emergencies. Just this morning, I received a call from a young lady telling me she had locked her keys in her truck. She was very frantic, as she had to get to work. I told her the cost, found out where she was, and I was on my way. Since she told me she thought the keys were in the truck (but couldn't remember for sure where she had put them,) I began working on opening the passenger door of her truck. As I was maneuvering my tool to unlock the door, I looked across at the driver door and noticed... it was unlocked. Without a word, I walked around and opened the door for her. 'Thank you!' she said. 'I didn't even know you could unlock the driver's door from the passenger side.'" ============================================= BETTER MANAGEMENT I was in a hurry, late for a meeting some two hundred miles away. The weather was lovely. I decided to take my black Lab along for the ride. She would be allowed into the meeting with me. Opening the back door to the car, the lab jumped in. Hoping not to get pulled over for speeding, I made good time, arriving only a few minutes late. I let the dog out, but, there was something very wrong. My dog had a patch of white on her chest. This black lab was a male, and, oh no, he was my neighbour's dog! I phoned her on my cell. She was laughing so hard she could hardly speak. My dog was sitting patiently in my driveway, two hundred miles away, while her dog had enjoyed the ride. Her black lab enjoyed the meeting, the pats on his head, while I kept my mouth shut. There was no way on this earth I was going to admit what I had done. The meeting I went to was, "How to Better Manage Your Life While Boosting Your Memory!" Stormy O'
============================================= If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog =============================================
A father took his 5-year-old son to several baseball games where The Star-Spangled Banner was sung before the start of each game. Then the father and son attended a church on a Sunday shortly before Independence Day. The congregation sang The Star-Spangled Banner, and after everyone sat down, the little boy suddenly yelled out, "PLAY BALL!!!"
============================================= Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: China =============================================
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If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
============================================= Give a friend a free gift subscription to the Humor Letter ============================================= Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby





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