How to become VISTA administrator 

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It's Saturday, April 17, 2010

The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn. --- David Russell People are like stained glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within. ---Elizabeth Kubler Ross As you journey through life take a minute every now and then to give a thought for the other fellow. He could be plotting something. --- Hagar the Horrible Busy is a state of mind and a matter of priorities. --- DearWebby
The Nurse was taking Joe's blood pressure. She caused him some concern by rechecking it twice, then saying, "Hmmmm. That's odd -- it's normal." He replied that he had taken his high blood pressure medicine less than an hour ago. She said, "Thank goodness. I thought I was losing it. Normally when I take the men's BP readings they're always on the high side."
The showers in my daughter's dorm turned scalding hot whenever a toilet was flushed. To warn others, residents would yell out, "Flushing!" each time they flushed the toilets. During one of my daughter's visits home, a friend stopped by to chat for a while. I was explaining how my daughter was acting more distant now that she was in college, and that she didn't tell me all about her life the way she used to. Suddenly we heard my daughter call out from the bathroom, "Flushing!" "Good grief," said my friend, "How much more do you want to know?"
Thanks to Janina for this great picture: Dear Webby, You kindly share your wonderful flower and nature photos with us - now it's MY turn to share a close-up of our cherry blossoms in full bloom now, here in New Jersey. Enjoy! Janina
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Daniel Hammond, 21 in Sevenoaks, England Serial hoaxer claimed he was raped by whale A BRAZEN prankster claimed he was raped by a whale and gave his name as Ben Dover during one of many hoax calls to the emergency services. Daniel Hammond made nuisance calls for eight months, telling busy emergency operators he lived in Doctor Who's TARDIS. On one occasion, he reported that his manhood fell off because he smoked too much weed and was struggling to have sex. Another time, the lanky 21-year-old impersonated Saddam Hussein and claimed he hid a bomb on a train, a court in Sevenoaks, England, was told. Prosecutor James Nichols said Hammond enjoyed the thrill of wasting the emergency services' time with his bizarre and persistent tales. The court was told that Hammond was caught when he called to report threats he claimed he was receiving, and police recognised his mobile phone number. When Hammond was finally arrested, he said he "couldn't remember" all of the disturbing details of the calls but admitted the offenses. Defence lawyer Laura Hollingham said her client's behaviour was a result of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. The court was also told that Hammond suffered from depression and that his family was struggling to cope with his "many problems".
From the Tech Support Pits: From: BETTY re: VISTA administrator logon required DOES THE 'HOW TO BECOME WINDOWS ADMIN. QUESTION ALSO APPLY TO WINDOWS VISTA?? Dear Betty I don't allow VISTA onto Webby computers, so I don't really know. However, there is info about making yourself the Vista administrator at this site: Have FUN! DearWebby
Overheard downtown: "My wife and I have structured conversations: firstly, she gives me her opinion, then she gives me my opinion."
Daily tip from Coffee Filters for Small Servings of Food A great use for coffee filters are single serving plates for chips (or anything that is not moist or leaky) for kids. This is especially handy in a group or class, and combines easy clean-up with much less waste than a regular plastic or paper plate. By Mrs. Putty from Barrie, Ont. Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

Have you ever worked in an office where someone insisted upon listening to their voice mail using the speakerphone (at full volume, naturally). It can really begin to bother you after a while. I found a fairly easy fix for that, though. I ask a lady friend, whom she has never heard, call her desk when she's not there, and leave a message like "Hi, this is Candy from 1-900-HOT-BABE. You haven't paid for the 'toys' we sent you, you naughty girl! You wouldn't want me to come over there and spank you, would you ?" That is probably the last time you ever hear that particular speakerphone.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
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Linda's son was in the process of being potty trained. One summer day, he came in from outside, all wet. Linda asked, "Did you have an accident?". Yes, he replied. Well, what did you do, water the trees, the bushes,...?" "Oh, no," he replied. "I went in the garage." Shocked, Linda responded, "Well, you shouldn't do that. It will start to stink, draw flies; now I'll have to go out and hose down the garage." Her son replied cheerfully: " But Mom, it's OK, I didn't go in our garage, I went in Jill's garage!!"

SmugMug Slideshow
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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