Dear Webby: Vista Problem 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Thursday,  April 9, 2009

History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon. --- Napoleon Bonaparte Anything too stupid to be said is sung. --- Voltaire
One day this old lady walks into the doctors office and is shown into a room. When the doctor comes in and asks what the problem is she answers, "I have awful gas, but it doesn't bother me. You see, it's completely silent, and doesn't smell at all." So the doctor, after examining her thoroughly gives her some pills and tells her to take one everyday and come back in a week. So the old lady comes back, and when the doctor asks if her problem is any better she replies, "Well I don't know what you gave me but now my gas smells terribly!" The doctor replies "Well now that we've got your sinuses cleared up let's work on your hearing!"'
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church,just jokes and fun for adults.
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Sign at the church: Parking is for Church patrons only. Violators will be baptized.
Thanks to Dianne for this picture: Grass Mud Horses grazing
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to a 19 year old drunk in Alice Springs, Australia Driving while drunk and breastfeeding Police in Australia arrested a teenage mum - for breastfeeding while driving her car. Just before she was pulled over in Alice Springs, the 19-year-old mum almost crashed into a police car, reports The Sun. She was so drunk she couldn't give a breath test - and already banned from driving from a previous offence. Apart from driving while disqualified, the woman was also driving an unregistered and uninsured vehicle. Northern Territory Duty Superintendent Jamie Chalker said police were "absolutely outraged". He said: "A five-month-old child was placed at significant risk, and had the police officers not been able to brake to avoid the collision, then the outcome could've been even horrific." Supt Chalker said this was the first time he had ever heard of a mother being caught driving while breastfeeding. "It just challenges the mind that people can choose to be so flippant about road laws and people's lives, particularly their young children," he said. The baby was placed in the care of relatives. The young mum was charged with failing to provide a breath sample, driving while disqualified in an unregistered and uninsured car, failing to give way and driving with an unrestrained child.
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Duane Re: Vista problem Hi Webby, I have Vista home and even thouth my recycle bin is empty, I keep getting the pop up that I am running low on space and the file needs emptying. What can I do to turn it off?? Thanks, Duane Dear Duane For all Vista problems, contact M$ I don't allow Vista onto any Webby computers, and have no experience with it. Have FUN! DearWebby
Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe, and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it, and he'll have to touch to be sure. ---------------------------------- To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a commitee.

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Party Idea: Garden Themed Potato Bar Fill an oval tin ice bucket with hot baked potatoes. Use different containers such as a decorative flower pot to hold shredded cheese, use the flower pot saucers to hold the bacon bits or another condiment. Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

Two soldiers are late returning from their leave, and now they're standing before their sergeant: "How could you be late for two whole hours? What if a war broke out?" "Well, Sergeant, we went to the opera and we just got carried away with the performance." "Opera?!" the sergeant exclaims. "I know you turkeys got good and drunk, but I doubt you got drunk enough on YOUR salary to wind up in the opera!"
Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: Dunes
ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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