Multiple anti-malware programs 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Thursday, December 16, 2010

While weeding out the bonehad candidates, I noticed an 
interesting trend. Some people actually WANT to go to jail, 
apparently to have a warm place to live.

Have FUN!

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America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. --- Oscar Wilde "It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.'" --- Sam Levenson
Miranda likes to sing, and whenever she begins, her husband heads outside. Hurt, she asked him, "Don't you like my singing?" "Of course, dear," he replied. "I just want to make sure the neighbors know I'm not beating you."
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A rather awkward freshman finally got up the nerve to ask a pretty junior for a dance at the homecoming. She gave him the once-over and said, "Sorry, I won't dance with a kid." "OOOPS," responded the underclassman, "I didn't realize you were pregnant."
Thanks to Verna from Beechy, Saskatchewan for these pictures: Click through the picture to the large version. Dear Webby, The December rain in the Coteau Hills was prettier on the weeds than on the road! Verna
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Julie L. Pennington, 39 in Helena, Montana Helena woman asks to be arrested When spinning doughnuts in front of the police station didn’t get her the attention she wanted, an allegedly drunken 39-year-old Helena woman parked her vehicle, went to the window at the law enforcement center and asked for assistance in getting arrested for driving under the influence. “She was upset that she had been driving around spinning donuts and no officers had arrested her. She said she wanted to get arrested because she was drunk,” Helena Police Chief Troy McGee said. Julie L. Pennington’s request was granted at about 2 a.m. Tuesday, McGee said. Pennington also allegedly crashed into a vehicle parked near the police station and took out the bumper of her 1991 Jeep Cherokee by hitting a retaining wall in the backside of the building. “She said she was breaking the law on purpose to try and get arrested,” McGee said. Police arrested Pennington on misdemeanor charges of DUI, driving with no insurance, careless driving, reckless driving, leaving the scene of an accident, driving on a suspended license and having an open container of alcohol in the vehicle. Police say she remained too intoxicated to appear before Helena Municipal Court judge Tuesday morning.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Pat Re: Multiple anti-malware programs Dear Webby, I currently have Norton, MacAfee and Trend Micro PC-Cillin. This seems a bit redundant to me and I'm getting reminders to renew. Which would you let expire ? I bow to your expertise. Merry Christmas. Pat --------------------- Dear Pat I use McAfee, Registry Booster, MailWasher, and DisKeeper Each of those is the best in their own separate field. They don't duplicate each other. Sure, you could use McAfee to reduce your spam, and if you are not fussy, that is probably good enough. But if you DO get a lot of spam and don't want to waste time on it, then you need the big gun: MailWasher. The same applies to DisKeeper. There are dozens of defragmenters available, many even free, but you get exactly what you pay for with those. If your data is not worth $29, then get a free defragmenter and disk tuner. Unlike most magazine writers, I don't just reprint promotional material. I only recommend what I actually use and actually like. The programs I mention here I have used for many years on my own machines. Other programs I experience on other people's machines. Have FUN! DearWebby
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"What's your father's occupation?" asked the school secretary on the first day of registration. "He's a magician," said the new boy. "How exciting. What's his best trick?" "He saws people in half." "How impressive! Now, do you have any brothers or sisters?" " half brother and two half sisters."
Daily tip from Give the New Jammies the Night Before For a fun Christmas tradition, new Christmas jammies for the family with matching slipper socks. I put them all into a big gift box to be opened Christmas Eve. Then Christmas pics around the tree in our pretty and colorful new jammies. By Mamie from Upstate NY Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
A woman had gained a few pounds. It was most noticeable to her when she squeezed into a pair of her old blue jeans. Wondering if the added weight was noticeable to everyone else, she asked her husband, "Honey, do these jeans make me look like the side of the house?" "No, dear, not at all," he replied. "Our house isn't blue."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A certain motivational speaker snuck out the back stage exit for a smoke while an assistant was showing a short audivisual presentation. Out there, huddled against the rain under the shelter of the stage loading dock were some members of a school board meeting who had gone outside "for some fresh air". One of them recognized him by his bright name tag and instantly struck up a conversation as if she was familiar with him. "Tell me," she asked, "how you detect in somebody whether they have potential for success or not?" "Nothing is easier," he replied. "You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." "What sort of question?" "Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?' She thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."

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