Dear Webby: Remove antivirus 2009 



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Good Morning,  !
It's Sunday,  August 10, 2008

A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic. --- Joseph Stalin Computer dating is fine, if you’re a computer. --- Rita Mae Brown Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all. --- Socratex
Two older gentleman were talking and one said to the other, "You're having an anniversary soon, right?" The other replied, "Yup, a big one... 20 years." "Wow," said the other, "what are you going to get your wife for your anniversary?" The other replied, "We're going on a trip to Australia." "Wow, Australia, that's some gift!" said the other man. "That's going to be hard to beat. What are you going to do for your 25th anniversary?" "Go back and get her."
Thanks to Eric for sendng this picture: This restaraunt owner in China used an online translation site to translate the name of his shop for the Olympics.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Teah Limitone, 22, of Seminole, Florida Nude passenger leads to five-car crash SEMINOLE, Fla. (UPI) -- Authorities in Seminole, Fla., said a five-car wreck was caused by a motorist who was distracted by a naked woman changing clothes in her back seat. Pinellas County sheriff's deputies said Teah Limitone, 22, was traveling north in the middle lane of Seminole Boulevard when she heard her changing passenger, Ayla Gabriel, make a distressed-sounding noise, the St. Petersburg (Fla.) Times reported. The deputies said Limitone turned her head to see if Gabriel was alright and ran a red light while she was not looking at the nude Ayla instead of the road. Limitone's 2003 Acura struck a 2000 Saturn in the intersection before sliding between two cars in the southbound lanes and striking a fourth vehicle. Deputies said Limitone was issued a citation for running a red light after the July 21 incident. No serious injuries were reported.
A modern Orthodox Jewish couple, Preparing for a religious wedding Meets with their rabbi for counseling. The rabbi asks if they have any last questions before they leave. The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition For men to dance with men, and Women to dance with women at the reception. But we'd like your permission to dance together, like the rest of the world. "Absolutely not," says the rabbi. "It's immodest. Men and women always dance separately." "So after the ceremony I can't even dance with my own wife?" "No," answered the rabbi. "It's forbidden." "Well, okay," says the man, "What about sex? Can we finally have sex?" "Of course!" replies the rabbi. "Sex is a mitzvah a good thing within marriage, To have children!" "What about different positions?" Asks the man "No problem," says the rabbi "It's a mitzvah!" "Woman on top?" the man asks. "Sure," says the rabbi. "Go for it! It's a mitzvah!" "Doggy style?" "Sure! Another mitzvah!" "On the kitchen table?" "Yes, yes! A mitzvah!" "Can we do it on rubber sheets With a bottle of hot oil, A couple of vibrators, A leather harness, A bucket of honey and a porno video?" "You may indeed. It's all a mitzvah!" "Can we do it standing up?" "No." says the rabbi." "Why not?" asks the man. "Could lead to dancing!"
Morty and Saul, are out one afternoon on a lake when their boat starts sinking. Saul the banker says to Morty, "So listen, Morty, you know I don't swim so well." Morty remembered how to carry another swimmer from his lifeguard class when he was just a kid. So Morty is begins tugging Saul toward shore. After twenty minutes, he begins to tire. Finally about 50 feet from shore, Morty asks Saul, "So Saul, do you suppose you could float alone?" Saul replies, "Morty, this is a hell of a time to be asking for money!"
Still available! Step By Step PC Tune-Up From the Tech Support Pits: From: Dianne Re: antivirus 2009 If you get a PopUp that mentions antivirus 2009, don't click Yes, and don't click No. Close it, shut down or pull the plug. But don't click anywhere in that pop-up. It is ransom ware, they demand money to get rid of it. Dianne Dear Dianne antivirus2009 is a clone of antivirus2008 and just as difficult to remove, if you don't have top tier protection. The least painful removal is with Anti-Malware from Malwarebytes Have FUN! DearWebby

The priest was instructing a class of third-graders at All Saints grammar school. "There were two brothers, and one of them chose the wicked path of Satan. The brother was evil and corrupt and did great damage to many people, and wound up a convicted criminal. "But the other brother studied hard and became a successful, knowledgeable lawyer. "Now, children, what is the difference between these two brothers, who both started out in the same place?" Little Johnny raised his hand and said, "Easy. One of them got caught."

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at http://fire-cat.com/blog/ Email to the Express Empress at 080801@fire-cat.com, and she will post it into the blog for you.
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Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Shopping for Back To School Supplies Take stock of what school supplies you already have, check that against the list provided by the school. Most schools now post their school supply lists online and at office supply stores. You can find great deals on school supplies after school starts when stores mark down their leftover stock. Visit ThriftyFun for more Back To School Tips by clicking here http://www.thriftyfun.com/Back%20To%20School_2.html Visit ThriftyFun For More Summer Fun Tips http://www.thriftyfun.com/Parenting_Sum ... _4980.html Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:

A cute young woman was giving a manicure to a man in the barber shop. The man said, "How about a date later?" "I'm married," she answered. With a wink he said, "So, just tell him you're going out with your girlfriends." "Tell him yourself," she said, "he's shaving you."

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Old cars and trucks
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from Webby.com
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