Is my printer infected? 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Friday, March 5, 2010
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

None are so busy as the fool and knave. --- John Dryden
A guy goes to a doctor and says: "Doctor, my wife has lost her voice, a week ago...." "And you are afraid she'll find it again ?"
Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her arithmetic classes: "A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars. One-fifth is to go to his wife, one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his butler, and the rest to charity. Now, what does each get?" After a very long silence in the classroom, Little Morris raised his hand. The teacher called on Little Morris for his answer. With complete sincerity in his voice, Little Morris answered, "A lawyer!"
Thanks to my dad for this picture: Looking down at the birds Eagels or Glacier Crows or some birds like that are playing in the strong updraft at the Valuga in Austria. This is high above the tree line and they are definitely not looking for something to eat, but simply goofing around and enjoying the updraft. There were whisps of cloud just below the peak and above the birds, causing a very interesting effect.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Jonathon Michael Smith, 22 in Fairbanks, Alaska Fairbanks man arrested again after trying to buy 4th truck with forged check by Chris Freiberg / FAIRBANKS — A Fairbanks man is accused of trying to purchase a $28,000 pickup truck with a forged check for the fourth time this year. Jonathon Michael Smith, 22, was arraigned Tuesday on new felony charges of attempted first-degree theft and second-degree forgery. He still faces more than a dozen other charges stemming from the previous incidents, and had been out on bail for only about two weeks when he allegedly tried to pull the scam Monday at Seekins Ford. Smith reportedly told a Seekins employee that he had recently come into a large sum of money, and he intended to purchase a 2007 Ford F-150 pickup truck. However, the manager became suspicious of the check from USAA and accompanying letter stating the check was valid, and contacted another local dealership that was allegedly swindled by Smith. USAA is a financial services company serving military members and their families. Smith was a Fort Wainwright soldier who was discharged in January following his initial arrest. He was AWOL from his unit for two years, said Maj. Bill Coppernoll, a spokesman for U.S. Army Alaska. Fairbanks police Officer Jim O’Malley responded to the dealership soon after the manager became aware that something was amiss. O’Malley was aware of Smith’s history and asked him what he was doing. Smith said that he was “being stupid,” according to a criminal complaint filed in court. Magistrate Bethany Harbison set Smith’s bail at $20,000. If he is released from jail, he is not allowed on the premises of a car dealership and he cannot possess checks or items purported to be checks. Smith allegedly used forged checks to purchase two trucks worth $70,000 from Kendall Honda in January. About the same time, he also tried to purchase a $25,000 truck from Gene’s Chrysler, but employees became suspicious of the checks Smith wrote and refused to deliver the vehicle. To create the checks, Smith allegedly altered a USAA check another man posted on his blog after removing the account and routing numbers. He would print the altered check from e-mails and try to pass them as real to the employees of local car dealerships, court documents allege. All of the forged checks had blurry printing, inconsistent fonts and lacked routing numbers, according to court records. In January, he told police he did not know why the checks had not been honored since he had money market and mutual fund accounts with USAA. He also claimed to have received an inheritance recently from his mother after she passed away. A USAA representative told Fairbanks police that Smith has a checking account with them with a zero balance, as well as an overdrawn credit card. The company does not e-mail checks to customers, according to court filings. At his arraignment Tuesday, Smith said he plans to hire his own lawyer.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Annette Re: Infected laser printer Dear Webby, I bought a Dell 1320c color laser when you recommended it a few years ago. It works flawlessly and is easy on the toner, especially when we use it in toner saving mode. Copies of invoices and stuff like that really don't have to be in crisp, bright color, so we usually print in black plus toner saving. Sure, the prints look like the currently fashionable faggy pages with grey text on white, that are difficult for straight people to read, but for a copy of an invoice, that most likely will never be looked at again anyway, that's good enough. Sorry about my rambling. So, while the printer works just fine, wehen my desk got moved closer to it last week, I noticed that every now and then it's lights come on, it makes mysterious whirring sounds like it was preparing to print, but then shuts down again. Is that a virus in it? Annette Dear Annette That is nothing to worry about at all. When not used for a day, it simply wakes up to do a self test and stirs up the toner powder, so that it doesn't clump or cake onto the walls of the toner cartridges. It is actually supposed to do that. As long as it does that self test and powder stirring at least once every second unused day, it is fine and ready to print, even after not being used for a year or two. Have FUN! DearWebby
A patient had broken his leg and it was going to have to be set. To get him ready for this painful event, he was heavily sedated. While in this "state", he spoke rather freely with the hospital staff and with his wife. She apparently learned several things about her husband. When it was time to reverse the medication, the wife said "Wait! not yet. I have some more questions I want to ask".
Daily tip from Use Rags Instead of Paper Towels Keep a rag on your paper towel rack and quit buying paper towels altogether! Use newspaper for washing windows. Use cheap paper napkins for food as needed. You'll be surprised at how often you'll grab that rag to wipe up a spill and you are saving lots of money. Have a bunch on hand and just wash up a load every once in a while. By Laura from Mason, OH As I am slowly learning to "act my age", well not trying too hard, I am wrecking my jeans not nearly as often as I used to. However, the legs of old jeans make excellent rags. They are very absorbent, and take a long time to dry. Whenever you need a moist rag, they are unbeatable. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

A lonely wife brought a man she had just met at a bar home to her bedroom one evening when she thought her husband was out of town. They immediately tore each other's clothes off and started going at it. She sat up quickly in bed as she heard the key in the lock. "Quick!" she said to the man, "it's my husband! You've got to get out of here quick!" "Where's the back door?" the man asked as he grabbed his clothes. "There isn't one," she replied. "Where would you like one?" he asked.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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One day a co-worker told my friend, Stan, that she was going home early because she didn't feel well. Since Stan was just getting over something himself, he wished her well and said he hoped it wasn't something he had given her. A fellow worker piped up, "I sure hope not. She has morning sickness."

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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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