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Good Morning,  !
It's Friday,  December 18, 2009
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

"Children have more need of models than of critics." -- Joseph Joubert (1754-1824) "A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another's." -- Jean Paul Richter (1763-1825)
At a truck stop off I-40 in Arkansas about 2 o'clock in the morning, a trucker was having a cup of coffee and a piece of pie and was romancing the solitary waitress there. All of a sudden, three mean looking bikers came in. They observed the connection between the waitress and the trucker and started to make nasty and suggestive remarks trying to get the trucker to start something. But the trucker didn't say anything, just paid his bill and walked out. One of the bikers said to the waitress, "Looks like your boyfriend ain't much of a man." The waitress just leaned on the cash register and looked out the window and said, "Yeah, and he ain't much of a trucker either. He just ran his semi over three bikes out there."
Dave went on a business trip for a few days. When he returned, his wife reported that the dog really missed him. "She spent every night at the front door, waiting for you to come home," she said. "What an example of true love," Dave replied. "I wonder if you'd be that concerned about me?" "Honey," she answered, "if you were gone overnight, and I didn't know where you were, you can be sure me and my rolling pin would be waiting for you at the front door."
Thanks to Dianne for sending this picture:
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Radim Kopecky, 22, from the Czech Republic Man thanks judge for Xmas jail term A Czech man who threatened to carry on breaking the law so he could spend Xmas in jail thanked the judge who finally obliged him. Czech citizen Radim Kopecky, 22, told the court in Korneuburg, Austria, that life in jail - especially at Christmas - was much better than living as a free man in his home land. He was looking forward to having a roof over his head, the company of other convicts and regular meals. He said: "I came to Austria to get myself jailed. My life will be better now." He repeatedly stole and then turned himself in to Austrian cops each time - begging them to see he was sent to jail. Finally, he was sentenced to 16 months and two days in prison for stealing sweets worth 2. He told the court after he was sentenced: "I would like to say thank you very, very much dear judge for jailing me."
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Carolyn Re: Power Point Reader Dear Webby, my friend can not see any powerpoint presentations I send her in my email. I know I just downloaded a free one years ago. On your Web Tools you have something called PowerPoint Reader. If I send her this, could she download it free and then see the shows I send her? Which year is best to download? I have 2003. Should I download a newer version? I love what I have so probably best to leave it alone. Thanks for you help. I enjoy your letter so much and I continue to vote each day. Carolyn Dear Carolyn The Microsoft PowerPoint Reader in my Tool Box works OK. If it works fine for you, don't worry about downloading updates. It probably has been updated with the regular Windows Updates anyway. The one built into Open Office (Open Office is also in the Tool Box, it works even better, especially if she wants to snag the odd picture. That one opens in harvesting mode by default, and you hit F5 for auto-play. Have FUN! DearWebby
A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102. Already there is a long-time resident who looks 100 years old. The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly. The old-timer says, "Look at me. I'm old and worn out. You'd never believe that I used to live the life of Riley. I wintered on the Riviera, had a boat, four fine cars, the most beautiful women, and I ate in all the best restaurants of France." The new man asked, "What happened?" "One day Riley reported his credit cards missing!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Packing Peanuts in Plant Containers Like many others I use packing peanuts in my flower containers. I don't have to use as much potting soil, and it keeps my containers lighter. This year I went to go change out the soil in my biggest container. I had to hand pick out each peanut from the soil. What a chore! When I went to replace the peanuts this time, I put them in an onion net bag and tied the bag off. Next time I go to change out the potting soil it will be a snap! By Liz from New Baden, IL Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:

A trainee for the New York Police Department, was asked the following hypothetical question: "If your beat was a lonely path in Central Park, and a beautiful young girl rushed up to you and declared that a strange man had suddenly grabbed her, and hugged and kissed her, what would you do?" The police-officer-in-training replied without hesitation, "I would endeavor to reconstruct the crime."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from Webby.com

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