Color laser printer 

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It's Wednesday, June 9, 2010

I never did give anybody hell. I just told the truth, and they thought it was hell. --- Harry S Truman By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. --- Socrates
"I just hope it's not Alzheimer's," confessed the gentleman to his doctor. "Maybe there's some kind of memory medicine you can give me. See, I'm getting terribly forgetful; I lose track of where I'm going or what I'm supposed to do when I get there. What should I do?" he asked glumly. "Pay me in advance," the doctor promptly suggested.
A man was invited for dinner at a friends house. Every time the host needed something, he precede his request to his wife by calling her "My Love", "Darling", "Sweetheart", etc., etc. His friend looked at him and said, "that's really nice after all of these years you've been married to keep saying those little pet names." "Well, to tell you the real truth," the host whispered, " I've forgotten her name."
Large For all those, who asked for close-ups of the night blooming Selenicereus grandiflorus yesterday, they are on And yes, 11 blossoms open in one night is indeed exceptional, but you saw the picture!
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Katrina Wade, 37 Busted for selling dope in prison JUNE 1-- After Katrina Wade, a Florida woman was arrested last month for drug trafficking, an acquaintance told cops that Wade was hiding up to 100 baggies of heroin inside her vagina. However, after a strip search failed to turn up any contraband --and a "body cavity search was denied by the jail"-- Wade allegedly continued dealing behind bars, trading nickel bags fished from her vagina for commissary items like deodorant, hair grease, and a radio. Wade's jailhouse dealing ended last Wednesday, after four fellow Charlotte County inmates told investigators about her scheme. When confronted by investigators--who said they were prepared to examine Wade with an ultrasound device-- the inmate "admitted that she did have heroin in her vagina," according to the probable cause affidavit. With a blanket covering the lower part of her body, Wade then removed a "clear plastic bag that contained 12 small green plastic bags" of heroin. Wade admitted that she "had more originally, but used some herself along with her co-defendants while in the holding cell." Wade, who claimed that she turned over the smack to clear her conscience, was charged with two felonies and a misdemeanor for the jailhouse racket.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Brigitte RE: Color laser Dear Webby A few years ago you mentioned a color laser printer, that you were quite happy with. Is that still so? Or did you have to get a diferent printer since then? Is that printer available in Europe too, or would I have to order it from Canada? Oh, and what was the name of the printer? Thanks Brigitte Dear Brigitte That is a Dell 1320c, and I am still quite happy with it. It is fast, quiet, never jams, and prints as well as the paper allows. For high gloss photo prints you need high gloss paper, but that is to be expected. You can also select to print in B/W toner saving mode, and get a less crisp result, but that is more than good enough for receipts and invoices. It IS available in Europe with the same name, and costs $185 Euros. Since it works so well and reliably, you don't really have to spend extra on extending the warranty. The price might seem high, but when you consider that it easily outlasts 5 cheap $60 printers, it is a bargain. Have FUN! DearWebby
Two guys were at a bar talking about how highly their wives thought of them. The first guy said, "My wife, she thinks so much of me that she won't let me do any work around the house. It's incredible." The second guy says, "That's nothing. My wife thinks I'm God." "She thinks you're God? What makes you say that?" "Easy. Every night she places a burnt offering before me."
Daily tip from Place Dishes Directly Into Soapy Water While Cooking This is something my mother taught me. I always keep a sink of soapy, hot water ready whenever I am cooking. I am constantly cleaning while I am cooking. By the time I am ready to serve dinner, I only have a few dishes to clean. This also helps with spills and splatters. Source: My mother By Jetruth from Waterloo, IA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:

Old man Johnson limped into the doctor's office and said, "Doc, my knee hurts so bad, I can hardly walk!" The doctor slowly eyed him from head to toe, paused and then said, "Mr. Johnson, just how old are you?" "98!" Johnson announced proudly. The doctor just sighed, and looked at him again. . . Finally he said, "Sir, I'm sorry. I mean, just look at you. You're practically one hundred years old, and you're complaining that your knee hurts? Well, what did you expect?" The old man said, "Well, my other knee is 98 years old too, and it don't hurt!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
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A missionary discovered a tribe of Indians who had never recorded a baptism, confirmation or marriage. The bishop soon rectified the situation by baptizing and confirming everyone. He also married every beaming couple that walked by. Later, the tribal chief told the Bishop the tribe had never had so much fun. The bishop asked the chief which part they enjoyed the most. "The marriage service," the chief said, smiling. "We all got new wives!"

Stain Solutions
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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