What is an IP number? 



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Good Morning,  !
It's Friday, December 31, 2010
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

If you need some New Year's cards, go to http://dawna.com
I just put up 56 with a suitable winter theme, 
many of them pictures, that I have used here, and
none of them overlaid with sappy messages. You
can add those yourself, if required.



Have FUN!
DearWebby


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"A man would do nothing if he waited until he could do it so well that no one could find fault." --- John Henry Newman "Count your age with friends but not with years." --- Socratex
Just before a soldier made his first parachute jump, his sergeant reminded him, "Count to ten and pull the first rip cord. If it snarls, pull the second rip cord for the auxiliary chute. After you land, our truck will pick you up." The paratrooper took a deep breath and jumped. He counted to ten, and pulled the first cord. Nothing happened. He pulled the second cord. Again, nothing happened. As he careened crazily earthward, he said to himself: "Man. Nothing goes right. I'll bet that truck won't be there either!" TWACK he bombed into a huge manure pile. Just as he burrowed his way out and saw daylight again, the head of his buddy popped out of the manure a few feet away and in his slow Texan drawl sang out: "...an one ahs TAN!" ------------------- When I was a kid, I heard that story about Swiss paratroopers. The only difference was that instead of a waiting truck, it was a waiting bicycle, and the slow talking buddy was from Bern, the Swiss capital.
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Barbie, a waitress, decided to put her matchmaking skills to the test with our mutual friend Mike. She figured that Sandy, another friend who seemed to have much in common with Mike, would be an ideal date. One day Mike came into the restaurant when Sandy was also there. Barbie dragged Mike over to Sandy's table and introduced the two. Then she watched as Mike put his arm around the young woman and said in his best mock-seductive voice, "Helloooo, Sandy. What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?" "You guys know each other?" Barbie asked. "We sure do," said Mike. "She's my sister."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Pastor Sandy McGriff, 52, in Dallas, Texas Pastor caught in Christmas Eve break-in A Dallas pastor accused of stealing more than $10,000 worth of fur coats, designer purses and electronics from a church member's home on Christmas Eve says that she's really innocent. "I thought I was helping," Sandy McGriff, 52, told reporters by way of explaining why she was found at the home of Serita Agnew by police last week. McGriff, pastor of the Church of the Living God, spent part of Christmas Day in jail, and was released on $26,000 bail. Police responded to a neighbor's 911 call around 5:30 pm on Friday, according to The Dallas Morning news. Officers found a broken kitchen window and saw McGriff carrying two fur coats out of the house. They also found a laptop and three purses in McGriff's Jaguar. From the Morning News' initial report: McGriff told officers that a friend had sent her to pick up her coats and that her arm was injured because she could not find a key under the doormat and had to break in through the window. Police called the resident, Serita Agnew, who told them she had not given anyone permission to go into her house or take her property.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Rosemarie Re: What is an IP number? Dear Webby I don't know what IP stands for.. Can U enlighten me.. Happy New Year to you.. Tschüss...Rosemarie Dear Rosemarie An IP adress is a unique number, which identifies a computer and its location on the internet, like a very precise, world wide postal code. Depending on your Internet account, you can have a fixed IP number, that is reserved for you, or you can have a dynamic IP number. With a dynamic IP number, your ISP just assigns the next free number to you, whenever you go onto the net. ISPs keep records of who had which number at what times. Have FUN! DearWebby
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An effusive client brought a litter of golden-retriever puppies to my veterinary clinic for inoculations and worming. She loved them so much, she couldn't keep from remarking about their cute habits. As the look-alike pups squirmed over and under one another in their box, I realized it would be difficult to tell the treated ones from the rest. I turned on the water faucet, wet my fingers, and moistened each dog's head when I had finished. After the fourth puppy, I noticed my hitherto talkative client had grown silent. As I sprinkled the last pup's head, the woman leaned forward and whispered, "I never realized they had to be baptized."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Pack Up Christmas For New Years New Year's Christmas decorations usually make me a little sad. So this year I have decided to make a new tradition. Throughout the week between Christmas and New Year's, we are taking down some of the decorations we have throughout our home, and ceremoniously storing them away. On New Year's Eve we will slowly take down our tree, counting down as we go! This would be great for children to participate in. We obviously don't go out and party on New Year's Eve. We usually stay at home with some food trays, and watch the festivities on TV. This way, we are "prepared" for the New Year to come! :D By AHA! from Sterling, PA http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Thanks to beth for this story: During a weekly weight-loss class, the group leader was extolling the merits of the program's prepared-food products. She raved about the rich, delicious flavor of the imitation chocolate fudge and the nondairy pop tarts, assuring us that we could eat them without the least fear of ruining our diets. The woman next to me nodded her head emphatically and then whispered, "They're even better when you spread peanut butter and jam on them!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
According to women... "Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with." According to men.... "Women are like fine wine. They all start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating to the mind and then turn full-bodied with age until they go all sour and vinegary and give you a head- ache."

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