Dear Webby: Upgrading from Vista to XP-SP2 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Monday,  June 9, 2008

Vista is bad for windows. Every time a Vista machine is thrown out the window, the glass breaks. --- Socratex
Carly went to the eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses. The doctor directed her to read lines of letters with the left eye while covering the right eye. Carly was so mixed up on which eye was which that the eye doctor in disgust took a paper sack, cut out a hole to see through with one eye, put it on her head to cover up the appropriate eye, and asked her to read the letters again. As he did so, he noticed tears dripping from the bottom of the paper bag. "Look," said the doctor, "there's no need to get so upset about needing glasses." "I know," she cried, "But I had my heart set on wire frames."
Thanks to Cookie for sending this picture: Bad hair day, Cookie?
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Thanks to Deeli's Bonehead reports: An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Amanda Hudson More money than brains June 3, 2008 - Marbella, Spain - UPI A woman says her $8.8 million home in Marbella, Spain, was trashed by 400 revelers who showed up for a party her daughter advertised on the Internet. Amanda Hudson said she gave her daughter, Jodie, permission to throw her 16th birthday party at the house, but she lost control of the shindig after hundreds of people showed up to party, the Daily Mail reported Thursday. Jodie Hudson had sent out word about her birthday bash on social networking sites Facebook and Bebo as the "party of the year," the British newspaper reported. The advertisements, which included the address of the house, promised "there's going be a lot of alcohol and an amazing DJ." Hudson said $12,000 worth of jewelry and multiple clothing items were stolen during the party. Other items, including a TV, were thrown into the house's pool. She said the house is usually rented out for $8,000 a week during the summer, but the damage done by the party has made the residence unlivable. Copyright 2008 by United Press International
The man, trying to start up a conversation with another man said, "Who is the ugly lady over there?" The second man said, "Why, that's my wife!" Trying to get out of an embarrassing situation, the first man said, "No, not her, the other one!" The second man said, "That's my daughter!"
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Jerome Re: Upgrade to XP Dear Webby, About your explanation about putting XP on a laptop, I honestly hope she didnít have any trouble. I have finally figured an average to do it on laptops and on desktops as I have now completed my 900th desktop and my 1100th laptop. Laptops are $325.00 plus shipping and a copy of XP usually 129.00 but I have found most people have a copy so I split that cost out. Turnaround from receipt to shipment is generally 72 hours, except for some HPís that drive me crazy!! Desktops are $275.00 plus shipping and a copy of XP usually 129.00 but I have found most people have a copy so I split that cost out. Turnaround from receipt to shipment is generally 72 hours. I do have a brick and mortar location for deliveries, and have been in this business for 40 years unfortunately. I used to work on good old UNIVAC memory systems. Hey have a good one and if any body ever needs serious work done on their computers, Iím available and can even do remote work for many simple tasks. Jerome Hi Jerome That will be good news for a lot of people who don't have the time or expertise to upgrade from Vista to XP on their own. ---------- For those of you who don't know Jerome, he has been a friend and client for over ten years and I can highly recommend him! To protect his address from spammers, If you want his email address, hit REPLY and ask me. Have FUN! DearWebby

The interviewer examined the job application then turned to the prospective employee. "I see you have put ASAP down for the date you are available to start, meaning as soon as possible, of course. However, I see you've put AMAP down for required salary. I don't believe I've ever seen that before, what does it mean?" The applicant replied, "As Much as Possible!"

Deeli's Kudos June 3, 2008 - Tallahassee, Florida - UPI A 101-year-old Florida woman known as the oldest driver on the planet says people may be surprised she renewed her driver's license until 2011. Lillian Cox began driving in 1915 and can still be seen putting around Tallahassee, Fla., in her 1984 sedan. "They're surprised that I'd get a driver's license at 101. But I have four more years," she said. "I'm sure I look (101 years old) but they don't let me know that." Cox said, however, she wants to be driven to her upcoming appearance on "Tonight Show with Jay Leno" in a limousine. Copyright 2008 by United Press International

As the family gathered for a big dinner together, the youngest son announced that he had just signed up at an army recruiter's office. There were audible gasps around the table, then some laughter, as his older brothers shared their disbelief that he could handle this new situation. "Oh, come on, quit joking," snickered one. "You didn't really do that, did you?" "You would never get through basic training," scoffed another. The new recruit looked to his mother for help, but she was just gazing at him. When she finally spoke, she simply asked, "Do you really plan to make your own bed every morning?"

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Protect Your Mattress Put a protective cover over your mattresses. If you have kids that are prone to accidents, a vinyl cover works the best. Anyone's mattress can benefit from a mattress pad, it keeps dirt and sweat from getting into the mattress and prevents you from having to wash your mattress. Visit ThriftyFun For More Bedroom Tips By Clicking Here ... 6_301.html Visit ThriftyFun For More Recreation Tips By Clicking Here Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

Somewhat skeptical of his son's newfound determination to become Charles Atlas, the father nevertheless followed the teenager over to the weight-lifting department, admiring a set of weights. "Please, Dad," pleaded the boy, "I promise I'll use 'em every day." "I don't know, Michael. It's really a commitment on your part," the father pointed out. "Please, Dad?" the boy continued. "They're not cheap either," the father came back. "I'll use 'em Dad, I promise. You'll see." Finally won over, the father paid for the equipment and headed for the door. From the corner of the store he heard his son yelp, "What! You mean I have to carry them to the car?"

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Ice Age is coming
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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