Humor: Spybot 

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It's Sunday, January 31, 2010

Spare no expense to save money on this one. --- Samuel Goldwyn Bureaucrats write memoranda both because they appear to be busy when they are writing and because the memos, once written, immediately become proof that they were busy. --- Charles Peters History is more or less bunk. --- Henry Ford
A preacher said to the farmer,"Do you belong to the Christian family ?" "No", he said, " they live two farms down ". "No,no, I mean are you lost ?" "No, I've been here thirty years." "I mean are you ready for Judgement Day?" "When is it ?" "It could be today or tomorrow ". "Well, when you find out for sure when it is , you let me know . My wife will probably want to go both days !"
A golf pro was helping this attractive young woman with her swing when his zipper got caught in the rhinestones on the back of her skirt. Needless to say this was embarrassing to both of them since their relationship had been purely platonic up to that point anyway. They decided to walk together in this lock-step back to the clubhouse where certainly a pair of needle-nosed pliers would fix the problem. Just as they turned the corner to the clubhouse a German Shepherd ran up and threw a bucket of water on them.
Thanks to Sandie for this picture: under a Live Oak in Ft Myers, FL
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Douglas J. Koufman in Palm Beach MIAMI -- Authorities say a Miami man cleaned out his elderly mother's savings, worth over $800,000. Douglas J. Koufman is charged with exploitation of an elderly person or disabled adult for more than $100,000. The 57-year-old surrendered Tuesday at the Palm Beach County Jail and posted bail Wednesday. According to an affidavit by the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office, Koufman misappropriated at least $873,000 from his mother's trust fund. His mother, Charlotte Koufman, is now 88 and suffers from dementia. Records show the woman's trust contained over $2 million in July 2004. Three residents at the Funny-Farm are at the doctor's office for their annual intelligence test. The doctor asks the first man, "What is three times three?" "274," he replies. The doctor asks the second man, "What is three times three?" "Tuesday," replies the second man. The doctor says to the third man, "Okay, your turn. What's three times three?" "Nine," says the third man. "That's great!" says the doctor. "How did you get that?" "Easy," says the third man. "I subtracted 274 from Tuesday."
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Johnny Re: Spybot Dear Webby Wish I knew about the Spyware two weeks ago. Had to shut my computer down until son could fix it. Johnny Dear Johnny It pays to look at the side menu in the Humor Letter every now and then. I have donated free space there for Spybot-Search&Destroy for 10 years now. Everything you see there is an "Essential" that we put on every Webby computer, before we let a user touch it. Have FUN! DearWebby
Lucy went to college. However, she really worried her folks because all she ever wrote home about was boys and good times. Her mother decided to have a serious talk with Lucy when she came home for a weekend. The mother started out by saying, "Now, dear, if you are only going to college to find a husband, it certainly will be expensive shopping." "Yes, I know, Mom," said Lucy, "but what a supermarket."
Daily tip from Store Important Items In Dishwasher in an Emergency If you ever need to leave in a hurry because of a flood approaching, a good place to store important items (computer tower, pictures, etc.) is in your dishwasher. It has a watertight seal that will protect your items. You could also put items in your front loading clothes washer. It will not work with a top loader clothes washer. By Fred from Michigan Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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