Dear Webby: Defragler 


Good Morning,   !
Friday,  Nov 9, 2007
Wear something red today to show your support for the troops!


When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends. --- Japanese Proverb
Thanks to Vickey for this story: According to my mother, she and my dad decided to start a family soon after he became an officer in the Air Force. When months went by without success, they consulted the base physician, who chose to examine my mom right then and there. "Please disrobe," he told her. "With him in the room?" she yelled, pointing to my father. Turning to my dad, the doctor said, "Captain, I think I found the problem."
Thanks to Scorpio9 for this story: A teacher puts a photograph of a tomcat on the blackboard, and proceeds to ask the class, if they can tell her how the tail is attached to the cat. Little Mary has the first attempt and answers, "By fur, Miss?" The teacher replies, "Not quite right, Mary, but a good try." Meanwhile all during the lesson, Little Johnny is sitting down the back raising his hand in the air saying, "Me, Miss!" "Me, Miss!" The next student the teacher's picks is Peter, and he answers "Is it attached by skin, Miss?" The teacher replies... "Not quite right either, Peter... Anyone else want to try?" Finally, the teacher had no choice but to pick Little Johnny. She said to Johnny, "What do you think the tail is attached by?" Johnny replied, "Judging by the size of those nuts on that cat... I'd say, it would have to be bolted on!"

, if you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
Thanks to Ralph for this story: My wife works in a business where each employee has a shared folder based on their position in the company. The receptionist has 'reception' and so on. This business went through a placement service for an extra help employee, who ended up working the front desk. One day i got a call asking to help out since all the files were gone, Months and months worth. Of course the temp put all her files where they belonged, C:\TEMP. Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to District Court Judge Denis McLoughlin in County Donegal, North-West Ireland Non metric fine October 31, 2007 - Dublin, Ireland - AP When police caught driver David Clarke flying down a road at 180 kilometers per hour this month, he looked likely to lose his license. But a country judge reduced the charge and let the 31-year- old information technology worker stay on the road after concluding the speed did not look as bad when converted into miles, or 112 mph. "I am not excusing his driving. He should not have been traveling at that speed," District Court Judge Denis McLoughlin said in his verdict, delivered Tuesday in County Donegal, northwest Ireland. McLoughlin was quoted as saying the speed seemed "very excessive," but did not look "as bad" when converted into miles. He lowered the charge from to driving carelessly, and fined him euro1,000 ($1,450); if convicted of the tougher charge of driving dangerously, Clarke would have lost his license. The episode underscored Ireland's slow mental conversion to metric. Ireland switched its speed limits from miles to kilometers in January 2005, but most cars still display speeds principally in miles. Clarke, a Dubliner, had been traveling to a Donegal wedding October 13 when he was clocked by a police checkpoint going 180 kph (112 mph) in a 100 kph (62 mph) zone. Law enforcement on Ireland's roads is notoriously lax, and judges frequently acquit offending drivers because of loopholes and vagaries in the law. One in six Irish drivers has never passed an on-the-road test, according to Transport Department statistics. http://www.wral.com/news/strange/story/1989712/ And one in twentysix Irish drivers reports to have driven while sober on one or more occasion.
Thanks to Joan for another deer picture Trampolin surprise!
Get a Dish Network for as low as $19.99/month Free HD & DVR Equipment & Free installation Free Dish Network Satellite TV Systems We are nationwide Dishnetwork retailer! http://www.AFreeDish.com
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Kay Re: Defragler Dear Webby, this is something new from Crap Cleaner, what is your opinion? Love your newsletter and especially the tech support. Kay Dear Kay It might be OK, but I have a hunch it will take a few years to get up to the level of DisKeeper. I guess it all depends whether your data and drives are worth $30 or whether the lure of an untested free bargain is irresistible for you. By the time they are at Version 2 or 3, and have proven themselves, I might well be recommending them too. But for now, I am recommending DisKeeper. Diskeeper Have FUN! DearWebby

Save up to 70% on printer inkjet cartridges 100% Guarantee & Free shipping Discount ink cartridges, refill kits & laser toners. Recycle your empty cartridges - Save or make money! http://www.Ask4Ink.com
Kate goes over to visit one of her friends. While she is at her friend's house it starts to rain very heavily. Her friend tells her to spend the night at her house and go home the next day. When she hears this, Kate rushes out the door and comes a while later totally drenched and carrying a small shopping bag. So her friend asks "Where did you run off too?" "I went home to get my pajamas!"

Deeli's Kudos November 2, 2007 - Daytona Beach, Florida - UPI A teller in Florida ended her day by helping capture a man who allegedly first tried to open an account and then rob the bank where she works, police said. Daytona Beach police said the Sun Trust bank branch teller was leaving work Monday afternoon when she spotted the would-be customer / robber, the Orlando Sentinel reported Tuesday. The man was arrested and booked for attempted armed robbery under the name John Doe. Earlier, the man had tried to open a bank account only to leave after being told he lacked proper identification, authorities said. He returned to the bank and handed a note with a phone number on it to a teller. Not understanding the man was trying to rob the bank and unable to read what the note said, the teller asked the potential thief if he wanted her to call someone for him. He told her he wanted money. http://www.arcamax.com/weirdnews/s-251057-346530

From today, seven years ago: The two major party presidential candidates today agreed that Americans are seeing too much inappropriate material in popular entertainment. However, they disagreed on the details. The Republican candidate, George W. Bush, stated that there is too much bloody violence in the movies and on television. Vice President Al Gore, his Democratic opponent, stated meanwhile that the media present Americans with too much sex and frontal nudity. In other words, Bush says there is too much gore and Gore says there is too much bush.

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at http://fire-cat.com/blog/ Email to the Express Empress at eleven1T1empress@fire-cat.com, and she will post it into the blog for you.
.
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Cloudy or Crystallized Honey You can restore cloudy or crystallized honey to its original state by placing it in a pan of hot tap water. Let it sit for 5 to 10 minutes and it will be good as new. Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:

The software engineering field is staffed primarily by men; the ratio of male to female software engineers is on the order of 15 to 1. This makes it pretty easy for women to find potential mates among their peers. However, software types have a well-earned reputation for being... a little strange. While discussing the prospect of working in the software industry, one woman commented to another: "The odds are good, but the goods are odd." ------------- One look at VISTA would convince anybody that she has a point!

If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Round Barns
.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
Well, , that's all for today. have FUN ! Dear Webby





[ view entry ] ( 195 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3 / 716 )

<<First <Back | 137 | 138 | 139 | 140 | 141 | 142 | 143 | 144 | 145 | 146 | Next> Last>>