Dear Webby: Computer vision fatigue 

Good Morning,   !
Saturday,  Sept 8, 2007

Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word. There are no exceptions to this rule. --- Stephen King "The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself." --- Mark Caine
Thanks to Sandie for this story: A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories. As I enjoy two servings per night and a few more on weekends, I consume 3,500 calories of chocolate in a week, which equals to one pound of weight per week. Therefore, in the last three and a half years, I have had a chocolate caloric intake of about 180 pounds. I only weigh 165 pounds, so without chocolate, I would have wasted away to nothing about three months ago. I owe my life to chocolate!
From Doc A mother looked out a window and saw Johnny playing church with their three kittens. He had them lined up and was preaching to them. The mother turned around to do some work. A while later she heard meowing and scratching on the door. She went to the window and saw Johnny baptizing the kittens. She opened the window and said, "Johnny, stop that! You'll drown those kittens." Johnny looked at her and said with much conviction in his voice: "They should had thought of that before they joined my church."

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An American is taking a train from London to Manchester. During the trip he starts complaining about the British to the Englishman sitting across from him in the compartment. "You English are too stuffy," the American says. "You think your stiff upper lips set you above the rest of us. Look at me: I have Italian blood, French blood, a little Indian blood and some Swedish blood. What do you say to that?" Says the Englishman dryly, "Very sporting of your mother." Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Marius Varzar, 23, from Botosani, Romania Man confesses to murder to get lift home A Romanian man confessed to a murder he did not commit because he wanted a lift home. Marius Varzar, 23, from Botosani, had run out of money and wanted to be taken home by police. He told a police patrol in a village 100 miles from his home that he killed one of his friends and wanted to give himself up. Varzar was arrested and taken to Botosani by a police van where officers were investigating the case of a man found dead in the street. But he was charged and fined after later forensic evidence r evealed the victim was not killed and died from natural causes. The alleged murderer admitted he was only looking for a free ride home. Local police spokesman Florin Gavrilet said: "After interrogating the suspect it turned out he drank all his money and wanted to return home, so he invented this crime." Police did not say how much the man was fined but said the amount was established also to cover for the transportation expenses.
Thanks to Cookie for sending this picture:
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From the Tech Support Pits: From: Lucy Re: Eye strain Dear Webby I am working on a large but very important project, but lately after half a day or so, my eyes get tired and sandy. When that happens, I can't concentrate and all I want to do is go for a nap. Is there a solution for that? Lucy Dear Lucy First check the air currents in the room. If necessary, get a smoker to assist you. Especially in a darkened room a flashlight and some smoke will quickly tell you if air from anywhere is bouncing off the monitor or keyboard into your face and drying your eyes. If it is, deflect the air somehwre else. Secondly, raise the monitor or lower the chair so that you sit in the sexy positioning like the typists before the computer age, chest out, back and neck straight, head slightly raised so that a ruler placed under your chin and pointing forward, points slightly upward, not level or down. Your neck and head circulation will improve instantly, and your eyes will feel a lot better. As a fringe benefit, especially if you combine that body posture with a silly grin about it, works as an anti-depressant and mood optimizer. Have FUN! DearWebby
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"Here's something that will really make you feel grown up," said a father to his teenage daughter, "Your very own phone bill."

Deeli's Kudos Sent in by Dar The Ontario government has unveiled "Highway of Heroes" signs along a stretch of Highway 401, formally dedicating the route to Canada's fallen soldiers. The 172-kilometre stretch, officially designated as the MacDonald-Cartier Freeway, extends from Toronto to Trenton. It is the route taken to transport the bodies of fallen soldiers to the coroner's office in Toronto once they return to Canada. Large crowds -- including veterans and emergency service personnel -- have routinely gathered on the highway's overpasses to wave flags in support of the troops. Premier Dalton McGuinty said Friday that the signs will serve as a commemoration of the bravery and sacrifice of Canadian soldiers. "The road that links Ontario and Quebec is named in honour of the two leaders who gave life to our young nation more than 140 years ago," said McGuinty. "It is enormously fitting, then, that we dedicate a portion of this very road in honour of those who gave their lives for our nation."

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at http://fire-cat.com/blog/ Email to the Express Empress at 9empress@fire-cat.com, and she will post it into the blog for you.
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Stocking Staples and Cooking From Scratch The key to cooking from scratch is making sure that you have staples on hand. Potatoes are cheap, can be stored for a long time and can be used in a variety of dishes. Other staples to keep on hand are rice, beans, cooking oil and flour. Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! You can even submit tips and win prizes in weekly Contests ! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:

While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting an old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted, "are there any gators around here?!" "Naw," the man hollered back, "Ain't been any for years!" Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming toward the shore. As he got closer to shore he shouted to the guy again "What did you do to get rid of the gators?" "We didn't do nothin'," the beachcomber said. "The sharks got 'em all."

If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog
A woman passed out and her husband,Bubba, called 911. The operator said they would send someone out right away and asked, "Where do you live?" Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?" There was a long pause and finally, Bubba said, "How about I drag her over to Oak Street and you can meet us there?"

Thanks to Sandie for today's Bonus Link: Topiary Galleries
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Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby





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