Dear Webby: Beware of XP Antivirus08 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Sunday,  September 7, 2008

Pay no attention to what the critics say; there has never been set up a statue in honor of a critic. --- Jean Sibelius
Thanks to Gloria for this classic: A 5 year old's first job... Here's a truly heartwarming story about the bond Formed between a little 5-year-old girl and some Construction workers that will make you believe That we all can make a difference when we give A child the gift of our time. A young family moved into a house, next to a Vacant lot. One day, a construction crew began To build a house on the empty lot. The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an Interest in the goings-on and spent much of Each day observing the workers. Eventually the construction crew, all of them 'gems-in-the-rough,' more or less, adopted her As a kind of project mascot. They chatted with Her during coffee and lunch breaks and gave her Little jobs to do here and there to make her feel Important. At the end of the first week, they even Presented her with a pay envelope containing ten Dollars. The little girl took this home to her Mother who suggested that she take her ten Dollars 'pay' she'd received to the bank the next Day to start a savings account. When the girl and her mom got to the bank, the Teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl How she had come by her very own pay check at Such a young age. The little girl proudly replied, 'I worked last week with a real construction crew Building the new house next door to us.' 'Oh my goodness gracious,' said the teller, 'and will You be working on the house again this week, too?' The little girl replied, 'I will, if those a*******es at Home Depot ever deliver the f _ ckin' sheet rock.'
Thanks to Dianne for sending this picture:
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Michael Fabricant, 58, of Staffordshire, England Not worth a ransom Amy Beeman - AHN London, England (AHN) -- A British politician had a scare recently when armed Colombian soldiers mistakenly took his powdered coffee-mate to be raw cocaine. Michael Fabricant, 58, who represents the Staffordshire constituency of Lichfield and Burntwood, was on a trekking vacation in South America when he and his friend ran into a group of soldiers in the jungle. The gun-wielding militants searched their belongings and found an unlabeled jar of powdered coffee creamer. Fabricant told reporters he tried to explain what it was, but spoke very little Spanish. So the soldiers, armed with M16 rifles forced Fabricant to eat several spoonfuls of the white substance. Ingesting large quantities of raw cocaine is poisonous and can cause death. While Fabricant told the press he felt ill from so much of the powder, the fact that he didn't show any signs of sickness convinced the group of militants that the substance was not cocaine, and they allowed Fabricant and his friend to continue their hike. Fabricant said he brought the powdered creamer because he wasn't sure what the quality of milk would be in Colombia. Apparently they realized it would be hopeless trying to get a ransom for somebody like him.
One morning the door-bell rang. The weather was very bad. It was raining cats and dogs. I opened the door and there stood a young lady, a Jehovah's Witness, soaking wet. I felt sorry for her and invited her in the house for a cup of coffee and to dry off a little. As we were drinking our coffee, I asked what her ' happy message ' was. I thought we might discuss some minor or major differences of believes or interpretation, but, she stuttered and said: ..."I'm not sure....I never got this far before...!"
Tom had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which one should have the present. "Who is the most obedient?" he asked. "Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?" Five small and sad voices answered in unison. "Okay, dad, you get the toy."
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Trish Re: Antivirus 2008 Dear Webby, HELP!!!!! My computer seems to have been affected by something. The only thing I've done recently is update my Microsoft messenger. Since then I have balloon pop ups continuously saying my XP Antivirus 2008 is inactive or threats detected or some critical files have been . . . . .etc etc. If I click on the balloon it wants me to register 'and pay I think for XP Antivirus 2008, doesn't look like a 'proper' windows update site, similar but not the same. How do I get rid of this or at least stop it. I have Trend PC-Cillin Internet Security which tells me all is well, it came with the computer. I will be going back to AVG when time is up and that's soon. Thanks a lot if you have any answers Trish Dear Trish XP Antivirus 2008 is a trojan infection. Yep, your computer is not under your control any more. Some guy in Russia controls it now. XP antivirus 2008 is actually quite evil shit, and according to what I read, not that easy to get rid off. It has been around for a long time and all but the very worst anti-virus programs block it from coming onto your computer via that fake MSN update. There is a fair bit of information about it on the net: XP Antivirus 2008 By the way, since you paid for Trend Micro PC-Cillin, I would screech a hostile temper tantrum at them and make them step you through removing it. Have FUN! DearWebby Hello again I really am worried now about the previouse email I sent re 'XP Antivirus 2008', I can't go to any website as "I am not covered by XP Antivirus 2008 and it may be dangerous to my computer". Thanks again if you can shed some light on this problem. Trish Dear Trish Sounds like the hackers that control your computer now are busy using your computer for a DDOS attack, and don't want you to slow them down. 1) Get the support number for Trend Micro 2) Screech a temper tantrum at them 3) Get them to step you through the process of getting rid of that infection, that they failed to protect you from 4) Un-install TrendMicro 5) Get McAfee Virus Scan for about $30 a YEAR or any decent protection in that class. Have FUN! DearWebby

Two golden-agers were discussing their husbands over lunch. "I do wish that my John would stop biting his nails. He makes me terribly nervous." My Fred used to do the same thing," the other woman replied. "But I broke him of the habit." "Really, how?" asked the first woman. "Easy, I hid his teeth."

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Herbs to Prevent Insects Some herbs can help prevent insects from damaging other plants. For example, anise and coriander discourage aphids. Contact your local nursery or agricultural college extension to find out which herbs will work best in your area. Visit ThriftyFun For More Green Living Tips Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:  

There are three truths in religion: 1. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.... 2. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christians 3. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters.
Interesting facts about Obama and Palin

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: The Hubble Site - The Entire Collection
ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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