Can I use Irfanview for re-sizing? 

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It's Sunday, March 21, 2010

If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. --- John Kenneth Galbraith
A guy was visiting his friend in the hospital who was 'all torn up'. "What happened?" he asked. "Well," explained the patient, "we were hunting the Mumba snake. It has yellow and black stripes. It likes to sun itself lying across a pathway in the jungle. You catch it by grabbing the tip of its tail with one hand and quickly running your other hand up the length of its body so you can grab it behind the neck." "Go on," the friend said. He continued, "Well, at mid day the shadows and the lit parts of the jungle sometimes make it difficult to see every detail, so when I sneaked up to the snake lying across the jungle path, I pounced on it in a flying leap, grabbed it by the end and rapidly moved my other hand upward ... just as the procedure goes." "So why are you so beaten up?" the friend asked. The patient said slowly, "Did you ever goose a *tiger*?"

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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to an American illegal border crosser. Sent in by Jackie Z Bordercrosser with axe, guns on bike stopped by cops By QMI Agency Saskatoon police have arrested a man they say crossed the border from the U.S. on a bike, carrying guns and an axe. The man, whose name hasn't been released, crossed over into Bromhead, Saskatchewan., according to a police statement. He faces five customs charges and nine weapons charges, and is set to appear in court on March 22. Police say the man told officers he was en route to visit a friend in Regina, and meant no harm. ... 94331.html
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Sharon Re: Can I use Irfanview for re-sizing? Dear Webby, These pics are very unusual. They are very colorful. Thanks for sharing. You talked about infaview for viewing & some editing of photos. Are there any other good free programs to use to edit photos. I mainly want to be able to open & resize pictures & lighten them. I usually try to resize them to 480H x 640W to email them & put on disk to save. I was using Microsoft Picture It 7 but after having my pc reformatted I can't access it the way I used too. Thanks again for sharing your tips & humor with us. Sharon Dear Sharon yes, Irfanview would do nicely for that. There is a link to it in my Tool Box Just above that, there is a link to GIMP. Many people claim that the free GIMP is just as good as the $900 Adobe Photoshop. Personally, I use PaintShopPro, and have used it for 20 years now. If I didn't have PaintShopPro, I would probably use GIMP, because for what I do, it would be difficult to justify $900. Have FUN! DearWebby
I have been asked for more church bulletin board Ooopses. Most of these I have printed before at various times, but here is a batch that you can take to church today: *Women's Luncheon: Each member bring a sandwich. Polly Phillips will give the medication. *If you choose to heave during the Postlude, please do so quietly. *We are grateful for the help of those who cleaned up the grounds around the church building and the rector. *Hymn: "I Love Thee My Ford" *Sign-up sheet for anyone wishing to be water baptized on the table in the foyer. *Newsletters are not being sent to absentees because of their weight. *Helpers are needed! Please sign up on the information sheep. *The Advent Retreat will be held in the lover level of St. Mary's Cathedral. *The District Duperintendent will be meeting with the church board. *As soon as the weather clears up, the men will have a goof outing. *Fifth Sinday is Lent. *Thank you dead friends. *Diana and Don request your presents at their wedding. *Lent is that period for preparing for Holy Weed and Easter. *Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget all His benefits. *For the word of God is quick and powerful...piercing even to the dividing asunder of soup and spirit. *Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peach to men. *Definition: Persons who are shut-in during bath weather. *Bring one dozen coolies wrapped for Christmas. *The lovers in the exhaust fan are not working... *Volunteers are needed to spit up food. *Head Deacon and Dead Deaconess *We pray that our people will jumble themselves.
Daily tip from Today's tip is too long to fit here. Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

A bunch of guys decided one morning that they would go deer hunting. So they all piled into the station wagon with their guns and took off down the road looking for a place to go hunting. After driving awhile they came across an old farm house with a large spread of woods behind it. One of the guys went to the door and asked the farmer if they could hunt in his woods. When asked, the farmer said "Yes, sure, but would you do me a favor? The ol' bull in the corall there beside the house is on his last legs and I know he is sufferin', would you kindly put him down for me? I don' have the heart to." As the hunter walked back to the station wagon, he decided to play a prank on his fellow hunters. So when he got back to the station wagon he pulled out his rifle and said "..I'll teach that old coot for not letting us hunt on his property!" and shot the old bull. After he fired the shot, he heard another shot and another one, and one of the other hunters proclaim, "Yea, we'll show him... I got the cow and the calf, too!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
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Linda went into the local bookstore and saw this big display with a sign saying "Newly Translated from the Original French: 37 Mating Positions." Noticing the books were already wrapped in plain brown paper, she just had to buy one. Once safely at home, she opened it and found that she had just purchased a very expensive book about chess.

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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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