Stop automatic Windows shutdowns 

Zoom the font size for best readability  
Good Morning,  !
It's Saturday,  October 31, 2009
Happy Halloween!

Painting, n. The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic. Formerly, painting and sculpture were combined in the same work: the ancients painted their statures. The only present alliance between the two arts is that the modern painter often chisels his patrons. --Ambrose Bierce's "Devil's Dictionary."
A wise schoolteacher sends this note to all parents: "If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I'll promise not to believe everything he says happens at home.
A grandmother came by to show off her brand-new Pontiac Grand Am. The eight-year-old granddaughter took one look at the car and indignantly proclaimed, "They spelled grandma wrong!"

If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Ryan Neal,19, Keanthony Strickland,19, and Gabriel Williams,18. in Dayton, Ohio Boobheads DAYTON, Ohio (UPI) -- Police in Ohio said a man suspected of armed robbery with three others wore a black bra to disguise his face during the crime. Dayton Police said an officer heard a gunshot while patrolling late Sunday and followed the sound to a man who said a group of men robbed him of $10 at gunpoint, WHIO-TV, Dayton, reported. Investigators tracked down the getaway car used in the crime and four men fled the vehicle on foot. Officers said they apprehended Ryan Neal,19, Keanthony Strickland,19, and Gabriel Williams,18. The fourth suspect evaded capture. Police said all four were wearing black masks and officers discovered a mask worn by one of the arrested suspects, who were held in connection with the robbery, was a bra wrapped around his head.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Brendt Re: Unwanted reboots Dear Webby How can I stop Windows from rebooting behind my back, just because it installed yet another bug fix and because it detected that I have some unsaved files open? Brendt Dear Brendt It's not just Windows. Adobe and many others are even worse. With Windows you can go into the Control Panel, select Automatic Updates, and select "Notify me but don't automatically download or install them". Occasionally, it will still do it anyway, but not nearly as often. Other programs, that keep popping reboot reminders and show a countdown timer bar, are often worse. With those you might as well throw in the towel, save everything and let it reboot. Otherwise they just keep annoying you until you do. Keep in mind that many programs have automatic saves that you can adjust. Just look in the Help for "auto-save", and set it for 2 minutes. With FireFox you can set it so that it saves all your open tabs and restarts with those tabs open. If you had a bunch of windopws open with movies or music, that produces some awful caterwauling, when all of them start playing simultaneously. Just mute the sound and hunt them down and stop each one. Have FUN! DearWebby
Sandy began a job as an elementary school counselor and she was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other. Sandy approached and asked if she was all right. The girl said she was. A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself. Approaching again, Sandy offered, "Would you like me to be your friend?" The girl hesitated, gave her a very suspicious look and then said, "Okay". Feeling she was making progress, Sandy then asked, "Why are you standing here all alone?" "Because," the little girl said with great exasperation, "I'm the goalie!"
Daily tip from Halloween Costume: Ghoulteacher For Halloween one year, I bought the ugliest dress I could find at the thrift store. It was a black sheath dress with yellow, white and gold shear collar and it was sleeveless. I wore black pantyhose and glued spiders and ants on the hose and dress. I had a fake rat that I pinned to my shoulder and my face was greened along with my arms and hands. I brushed out my hair with my head upside down and sprayed with the freeze type hairspray. I colored it with streaks of green. Maggie from Oak Lawn, IL Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

The finance committee of our church refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier, because none of the members knows how to play one.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for adults.
Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the confirmation request
. If you don't get it, then you, your mother or your ISP have Ophelia blocked
A third grade teacher asked her class: "I'd like you to be very quiet today. I've got a dreadful headache." "Excuse me," said , "why don't you do what my mom does when she has a hangover?" "What's that?" asked the teacher. "She sends us outside to play."

ARCHIVE: If you missed previous issues, you can see them in the Humor Letter Blog at
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!
Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

[ view entry ] ( 218 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3 / 536 )

<<First <Back | 114 | 115 | 116 | 117 | 118 | 119 | 120 | 121 | 122 | 123 | Next> Last>>