Access to the Hunger Site 

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It's Saturday, June 26, 2010

My girlfriend is at that stage when her biological clock is telling her it's time for her to be making me feel guilty and immature. Time to get a new one. --- Kevin Hench The human race has one really effective weapon and that is laughter. --- Mark Twain
A wife is sitting in the living room watching TV, when all of a sudden she hears her husband in the bedroom, swearing up a storm. He is using every bad word in the book. The wife runs into the bedroom to see what is going on. She finds her husband just sitting on the bed. She asks her husband, "honey, what happened? Did you fall down and get hurt or something?" The husband looks up and replies, "no, I'm fine. I'm just practicing." The wife gets a real confused look on her face, and said, "practicing? Practicing for what?" Then the husband says, "Tomorrow my suspension is over and I can go play golf again!"
An auto mechanic received a repair order that read: "Check for clunking sound when going around corners." Taking the car out for a test drive, he made a right turn, and a moment later he heard a 'clunk.' He then made a left turn and again heard a 'clunk.' Back at the shop he opened the car's trunk, and soon discovered the problem. Promptly he returned the repair order to the service manager with the notation, "Removed dead pumpkin from trunk".
Thanks to Walter, the Stonecarver for sending this picture:
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Leah Osborne, 27 in Stillwater, Oklahoma Drunk As A Skunk, Er, Raccoon Intoxicated Oklahoma woman busted after picking up stray critter JUNE 22--Meet Leah Osborne. On reflection, the Oklahoma woman likely regrets recently stopping her car to pick up a stray raccoon she found on a Stillwater roadway. According to cops, Osborne, 27, was intoxicated and had an open bottle of vodka in her vehicle when she "stopped and picked up the raccoon from the roadway" one evening last month. But when "the animal began to show a more animated side" inside her car, Osborne stopped and extricated the raccoon, which promptly hid beneath her vehicle. At this point, Stillwater cop Kurt Merrill arrived on the scene, responding to a call about a raccoon in the roadway. When the raccoon emerged from beneath the car, Osborne ran past Merrill and "laid down in a road side ditch" that was muddy and "had standing water from recent rains." Osborne remained in the ditch until, Merrill reported, "I was able to chase the animal into a line of nearby trees." A District Court probable cause affidavit, filed June 3, notes that a Breathalyzer test recorded Osborne's blood alcohol content as .37, nearly five times the legal limit. As a result, Osborne was charged with drunk driving. She also had a revoked drivers license.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Honor RE: Hunger Site Hi Webby... Could you tell me how to contact the 'Hunger Site' and the others, to click for daily donations..I need it for the days that Comcast decides I don't need to see the Webby Humor Letter that day. Irritating, but no one at Comcast seems to be interested enough to correct the problem. Does make me wonder what else I'm not getting! Thanks for this...and all you do! Honor Dear Honor You can always browse to I don't think the comklutzes are able to block that. You might want to switch important mail over to a gmail address, or open a personal domain. Have FUN! DearWebby
There was a little old lady standing at a corner. She had both hands holding her hat on while the wind blew her dress up around her waist. A dignified southern gentleman came up and said, "Ma'am, you should be ashamed of yourself, letting your skirt blow around, being indecent, while both hands hold your hat." She said, "Look mister, everything down there is seventy years old. This hat is brand new!"
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Twohundred pound Nancy is five feet, two inches tall and considers herself pleasingly plump. After she had a minor accident, her mother accompanied her to the emergency room. The ER nurse asked for her height and weight, and she blurted out, "Five-foot-eight, 115 pounds." While the nurse pondered over this information, her mother leaned over and whispered to her: "Nancy," she gently chided, "this is not the Internet."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
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A nearsighted minister glances at the note that a member of the congregation has delivered to him through an usher. The note reads, "Bill Jones, having gone to sea, his wife desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety." Failing to observe the punctuation, the minister startles his audience by announcing: "Bill Jones, having gone to see his wife, desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety."

Doggy Doings
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Well, , that's all for today. Have FUN ! Dear Webby from

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