Dear Webby: Dragging files 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Wednesday,  June 4, 2008

Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest. --- Mark Twain
Thanks to Ross for bringing back this classic: The hurricane came unexpectedly. The ship went down and was lost. The man found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing to do. Only bananas and coconuts. So for the next four months he ate bananas, drank coconut juice and longed for his old life. He fixed his gaze on the sea, hoping to spot a rescue ship. One day, as he was lying on the beach, he spotted movement out of the corner of his eye. It was a rowboat, and in it was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen. She rowed up to him. In disbelief, he asked her: "Where did you come from? How did you get here?" "I rowed from the other side of the island," she said. "I landed here when my cruise ship sank." "Amazing," he said. "I didn't know anyone else survived. How many are there? You were lucky to have a rowboat wash up with you." "Its only me," she said, “and the rowboat didn't wash up; nothing did." He was confused. "Then how did you get the rowboat?" "Oh, simple," replied the woman. "I made the rowboat out of materials that I found on the island. The oars were whittled from Gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm branches and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree." "B-B-But that's impossible," stuttered the man. "You had no tools or hardware. How did you manage?" "Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the other side of the island there is a very unusual rock formation exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into iron. I used that for tools, and used the tools to make the hardware." "But enough of that," she said. "Where do you live?" Sheepishly, he confessed that he had been sleeping on the beach the whole time. "Well, let's row over to my place, then." she said. After a few minutes of rowing she docked the boat at a small wharf. As the man looked to the shore, he nearly fell out of the boat. Before him was a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman tied up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man could only stare ahead, dumbstruck. As they walked into the house, she said casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please; would you like a drink?" "No, no thank you," he said, still dazed. "I can't take any more coconut juice." "It's not coconut juice," the woman replied. "I have a still. How about a Pina Colada?" Trying to hide his amazement, the man accepted, and they sat down on her couch to talk. After they had exchanged their stories, the woman announced, "I'm going to slip into something comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom." No longer questioning anything, the man went into the bathroom. There in the cabinet was a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge were fastened onto it's end. "This woman is amazing," he thought. "What next?" When he returned, she greeted him wearing nothing but vines and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckoned for him to sit down next to her. "Tell me," she began, suggestively, slithering closer to him, "we've been out here for a very long time. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing right now, something you've been longing for all these months. You know..." She stared into his eyes. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You mean--?" he replied, “I can check my e-mail from here?"
Thanks to Cookie for this picture:
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Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to police in Newcastle, England Sniveling Ninnies May 29, 2008 - Newcastle Upon Tyne, UK - UPI A British woman said police were being "petty and vindictive" when they fined her teenage son about $100 for letting a balloon float away. Max Twizell, 16, was ordered to fork over nearly $100 for littering after he let go of a balloon filled with helium at a charity gathering in Newcastle, England, the Daily Mail reported Sunday. "Will the council fine every charity that holds a balloon race 50 pounds ($100) per balloon? How about toddlers in prams who accidentally release their helium balloon?" the boy's mother, Lorraine Twizell said. Stephen Savage, director of regulatory services and public protection, told the newspaper authorities are required to bust those who litter. "We believe pursuing action against offenses like this sends out an uncompromising message that litter dropping in the city will not be tolerated," he said Copyright 2008 by United Press International
Thanks to Robert for this: TAKING A WOMAN TO BED What is the difference between girls/woman Aged: 8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58. 68, and 78 ? At 8 -- You take her to bed and tell her a story. At 18 -- You tell her a story and take her to bed. At 28 -- You don't need to tell her a story to take her to bed. At 38 -- She tells you a story and takes you to bed. At 48 -- She tells you a story to avoid going to bed. At 58 -- You stay in bed to avoid her story. At 68 -- If you take her to bed, that'll be a story! At 78 -- What story??? What bed??? Who the heck are you???
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Carol Re: Dragging Hi Webby..... Please don't think this is a stupid question. I have seen the phrase "drag to" and I know how to click and drag, but what I don't know do you drag to another place? If I wanted to drag to let's say my d drive, that's on another "page". Thanks. Carol Dear Carol Don't run the file explorer full screen. Narrow it down so that it just uses a third of the screen. Then open another one beside it. Now you can drag from one to the other. If you use Windows in Classic Style, you can even split each window and show folders (instead of tasks) on the left side of each File Explorer. Then you can drag stuff even into closed folders showing on the left. Have FUN! DearWebby

Thanks to Rubye for this story: During a commercial airline flight an Air Force pilot was seated next to a young mother with a baby in her arms. When her baby began crying during the descent for landing, the mother began nursing her infant as discreetly as possible. The pilot pretended not to notice and, upon debarking, he gallantly offered his assistance to help with the various baby-related articles. When the young mother expressed her gratitude, the pilot responded, 'Gosh, that's a good looking baby...and he sure was hungry!' Somewhat embarrassed, the mother explained that her pediatrician said breast feeding would help alleviate the pressure in the baby's ears. The Air Force pilot sadly shook his head, and in true pilot fashion exclaimed........'And all these years, I've been chewing gum.'

Deeli's Kudos June 3, 2008 - Greensburg, Indiana - UPI Authorities in Indiana Monday were investigating an incident in which a pilot crash-landed his ailing plane just after his load of skydivers got out safely. The small plane had 14 skydivers on board, including a pair of first-timers, when it developed engine trouble Sunday while flying near Greensburg, Ind. The plane descended from 7,000 to 5,000 feet where the pilot was able to level it off enough for the skydivers to jump out, sheriff's deputies said. "Everybody was calm," Bob Dougherty, owner of Skydive Greensburg, told the station. "They exited the plane when they were told to. The pilot then proceeded to the north end and started his maneuvers to get the plane back down to the runway if possible." The plane flipped as it landed on the skydiving school's runway. The pilot was uninjured. Copyright 2008 by United Press International

Mr. Smith was in his hospital bed and had been getting many tests done. After several days of hospitalization, a nurse finally came into his room and stated, "Mr. Smith, I have some bad news and some good news. Which do you want to hear first?" Mr. Smith solemnly replied, "Well, tell me the bad news first." The nurse said, "The bad news is that your HMO refuses to pay for you to have an enema. But, the good news is that I am qualified to slap the s**t outa you."

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Saving Money at Restaurants Don't order alcoholic drinks. Try meatless dishes, they are almost always cheaper. Go out to lunch, instead of dinner. Split large dishes between two people. Order off the senior menu if you can. Serving sizes are ridiculously large at most restaurants. Visit ThriftyFun For More Dining Tips By Clicking Here ... 6_935.html Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

While stationed in Washington, D.C., a man used Arlington National Cemetery as a shortcut on his way to give a briefing at Fort Myer. To his surprise, he encountered a roadblock manned by the military police. An MP approached him and asked in a stern voice, "Are you supposed to be here?" Unsure of what to say, he replied, "Not yet." The MP held back a smile and waved him on.

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Air Show
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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