Dear Webby: Why Google's gmail 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Monday,  July 28, 2008

They always talk who never think. --- Matthew Prior No tyranny is so irksome as petty tyranny: the officious demands of policemen, government clerks, and electromechanical gadgets. --- Edward Abbey
Dave went on a business trip for a few days. When he returned, his wife reported that the dog really missed him. "She spent every night at the front door, awaiting your return," she said. "What an example of true love," Dave replied. "I wondered sometimes if you'd be that concerned about me" "Honey," she answered, hefting the frying pan, "if you were gone overnight, and I didn't know where you were, you can be sure I'd be waiting for you at the front door."
Caribou at Prudhoe Bay are in favor of drilling.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Birgit Mahler, 33, of Sonthofen, germany Shoplifter left daughter behind A German shoplifter who ran off with expensive cosmetics was caught after leaving her six-year-old daugher behind. Birgit Mahler, 33, stuffed the cosmetics worth $160 in her handbag and left the shop in the German city of Sonthofen without paying. But a security tag set off an alarm, and as soon as she heard it, Mahler ran off down the road before staff could react. A police spokesman said: "She showed staff a clean pair of heels, but she forgot about her six-year-old daughter who was left standing alone wondering where her mother had gone." Store staff called police and they collected the child together with a social worker. The spokesman added: "The girl's father turned up to report the child missing and seemed genuinely surprised to hear how his daughter had been lost. "We took down the details of the mother and have arranged to interview her over the incident." ... rangecrime
From Mary: Dear Webby, do you remember that joke about a drunk beating up a ghost? I need it, can you please run it again? Thanks Mary Sure, Mary! A modest man was in the hospital for a series of test. One of the last tests has left his system upset. Upon making several false alarms to the bathroom he decided the latest was another. But he completely filled his bed up with human waste and was embarrassed beyond anything he could possible face. Losing his presence of mind, he jumped up, gathered up the bed sheets and threw them out the hospital window. A drunkard was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cussing and swinging his arms which drew the attention of the security guard. The security guard asked, "What's going on here?!?!?" And the drunk replied, "I think I just beat the crap out of a ghost!"
In case you missed the link yesterday: Step By Step PC Tune-Up From the Tech Support Pits: From: Renee Re: Yahoo mail problems Hi Webby, I have the same problem as Brian (7/27/08 tech support question), which happened just a couple weeks ago. The page I receive is blank. I have to click your link in the left column to get your humor letter. Could you also send me a referral to gmail? What is gmail? I love your humor letter. Thank you for all your hard work in putting it together for us to enjoy. Thank you and have a happy day, Renee Dear Renee Gmail (Google Mail) is mail run by Google, instead of by the the silly yahoos (Yuppie Artsy Hebrew Oddball Opportunists). Like everything at Google, gmail works reliably and predictably. You can use gmail as WebMail, or you can use it with professional POP email programs like Eudora, Pegasus, or semi-professional POP programs like Outlook, Outlook Express, etc. You can continue to use Yahoo for cybersex, groups or whatever you use it for. You will just have a new and additional email address, and a mail system that works reliably and predictably. Have FUN! DearWebby

Todd and Jill had just gotten back from the honeymoon, and were having their first fight, and it was a big one. No matter what Todd tried to say or do, Jill refused to compromise, or even listen. He started growing exasperated. After a while, Todd said "When we got married, you promised to love, honor and obey." Jill replied, "I know. But I didn't want to start an argument in front of all those people at the wedding."

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Supermarket Mistakes Watch the display screen at the register as your groceries are being rung up. If you are overcharged, speak up. Before you leave the store, double check the receipt and make sure that the prices were correct. If you catch the mistake before you leave the store, you can quickly get a remedy at the service desk. Visit ThriftyFun For Grocery Shopping Tips By Clicking Here ... 6_945.html Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

Joe was delivering a load of manure to the convent and remarked to the friar about the beautiful roses they had. The friar told him that there would be a lot more and bigger roses, but that they were suffering from "Black Death". Joe had never heard of that and asked what this "Black Death" was all about. "Nuns with scissors," the friar replied.

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: What's The State of Your Air Bay of Fundy
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from
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