Excel slow on Windows 7 

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It's Saturday, April 24, 2010

" It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend. " --- William Blake Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. --- Samuel Goldwyn Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you. --- Socratex
At a fancy reception a young man was asked by a widow to guess her age. "You must have some idea," she urged when he hesitated. "I have several ideas," he admitted with a smile, "the trouble is that I don't know whether to make it ten years younger because of your looks or ten years older because of your wisdom."
As we drove along a Los Angeles thoroughfare lined with spectacular advertising signs, nine- year-old Billy exclaimed: "Look at all the bullboards!"

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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Brian Splain, 46,Brian Splain, 46, in Marathon, Florida Man Charged With Sand Theft The Monroe County Sheriff's Office said deputies responded to reports Sunday of a truck stuck in the sand at Coco Plum Beach in Marathon and three deputies arrived to find Brian Splain, 46, with his 1989 Ford F-150 loaded with sand from the beach, the Miami Herald reported Tuesday. The deputies said Splain, who failed field sobriety tests, told them he needed the sand for a job. Splain was arrested and booked into the Monroe County jail on charges of grand theft of the sand, criminal mischief and driving while impaired. ---------- Even though people are complaining about beaches widening, there are still laws against taking sand without a permit.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Brigitta re: Excel on Windows 7 Dear Webby Sheelagh sure was spot on by calling Windows 7 "Blonde Windows". It's an advertisement for Linux, and even Macs are starting to look like a usable alternative! I almost got fired because of it, well actually because of unplugging a brand new computer and throwing it at the guy who had plugged it in. I use M$ Office and on the old XP computer Excel spreadsheets pop up almost as fast as they do on Quattro on my even older computer at home. Normal spreadsheets full of numbers and graphs. The new computer came with a trial of the newest M$ Office good for 25 uses. To transfer the files, the new machine was put beside the old one and connected to the same network. The same spreadsheets are pathetically slow on the W7 machine, way too slow for getting the work done, that I am expected to do every day. The new machine has four times the CPU speed, twice the RAM, and a near empty, uncluttered hard drive without any fixit utilities slowing it down. I didn't quite apologize for throwing the computer, but I promised to ask you, if there was a way to make it usable for big spreadsheets. So I did. Brigitta Dear Brigitta You can download and install Open Office. It is free. That is one reason most businesses are switching to it. It's spreadsheets are a little bit faster than Excel. Quatto would be faster yet, and with more features, but don't use an XP 32 bit Quattro on a W7-64 bit machine. Windows 7 does not deal with it very well. You will have to use Quattro for W7 from Corel Office X5, but X5 costs about $100, unless you can find an OEM issue on eBay. In the long run, though, the best solution would be to put XP or Linux onto that machine. Those are made for work, not for looking cutesy. Have FUN! DearWebby
A married couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. At the party everybody wanted to know how they managed to stay married so long in this day and age. The husband responded "When we were first married we came to an agreement. I would make all the major decisions and my wife would make all the minor decisions. And in 60 years of marriage we have never needed to make a major decision."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Donate Usable Yard Sale Leftovers Most of us "thrifty people" have yard sales occasionally. We usually have in the contents of our sale, items that we no longer use or want. After a sale there are always items that didn't sell. Let's all remember the less fortunate and donate our leftover items. Most community churches will accept donations to help victims of fire, flood, etc. Speaking as a tornado victim, I know firsthand how the smallest things, such as toys for a child, or clothing for the elderly are appreciated. When a family loses everything, there will be not one item that goes to waste. By vguy from Earle, AR http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:

74 year old Harold tripped on the stairs and broke his leg. The doctor put a cast on it and warned that he wasn't to use the stairs until the cast came off. A month later he removed the cast and pronounced him well on the way to recovery. "Oh good," he responded. "Is it all right for me to walk the stairs now?" "Yes," said the doctor, "if you will promise to be careful." "I can't tell you what a relief it will be," Harold sighed. "It was such a nuisance crawling outside and shinnying up and down that drainpipe all the time!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
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The little boy was caught swearing by his teacher. "Billy," she said, "you shouldn't use that kind of language. Where did you hear it?" "My daddy said it," he responded. "Well, that doesn't matter," she explained, "I don't want to hear that language in here again." After a moment, she whispered aloud, "At least he doesn't know what it means." "I do, too," Billy corrected. "It means the car won't start."

Time Toons
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from Webby.com

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