Dear Webby: File Associations 



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Good Morning, ! Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Yes, we have to divide up our time like that, between our politics and our equations. But to me our equations are far more important, for politics are only a matter of present concern. A mathematical equation stands forever. --- Albert Einstein
Thanks to Ross for this story: A friend, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort with his family on the weekends. Every Sunday morning he would take his 7-year old granddaughter out for a drive in the car for some bonding time. One particular Sunday however, he had a bad cold and really didn't feel like being up at all. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and said that she would take their granddaughter out. When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see her grandfather. "Well, did you enjoy your ride with grandma?" "Oh yes, Papa" the girl replied, "and do you know what? We didn't see a single dumb bastard or stupid **** head!"
A doctor sees the old man walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm! The next time the old man had an appointment, the doc says, "You're really doing great, aren't you?" "Just doing what you told me, Doctor. Get a hot mamma and be cheerful." "I didn't say that... I said, You've got a heart murmur, be careful..."

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"Why Men Can't Win" If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you are a male chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework, you are a pansy. If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.. If you don't work enough, you are a good for nothing bum. If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your rear and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favoritism. If she gets job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity. If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it's male indifference. If you cry, you are a wimp. If you don't, you are an insensitive bastard. Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Charlena Graham in Augusta, Georgia Should have known better! January 25, 2008 - Augusta, Georgia - UPI A deputy coroner in Georgia has been charged with stealing gift cards from a woman who killed herself on New Year's Eve. Charlena Graham was arrested Wednesday in her office in Richmond County. She was immediately dismissed from her position after being charged with a single count of theft by taking. Graham allegedly appropriated five gift cards with a total value of about $400 from stores that included Target, Macy's and Victoria's Secret, officials said. Because Graham is a public official, the theft is automatically a felony. Sheriff's deputies gave the woman's personal items to Graham, the report said. Family members later reported that gift cards appeared to be missing. Investigators have evidence that includes videotapes of Graham allegedly using the gift cards to buy items for her own use, Sheriff Ronnie Strength reported. http://www.arcamax.com/newsheadlines/s-293029-412858
Thanks to Dianne for sending this picture: No global warming yet!
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From the Tech Support Pits: From: Barry Re: Powerpoint Association Dear Webby-I frequently get e-mails with PPS attachments. When I try to open them, I get a window that tells me to create an association for the file. I went to Micro soft, and downloaded Power Point viewer, but I still can't open these e-mails. How do I create an association? Thanx for any help you can give me. ~~~Barry Dear Barry Open the file explorer and go to where you stash your PPS files. Highlight one, and right-click it. Select: OPEN WITH Select the PowerPoint Viewer Put a checkmark on "Always use this program for this type of file" Hit Apply and OK. Have FUN! DearWebby
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"Why Men Can't Win" Cont'd If you make a decision without consulting her, you are a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's liberated woman. If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination. If she asks you, it's a favor. If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear, you are a pervert. If you don't, you are a fag. If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you are a sexist. If you don't, you are unromantic. If you try to keep yourself in shape, you are vain. If you don't, you are a slob. If you buy her flowers, you are after something. If you don't, you are not thoughtful. If you are proud of your achievements, you are up yourself. If you don't, you are not ambitious. If she has a headache, she is tired. If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore. If you want it too often, you are oversexed. If you don't, there must be someone else.

Deeli's Kudos January 28, 2008 - Koolunga, Australia - Herald Sun A boy has been hailed a hero after he gave his father mouth-to-mouth and ran 2 miles for help when their car rolled over. Lachlan "Lochie" Nally, 11, saw that dad Matthew's chest wasn't moving after their car rolled in the South Australian north yesterday. The brave boy, who suffered minor injuries, performed CPR on his father then ran barefoot 3km to the Koolunga hotel. He bashed on the door and woke the owner, who called an ambulance. Chief Insp Graham Goodwin said it was "one of the most heroic acts I've seen". "As you can imagine he's been in a very serious collision so that's distressing in itself," he said. He said Lochie's bravery should be recognised. Mr Nally, 36, is in a serious condition in an Adelaide hospital. http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/ ... 61,00.html


The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at http://fire-cat.com/blog/ Email to the Express Empress at 1empress@fire-cat.com, and she will post it into the blog for you.
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Removing Paint From Hands Try rubbing baby oil or Vaseline on your hands to loosen paint stains. Keep paint from lodging under your fingernails by rubbing them over a bar of soap before painting. Prevent paint from getting on your hands altogether by wearing rubber gloves when you paint. Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended ! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:

Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room. After a while he emerged and informed his mother that he had thought it over and then said a prayer. "Fine," said the pleased mother. "If you ask God to help you not misbehave, He will help you." "Oh, I didn't ask Him to help me not misbehave," said Johnny. "That would be no fun. I asked Him to make you not notice it."

If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Hard Shell Cats & Mice
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If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby





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