Dear Webby: Pirated XP 

   Zoom the font size for best readability!
Good Morning,  !
It's Sunday,  August 31, 2008

Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example. --- Francois de La Rochefoucauld The average person thinks he isn't. --- Father Larry Lorenzoni
A minister opening his mail one morning takes a sheet of paper from an envelope and finds written on it only one word: "FOOL." The next Sunday he announces, "I have known many people who have written letters and forgotten to sign their names. But this week I received a letter from someone who signed his name but forgot to write a letter."
Thanks to Cookie for sending this picture: Goin' to church
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to a man named Xu in Fuqing City, China Divine lightning reaction? A Chinese man who swore to God that he didn't owe money to a neighbour was hit by lightning a minute later. The man, named Xu, made the oath in front of a crowd of neighbours in Fuqing city, reports Southeast Express. He vowed that he had never borrowed money from Mr Huang, who claimed Xu borrowed 500 yuan, the equivalent of $75, from him three years earlier. "He borrowed 500 yuan three years ago from me for a friend's marriage gift, but he has denied it ever since then," said Huang, who went to Xu's home to demand payment. "I told him that if he dared to swear to God that he didn't owe me the money, then I would waive his debt," said Huang. Xu made the oath, but was suddenly struck by lightning a minute later. He was immediately taken to hospital where doctors confirmed he had been hit by lightning. He is expected to make a full recovery. ------------------- That sure would revolutionize election cmpaigns if we could get that happening here!
A woman had gained a few pounds. It was most noticeable to her when she squeezed into a pair of her old blue jeans. Wondering if the added weight was noticeable to everyone else, she asked her husband, "Honey, do these jeans make me look like the side of the house?" "No, dear, not at all," he replied, "Our house isn't blue."
A new hair salon opened up for business right across the street from the old established hair cutters' place. They put up a big bold sign which read: "WE GIVE SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS!" Not to be outdone, the old Master Barber put up his own sign: "WE FIX SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Sandra Re:Pirated XP Dear Webby, Additionally, Microsoft when it does updates adds a tracking system that will not allow you to get some updates, it has also in the past set a balloon in your icon tray by the clock to annoy the illegal users. There is a way to disable that too. You know I had an illegal copy when my system was built for me. You also know that I went out and purchased a legal XP when I could afford it after 3 years. ... Just thought I would pass this along too. In my opinion, I think they are not concerned of the past items, but are after the big fish that sell the pirated versions. I would not want to try and run an unlicensed copy in a business these days. Lots of people cannot afford the legal version, that is the sad truth, so they opt for free or cheaper copies of software. At least you have given them a way to get around it with the suggestion of the Linux system. Have a good day... Sandra Dear Sandra Yes, especially for a business it is not a good idea at all to use a pirated XP. Even though it may work quite OK, sooner or later some employee will brag or complain about it. Have FUN! DearWebby

It was Little Johnny's first day in a new school, so his father looked up the teacher. He told her that Little Johnny was a good kid but that he was a hell of a gambler. He warned her that Little Johnny might win lunch money from the other kids if he was not watched closely. The teacher did not seem disturbed, she assured the father that she had handled many such problems and was very capable of taking care of Little Johnny's urge to gamble. Shortly after lunch, Little Johnny's father called the teacher and asked her how things were going. "Oh, everything is going very well," she said, "I think I may have cured Little Johnny of his gambling habit." The father asked her what had happened. "Little Johnny absolutely insisted on betting me ten dollars that I had a mole on my rear," she said, "I finally agreed to the bet and took him to the teacher's lounge to show him that I had no mole." "Damn!" His father said. "He bet me fifty dollars this morning that he would have your pants down before the day was over!"

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Keeping the Toothpaste Tube Clean For a clean tube, try squeezing from the bottom. Then put the cap back on the toothpaste tube and roll up the empty tube as you use it. When you squeeze the tube from the bottom, more of the excess toothpaste is sucked back into the tube. Click Here For More ThriftyFun Tips Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

Each evening bird lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl - and one night, an owl finally called back to him. For a year, the man and his feathered friend hooted back and forth. He even kept a log of the "conversation"... Just as he thought he was on the verge of a breakthrough in interspecies communication, his wife had a chat with her next door neighbor. "My husband spends his nights calling out to owls," she said. "That's odd," the neighbor replied. "So does my husband!"

Thanks to Sandie for today's Bonus Link: Wonder Ho To ?
If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from
For more ezines, check the Ezine Directory: The Ezine Directory Top 20 Ezines

[ view entry ] ( 218 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 2.9 / 531 )

<<First <Back | 128 | 129 | 130 | 131 | 132 | 133 | 134 | 135 | 136 | 137 | Next> Last>>