Is Free Norton good enough? 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Thanks to Martin for this cartoon:

AND Muslims from the other side of the Sunni/Shiite divide!

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"I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand." --- Confucius "Prosperity is a great teacher; adversity a greater." --- William Hazlitt
A very nervous man, accompanied by his nagging wife, was examined by a doctor. After checking the chart, the doctor nodded and wrote out a prescription for a powerful tranquilizer. The man asked, "How often do I take these?" "Let's start off with once every six hours. But they're not for you," replied the doctor. "They're for your wife."
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Here is a nice old classic! Boudreaux was feeling guilty, so he went to confession. "Father, I kinda took a leetle lumber from dat new construction site." Priest: "What did you do with the lumber, my son"? Boudreaux: "Well, Father, my porch, she's had a hole for a long time.I'm 'fraid someone will break dey laig, so I fix de hole. " Priest: "Well, that's not so bad." Boudreaux: "Well, Father, I had a leetle lumber left over." Priest: "What did you do with it?" Boudreaux: "Well, my poor dog, Phideaux, he ain't never had no place to get outta de wether, so I make him his own leetle doghouse." Priest: "OK, anything else?" Boudreaux: "Well, Father, I had a leetle lumber left over. So you know, my truck, she ain't never had no place to get outta de wether either, so I make her a two car garage." Priest: "Now, this is getting a little out of hand." Boudreaux: "Well, Father, I still had a leetle lumber left over." Priest: "Yes?" Boudreaux: "Well, my wife, she always want a bigger house. So I add two bedrooms and a new bat'room." Priest: "OK! That's definitely too much. For your penance, you are going to have to make a Novena. You do know how to make a Novena, don't you?" Boudreaux: "No, Father...But, if you got de blueprints, I got de lumber." (For those of you who don't know, a Novena is a huge set of prayers)
Thanks to Norm for sending this picture: Click through the picture to the large version. The bridge is finished and in use now, but this must be the prettiest picture from the construction.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Stephanie Moreland, 46, in Bloomington, Minnesota Shoplifter hid mink coat under underwear BLOOMINGTON, Minn. (WCCO) – A female shoplifting suspect hid a stolen mink coat in her underwear while she was in jail for three days. Stephanie Moreland was arrested New Year’s Eve by Bloomington Police after the Alaskan Fur Company reported a short mink coat was stolen by a woman who had been in the store and acting suspiciously. One of the sales associates, Simona Storchak, confronted Moreland when she saw a $6500 coat was missing. She said Moreland denied having the coat and took off. Storchak wrote down the license plate on the woman’s car and called police. When Bloomington officers located the car a short time later, they found a hanger from the store, but no coat. They searched her for weapons and booked her into their jail for the weekend on theft charges. Three days later, a detective interviewed Moreland who admitted she stole the coat but claimed she had already sold it. When the investigator informed Moreland he would be sending her to the Hennepin County Jail downtown, he was shocked when she lifted up her dress and pulled out the mink coat from her underwear. “She had modified her underwear. She actually cut the rear of the underwear out so that from the back it appeared she was not wearing underwear and then stuffed it down the front,” said Bloomington Police Commander Mark Stehlik. Stehlik said the suspect, who is 46 years old, weighs about 270 pounds which helped make it easier for her to conceal the short jacket.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Roland Re: Is free Norton good enough? Dear Webby, My ISP will give us free subscription for Norton, is there much difference between Norton and MacAfee Roland Dear Roland Some people say that Norton is good enough, as long as it is free. I am not one of those people. McAfee is good enough, that people actually pay for it. That's the group of people I'm in. Norton does catch most viruses and some malware, but it causes problems with Windows. Remember the Norton ads in the late 90's, that said it takes Norton to make Windows complete? That seems to have annoyed some of the tens of thousands of programmers at Microsoft, and since Windows 2000, Norton does not mesh with Windows as well as paying customers would expect. I don't know ANY honest tech, who recommends Norton. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Although this married couple enjoyed their new fishing boat together, it was the husband who was behind the wheel operating the boat. Still, he was concerned about what might happen in an emergency. So one day out on the lake he said to his wife, "Honey, take the wheel... Pretend that I am having a heart attack. You must get the boat safely to shore and dock it." So she steered the boat to shore and docked it. Later that evening, the wife walked into the livingroom where her husband was reading a novel... She sat down next to him, switched the TV channel, and said to him, "Honey, go into the kitchen. Pretend I'm having a heart attack. Do the laundry, cook dinner, set the table, and wash the dishes."
Daily tip from Homemade Muffins for Breakfast Find a good basic muffin recipe and play with it. Experiment with different kinds of flour or combinations of flour. Use different nuts, fruits, coconut, spices, etc. Freeze the baked muffins and warm one a day in the microwave for breakfast. My current muffin is a combination of whole wheat and soy flour, pecans, molasses, ginger, cinnamon, baking powder, canola oil, coconut, Splenda, brown sugar, vanilla yogurt, blueberry applesauce, eggs, skim milk, and skim milk. They are delicious and cheaper than Vitamuffins, although I do love Vitamuffins. By Susannl from St. Cloud, FL Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
I don't think I'll ever have a mother's intuition. My sister left me alone in a restaurant with my 12-month-old nephew. I said, "What do I do if he cries?" She said, "Give him some vegetables." It turns out that jalapenos are not his favorite.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon here and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
"So, what's the matter? I thought you just got back from a nice relaxing fishing trip with your husband." "Oh, everything went wrong: First Alfred said I talked so loud I would scare the fish. Then he said I was using the wrong bait; and then that I was reeling in too soon. "All that might have been all right; but then, to make matters worse, he had to pay the fine because according to the fish warden we had caught more than the limit for both of us. But Alfred had not had a single bite!"

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