Dear Webby: Clipboard 

   Zoom the font size for best readability!
Good Morning,  !
It's Saturday,  September 20, 2008

Perhaps in time the so-called Dark Ages will be thought of as including our own. --- Georg Christoph Lichtenberg
"The body consists of three parts - the branium, the borax, and the abominable cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."

If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Muhammad al-Munajid, a Saudi Cleric Sent in by Deeli Scared of Mickey Mouse September 19, 2008 - Riyadh, Saudi Arabia - UPI A Saudi sheik has declared Disney animated icon Mickey Mouse "a soldier of Satan" who "should be killed in all cases." Islamic cleric Muhammad al-Munajid, a former diplomat who once served at the Saudi Embassy in Washington, said during an interview with al-Majd Television that Islamic law declares the mouse as "a repulsive, corrupting creature" and he condemned cartoons that glorify rodents, including Mickey Mouse, Ynetnews reported Tuesday. "Mickey Mouse has become an awesome character, even though according to Islamic law, Mickey Mouse should be killed in all cases," al-Munajid said. "The shari'a (Islamic religious law) refers to the mouse as 'little corrupter,' and says it is permissible to kill it in all cases. It says that mice set fire to the house, and are steered by Satan. The mouse is one of Satan's soldiers," he said. Copyright 2008 by United Press International ------------------------- Personally, I think he is just scared of mice and embarrassed that he shrieks and jumps onto the table, when he sees one, just like a lot of little girls do.
A university student was told by his dentist that he would have to have his wisdom teeth removed. Concerned about the expense, he consulted his roommate. "I'm not sure I can afford to have my wisdom teeth pulled," he complained. "I know," his friend replied seriously. "I've seen your SATs."
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Robert Re: Where is the Clipboard Dear Webby, Of all the years I've used a Computer, I don't know what the Clipboard is used for nor can I locate it. I ran a test and they said it was posted to my clipboard and I should copy the results and paste the results when sending to my ISP. Where is it? I always appreciate the advice and daily Humor. Take Care & Thank You Dear Robert The clipboard is a scratch pad in RAM. If you highlight a paragraph and hit CTRL C, that paragraph is in the clipboad. When you hit CTRL V, whatever is in the clipboard is pasted wherever the cursor is. The clipboard is not limited to text. I can copy a picture in PSP, jump to the email and hit CTRL V. The picture is then pasted into the email. That might not work with all email programs, but with Eudora it has worked fine since about '93. The clipboard is also indispensable when you work in spreadsheets. Highlight a cell or range of cells, hit CTRL C to copy, drop down to a different layer in 3D layered spreadsheets, put the cursor where you want what you copied, hit CTRL V and it is pasted. You can copy / paste from email to spreadsheets or word processors or graphics programs or web page editors and back. All of that is handled by the clipboard. You can even hit PrintScreen and copy whatever is on the screen into the clipboard, for example a cute picture in a screen saver. Then jump to a graphics program, hit CTRL V and paste the screen capture as a picture. The clipboard is a one shot deal. Whatever you copied last, is in it. You can paste it as often as you want, UNTIL you copy something else. The moment you copy something else, the previous copy is gone, forever. The clipboard is just in RAM, not on your hard drive. To see what is in the clipboard, hit CTRL V to paste it. To erase that naughty picture that you had just copied and pasted elsewhere, copy a comma or period from some text. Yep, a single period will totally obliterate and replace a 5 MB picture. When you reboot or shut down, the clipboard also gets dumped. There are programs available that let you copy a whole series of shots, but they are memory hogs and usually not worth the hassle. Have FUN! DearWebby

Some people will bet on anything - as long as they're convinced it's a Sure Thing. One afternoon at the race track, an inveterate bettor of this sort, who was known to his buddies as "Sure Thing Sherm," noticed a Catholic priest entering the stable area with one of the owners. Shadowing them, our Sherman watched as the clergyman blessed a beautiful thoroughbred. When the horse next raced, it came in first! Paying close attention, Sherm began to realize that this happened quite often. After checking out this phenomenon very carefully for a few days, "Sure Thing" began betting only on horses that had been blessed; and he did very well. Finally, he decided he could risk his life's savings. He drew out everything he had, monitored the priest's comings and goings like a scholar, and put his entire wad on a longshot, to win. You guessed it: That particular horse not only did not win, he came in last - dead last. Horrified and heart-broken, Sherman sought out the priest and begged him to tell him what had gone wrong. The padre sighed, then explained: "Ah, what a pity. That's the trouble, you see, with not being able to tell the difference between a Blessing and the Last Rites."

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Fix Dings Before They Become Cracks You can save yourself from having to replace your car windshield down the road by getting dings repaired in a timely matter. If you have comprehensive auto insurance, these repairs may be covered and they often waive your deductible so the repair is essentially free. Visit ThriftyFun For More Auto Tips Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:Share & Compare Your MPG  

Thanks to Darlene for this story: Two Newfies look at a Sears' Catalogue and admire the models. One says to the other: "Have you seen the beautiful girls in this catalogue?" The second replies. "Yes, they are darn beautiful! And look at the price!" The first says, with wide eyes, "Wow, they're not very expensive. At this price, I'm buying one." The second smiles and claps him on the back, "Good idea, order one and if she is as beautiful as in the catalogue, I'll get one too." Three weeks later, the Newfie asks his chum "Did you ever receive the girl you ordered from the Sears' catalogue?" The second replies, "No. But it shouldn't be long now.... I got her underwear yesterday!"

Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Carribean Coral Reefs

ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

[ view entry ] ( 159 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3 / 659 )

<<First <Back | 127 | 128 | 129 | 130 | 131 | 132 | 133 | 134 | 135 | 136 | Next> Last>>