Dear Webby: Flexible keyboard 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Wednesday,  November 5, 2008

I think age is a very high price to pay for maturity. --- Tom Stoppard Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once. --- Tallulah Bankhead
Thanks to Sandie for this story: Recently, I called to make reservations on a small charter plane that departs from the Teterboro airport in New Jersey. I knew I would be flying in a very small plane, so I wasn't surprised when the clerk said, "The plane is very full with baggage and passengers." Then she asked, "How much do you weigh, Ma'am?" Not thinking clearly, I answered, "With or without clothes?" "Well," said the clerk, "how do you intend to travel?"
When my sister teased her four-year-old daughter by suggesting she liked a certain boy in her kindergarten class, the little girl was quite indignant. "No mommy, I don't," she replied, "because he's only interested in one thing." Shocked, my sister cautiously asked what that might be. "Pokemon cards, of course," said the toddler.
Thanks to Lillemor for sending this picture:
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Conrad Torres, 51 of Bakersfield, California near suicidal bravery When two 17-year-old girls hopped into his truck and tried to drive off Monday night, Conrad Torres, 51, jumped in the bed, thinking he could stop them. They took off, reaching 85 miles per hour with Torres in the back. He managed to break the rear window and stick his head in the cab, but one girl hit him in the head with a baseball bat. They started swerving the truck, trying to throw him out. “I was just praying that nobody would hit us,” Torres said. A California Highway Patrol officer pursued them. Eventually, the girls took a turn badly, hit a telephone pole and rolled the truck at East Belle Terrace and Madison Street. Torres was thrown out of the back and hit his back on the pole. The girls were arrested on suspicion of carjacking, kidnapping, assault with a deadly weapon and car theft, Officer Greg Williams said. The girls were identified as Lizet Cuellar and Rosanna Contreras of Bakersfield, the Kern County Probation Department said. They are in Juvenile Hall pending a review of the case by the District Attorney’s office, a probation officer said. It began at 10:15 p.m. at P Street and Ming Avenue where Torres backed his Ford F250 pickup out of a work site, Williams said. He left the truck running as he went to close a gate. The girls jumped in and locked the doors, Williams said. Torres climbed into the bed and began to pound on the back window. As the truck was going north on P Street, a CHP cruiser spotted the commotion. The officer saw Torres banging on the back window and one of the girls hitting him with a club. The officer backed off the chase because it got too dangerous, and a short time later the truck overturned, Williams said. “Even when you’re right there, it’s not a good idea to leave a vehicle running,” Williams said.
When I went to get my driver's license renewed, our local Motor Vehicle Bureau was packed. The line inched along for almost an hour until the man ahead of me finally got his license. He inspected his photo for a moment and commented to the clerk, "I was standing in line so long, I ended up looking pretty grouchy in this picture." The clerk looked at his picture closely, and reassured him, "It's okay. That's how you're going to look when the cops pull you over anyway."
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Robert Re: Flexible Keyboard Dear Webby I travel extensively with a laptop/portable and HATE the keyboards. Also a lot of the stuff I do is in "difficult" environments in one way or the other. They plug in via USB, very simple. I have found the flexible keyboards (available all over now) to be just wonderful. They roll up to a wee package for shipping, handle any surface without sliding around, and the occasional spill (eg turbulence on flight) doesn't affect at all. I have had a wee bit of problem with other people thinking they need the thing more than me, but since I changed to bright pink colour this problem has gone away! What I would like to know, if you or readers can help: is there an equivalent "rubber" mouse/touchpad, as the touchpad on portable not my favourite either! Regards, Robert BC Dear Robert My fix for the moronic touch pad is to cut a piece of plastic from a flat bottle to precisely fit into the touchpad slot.. On the once every 7 year occasion, when I don't want to unpack the keyboard and mouse, I pull the plastic out. For regular usage, I use the same optical 5 button Intellimouse Explorer as on the desktop. It works fine on hotel beds, truck tail gates, just about anything except mirrors. I use the cheap corded type, not the heavy wireless type, that requires you to also carry the transmitter for it. If you don't do fine graphics, you can use a track-ball. They make some really small ones too, and some people claim they like them. The main advantage of the track-balls is in cramped aircraft seats. While my mouse works fine on my hairy legs, that takes the hand too far away from the keyboard. Have FUN! DearWebby

Thanks to Rick for this classic: *Possessed Computer?* For a computer programming class, I sat directly across from someone, and our computers were facing away from each other. A few minutes into the class, she got up to leave the room. I reached between our computers and switched the inputs for the keyboards. She came back and started typing and immediately got a distressed look on her face. She called the teacher over and explained that no matter what she typed, nothing would happen. The teacher tried everything. By this time I was hiding behind my monitor and quaking red-faced. I started to type, "Leave me alone!" They both jumped back, silenced. "What the . . . " the teacher said. I typed, "I said leave me alone!" The kid got real upset. "I didn't do anything to it, I swear!" It was all I could do to keep from laughing out loud. The conversation between them and HAL 2000 went on for an amazing five minutes. Me: "Don't touch me!" Her: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hit your keys that hard." Me: "Who do you think you are anyway?!" Etc. Finally, I couldn't contain myself any longer and fell out of my chair laughing. After they had realized what I had done, they both turned beet red. Funny, I never got more than a C- in that class.

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Daily tip from Removing "Permanent" Creases from Clothing White vinegar can be effective for removing permanent creases on types of clothing like washable slacks and jeans. Apply white vinegar liberally to the crease and then press with a warm iron. Visit ThriftyFun For More Laundry Tips Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

I don't think I'll ever have a mother's intuition. My sister left me alone in a restaurant with my 12-month-old nephew. I said, "What do I do if he cries?" She said, "Give him some vegetables." It turns out that jalapenos are not his favorite.
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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