Dear Webby: Free windmill 

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It's Friday,  September 4, 2009
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

In the republic of mediocrity, genius is dangerous. --- Robert G. Ingersoll The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other. --- Will Rogers
A real estate salesman has just closed his first deal, only to discover that the piece of land he has sold is completely under water. "That customer is going to come back here pretty mad," he says to his boss. "Should I give him his money back?" "Money back?" the boss roars. "What kind of salesman are you? Get out there and sell him a houseboat!"
A wealthy woman is giving a garden party, and several well-to-do guests attend. While the party ensues, two gardeners are out on the back lawn working. One of the guests was watching the gardeners do their thing, and while one gardener was busy weeding the other jumped up and did graceful swirling dance movements. Taken by his grace, the guest remarked to the host, "That man is such a talented dancer, that I'd pay him a hundred pounds to demonstrate his dancing before my aerobics class!" When the host asked the first gardener about such an arrangement, he yelled, "Hey Fred! Do you think for a hundred pounds you could step on that short rake again?"
Thanks to Ross for this picture: Don't worry, it's just Scientists studying how to get grants.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Thomas Zeilinski, 22 in jail in Michigan Robber sues victims CLINTON TOWNSHIP, Mich. - The criminal is finding new and legal ways to victimize the people he ripped off and threatened to kill. "Ridiculous," says a loyal and longtime customer of Nick's Short Stop Party Store regarding 22-year-old Scott Thomas Zeilinski decision to sue the store owner and some of the clerks after he, Zeilinski, was shot during an armed robbery. Zeilinski is serving an 8-22 year sentence for the robbery that happened in November of 2007. According to police and court records, Zeilinski came in wearing a mask and carrying a knife that he put to the throats of several employees, threatening to kill them before stealing cigarettes and cash. As he was leaving--reportedly still making threats--one of the young clerks grabbed a gun and shot him in the arm and back. Zeilinski's lawyer says his client is asking in excess of $125,000 for pain and suffering and emotional distress. Since the robbery the store owner has spent thousands of dollars on security to keep his employees safe. He says he is hoping nothing like this ever happens again. Zelinski says the incident "ruined his life" and believes the store is responsible for it.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Sandra Re: Sunforce wind generator Dear Webby A friend sent me a link to and their offer of a free windmill. I know they are outright lying, when they claim that it "is also a great choice for powering pumps or charging batteries for large power demands", but I am wondering if it would charge my cell phone during power outages. You used to build windmills, so you should know. And would it be worth the hassle? Sandra Dear Sandra It MAY keep your phone charged, espeially since in your area power outages are usually due to high wind. If the wind is high enough, it may even power the pump in a small indoor aquarium. It is more decoration than anything else. However, a cutesy fence-topper like that is most definitely not worth the hassle of THAT site. That site requires you to surrender all your private information, AND participate in surveys, AND joining programs, AND buying all kinds of stuff you wouldn't buy otherwise. I didn't even finish reading all the requirements. I would not touch that deal with a ten foot pole on remote control! If you DO want a little 400 Watt fence topper, look on eBay. There are bound to be used ones available cheap. With small windmills, forget the claimed top output, that you MIGHT get once a century. 5% - 10% of what they claim as "up to", is a more realistic average, especially in an urban setting. Have FUN! DearWebby
My parents have a friend named Tex. One day I asked him what part of Texas he was from. "I'm not from Texas," he replied. "But you have a Southern drawl," I insisted. "Yeah, I do," he admitted. "I'm actually from Louisiana. But you better not call me Louise!"
Daily tip from Test New Plants Before Transplanting If you have little experience with a newly-purchased plant, try it out in its new spot for a few days still in its nursery pot. Be careful to keep it watered as the label directs, and watch it for signs of stress. The spot you've planned for it may not be right for that type of plant. By Cinnamon from Williams Lake, BC Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

The child was a typical four-year-old girl - cute, inquisitive, bright as a new penny. When she expressed difficulty in grasping the concept of marriage, her father decided to pull out his wedding photo album, thinking visual images would help. One page after another, he pointed out the smiling bride arriving at the church, the happily laughing bride at the entrance, the wedding ceremony, the recessional, the reception, etc. "Now do you understand?" he asked. "I think so," she said, "it's like halloween, right, but backwards. Mommy put on a nice disguise so that you would not see how scarey she really is. "
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for adults.
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After a long and arduous divorce trial that dragged on for weeks and cost him everything except the clothes he wore, on the way out of the court George was reminded of a phrase in an old song: "being free is nothing left to lose". He realized the truth in that and started laughing and shouting as he skipped down the sidewalk. "I'm free, I'm free!" he shouted. "So what," said a little girl. "I'm almoft four."
Earth cam
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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