Dear Webby: How to save all pictures 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Monday,  May 18, 2009

If God lived on earth, people would break his windows. --- Jewish Proverb A newspaper consists of just the same number of words, whether there be any news in it or not. --- Henry Fielding
A protestant moved into a completely Catholic community. Being good Catholics they welcomed him into their community. But, also because they were good Catholics, they did not eat red meat on Fridays. So, when their neighbor began barbecuing some juicy steak on Friday nights, they began to squirm. They were so annoyed that they went to talk to him about it. After much talk they convinced him to become Catholic. The next Sunday he went to the priest and the priest sprinkled holy water on him and said: You were born Protestant. You were raised Protestant. But now you are Catholic. And so, the next Friday, as the neighbors sat down to eat their fish, they were disturbed by the smell of roast beef coming from the neighboring house. They went over to talk to the new Catholic because he knew he was not supposed to eat beef on Fridays. When they saw him, he was sprinkling BBQ sauce on the steak saying: You were born a cow. You were raised a cow. But now you are fish. -------- Yeah, I know it is an old joke and that Catholics can now eat meat on Fridays, just no oral sex. It's still a good joke, though.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church,just jokes and fun for adults.
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A bunch of guys decided one morning that they would go deer hunting. So they all piled into the station wagon with their guns and took off down the road looking for a place to go hunting. After driving awhile they came across an old farm house with a large spread of woods behind it. One of the guys went to the door and asked the farmer if they could hunt in his woods. When asked, the farmer said "Yes, sure, but would you do me a favor? The ol' bull in the corall there beside the house is on his last legs and I know he is sufferin', would you kindly put him down for me? I don' have the heart to." As the hunter walked back to the station wagon, he decided to play a prank on his fellow hunters. So when he got back to the station wagon he pulled out his rifle and said "..I'll teach that old coot for not letting us hunt on his property!" and shot the old bull. After he fired the shot, he heard another shot and another one, and one of the other hunters proclaim, "Yea, we'll show him... I got the cow and the calf, too!"
Thanks to my dad for this picture: He takes a cable car up some mountain, then hikes first walking trails then roads down into the valley. As long as he does that once or twice a week, he does not need any diabetes medicine, which would cost more per week than a regional season pass for a senior costs him. A region has about 50 different cable cars. Seems a fun way to save money. What is strange, though, is that he seems to be the only one in his region to do that.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to police in Warren, Michigan Police taser stuffed toy cougar WARREN, Mich. -- Warren police responded to a 911 call about a cougar on the prowl. "It's huge; it's like a 150-pound cat," the caller told the operator. Approximately 10 officers arrived at Bates Park on 14 Mile Road east of Van Dyke and saw what looked like a big cat in an old cement drainpipe. "And I went back behind there and shined a light there -- and it's in there," said the caller. Warren police shot a Taser at the animal -- hitting what turned out to be a large toy cougar. Police Commissioner William Dwyer said officials now believe the incident was a prank, but he said his department could not take any chances since it was near a playground.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Yolanda Re: Save all pictures Dear Webby, My dingbat sister got her computer so messed up, that only a complete format will fix it. She WANTS to be organized, and puts everything into their own categories and folders, but then forgets she already has a dozen similar categories with slightly different spellings or abbreviations, and she also has a lot of duplicates. Is there a fast and easy way to dump all pictures into one huge folder, that I can drag onto a DVD? Thanks Yolanda Dear Yolanda Yes, just click START, SEARCH and tell it to look for all .jpg files. When that is done, hot CTRL A to select all, and drag them to the DVD. Then do the same with .gif and .png She probably also has a lot of PPS and PPT presentations, and a ton of little movies. Again, do exactly the same. You COULD drag the stuff into a new folder on the computer, but in that case use SHIFT drag, otherwise you make one more duplicate, and might not have room for it all. Have FUN! DearWebby
Linda went into the local bookstore and saw this big display with a sign saying "Newly Translated from the Original French: 37 Mating Positions." Noticing the books were already wrapped in plain brown paper, she just had to buy one. Once safely at home, she opened it and found that she had just purchased a very expensive book about chess.

The Express Empress and her Outlook Express tips are on a separate blog at Email to the Express Empress at, and she will post it into the blog for you.
Daily tip from Satisfy Sweet Cravings With Dried Fruit Satisfy your sweet tooth with simple candied fruit available at your grocers. Or make your own in your oven or dehydrator. By Melody_yesterday from Otterville, MO Don't get too carried away, though! Keep in mind that a pound of dried apples or apricots is the equivalent of 10-12 pounds of fruit, when it expands again in your somach. Be especially careful with fruits like dried strawberries. If you want somebody away from the computer and parked in the outhouse for a day, give them a bag of dried strawberries to pick on while they are at the computer. Dried fruit should be a rationed treat, not for absentminded snacking. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

A woman called in a repairman to fix her television. Just as he finished, the woman heard her husband's key in the lock. "Hurry," she said to the repairman, "you'll have to hide. My husband is insanely jealous." There was no time to run out the back door, so the repairman hid inside the TV console. The husband came in and plopped down in his favorite chair to watch some football. Inside the TV, the repairman was all squashed up and getting hotter and hotter. Finally, he couldn't stand it anymore. He climbed out, marched across the room and out the front door. The husband looked at the TV set, looked at his wife, looked back at the set again and said, "I didn't see the referee send that guy off the field, did you?
Q: What is the difference between a psychotic and a neurotic? A: A psychotic thinks that 2 plus 2 makes 5. A neurotic KNOWS that 2 plus 2 makes 4 -- but that is just not good enough for her. (or him)
Thanks to Dianne for today's Bonus Link: CSLR
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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