Dear Webby, how do I switch to an external monitor? 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Friday,  June 6, 2008

Today is Friday. Time to wear something
red to how your support for the troops!

Fear is the darkroom where negatives develop. --- Max Walker You can only be young once. But you can always be immature. --- Dave Barry If people never did silly things, nothing intelligent would ever get done. --- Ludwig Wittgenstein
Rough Translations: RIGOR MORRIS: The cat is dead. RESPONDEZ S'IL VOUS PLAID: Honk if you're Scottish HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS?: Can you drive a French motorcycle? VENI, VIDI, VISA: I came, I saw, I shopped. COGITO EGGO SUM: I think, therefore I am ... a waffle QUE SERA SERF: Life is feudal LEROI EST MORT. JIVE LEROI: Leroy is dead. Dance Leroy! POSH MORTEM: Death styles of the rich and famous PRO BOZO PUBLICO: Support your local clown MONAGE A TROIS: I am three years old HASTE CUISINE: Fast French food QUIP PRO QUO: A fast retort ALOHA OY: Love; greetings; farewell; and from such a pain you should never know MAZEL TON: Tons of luck VISA LA FRANCE: Don't leave your chateau without it CARNE DIEM: Seize the meat
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Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to a 21 year old man in Utrecht, Netherlands Klutzy Mooner June 4, 2008 - Utrecht, Netherlands - AP Utrecht police say a 21-year-old Dutch man is recovering after a "mooning" that went horribly wrong. A police statement says the man and two others had run down a street in Utrecht with their pants pulled down in the back "for a joke." It says that at one point the 21-year-old "pushed his behind against the window of a restaurant" that broke and resulted in "deep wounds to his derriere." The statement released Tuesday says police detained the three men after the incident Sunday morning. But the cafe owner decided not to press charges after the men agreed to pay for the broken window. The injured man was treated for his injuries at a nearby hospital. ... ing_mishap

From the Tech Support Pits: From: Elsa Re: Switching to external monitor Dear Webby My laptop has a plug in the back, or is that a socket?, to plug a monitor in. I do have a large monitor with much higher resolution than the laptop. However, when I plug it in, nothing shows up on it. What do I have to do to make it work? Elsa Dear Elsa Try holding down the FN or Func key on the laptop, then tap the F8 key. That normally switches to external video. When you do that, the laptop video turns off. You don't get both. The laptop will recalc the video for grown-ups type 4:3 ratio and not saw off the bottom third, but it will not increase the resolution to the same sharpness, that you are used to from desktop computers. You may have to adjust the font point per inch size a bit for more comfortable viewing. By the way, you will have to hit FN + F8 every time you start Windows, and it won't necessarily work until the computer has switched from the black boot part to the color video part. Have FUN! DearWebby

A woman went to a computer dating service and said she didn't care about looks, income or background. All she wanted was a man of upright character. Then a man came in and told them the only thing he was seeking in a woman was intelligence. The service matched them together at once because they had one thing in common -- they were both pathological liars.

Deeli's Kudos June 4, 2008 - Kingston, Pennsylvania - AP The young woman probably thought the 71-year-old veteran, whose friend was in a wheelchair, would make an easy target. She was wrong. Harry Kopenis chased and tackled the 22-year-old woman he says robbed him at an ATM in northeastern Pennsylvania. Then, with help from his friend in a wheelchair, he held her until police arrived. "Maybe she thought I was easy prey. She didn't think I was going to get her. Well, senior citizens aren't easy prey," Kopenis said. Police charged Erin Vanmatre, of Kingston, with robbery, harassment and other offenses. Vanmatre, who was on probation for conspiracy to commit theft, was locked up on $10,000 bail. It wasn't clear if she had an attorney. Kopenis said he's not sure how he was able to catch Vanmatre, considering he suffered a stroke five years ago and is on various prescription medications. He pointed to the sky and said, "It was a source up there who gave me the energy." ... fOa_UuQE4F

A woman was out shopping one day with her son. The boy spotted a man who was bowlegged. The boy pulled on Mom's hand and said, "Momma, look at the bowlegged man!" Mom was mortified and told her son that it was not polite to point to a person and make that sort of comment. For punishment, the boy had to read a play by Shakespeare. He couldn't go shopping again until he finished reading the play. Finally he finished and his mom took him once again to the mall. Again he spied a bowlegged man, but remembered what happened the last time. So he pulled on his mother's hand and said, "Lo, what manner of men are these, Who wear their balls in parentheses?"

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Saving Money on Video Games Don't buy games as soon as they come out. A year later you can often find games for half their original price. Even if you only wait a few weeks, you can find the hot games in the used market at local stores or on eBay. Visit ThriftyFun For Frugal Living Tips By Clicking Here ... _1307.html Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

A man went to the police station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. "You'll get your chance in court," said the desk sergeant. "No, no, no!" said the man. "I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I've been trying to do that for years!"

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Sequim Washington
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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