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Good Morning,  !
It's Sunday, May 1, 2011

It warmed up to 8 above freezing in the afternoon, but with
a nasty north wind. I went for my walk anyway, and even wore
my shorts. Yes, sure I looked goofy, wearing my parka jacket
and shorts, but nobody laughed. 
Mainly because nobody else was out walking.

One lady, who turned up her collar to brave the wind chill
between her car at the curb and her house, pointed at my legs
and pumped a raised fist. 

So I walked an additional two miles. This opposite of gullible 
warming is a nuisance, but it won't stop me!

Have FUN!

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Politicians should read science fiction, not westerns and detective stories. --- Arthur C. Clarke
A woman approached the minister after the sermon, and thanked him for his discourse. "I found it so helpful," she said. The minister replied: "I hope it will not prove as helpful as the last sermon you heard me preach." "Why, what do you mean?" asked the astonished woman. "Well," said the minister, "that sermon lasted you three years."
Learn Digital Photography Now Learn How To Quickly And Easily Start Taking Awesome Photos With Any Digital Camera, Even If You Are A Complete Newbie! This course will make a bigger difference than a new camera!

A math teacher is instructing her class in multiplication and gives the students a problem to solve. "Now class," she says. "We know there are 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour, 24 hours in a day and 365 days in a year. So who can tell me how many seconds there are in a year?" All the kids look baffled by the question except one little fellow sitting in the back row. He raises his hand and waves it excitedly, and the teacher points to him. "All right, how many seconds are there in a year?" the teacher asks. "Twelve, ma'am," the little fellow says brightly. "January second, February second, March second ..."
Click through the picture to the large version. Carnival 2011 in Brazil
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Christopher Martell, 35, Camp Verde jail, Arizona Re-Arrested Northern Arizona authorities say a man just released from jail has been rearrested for allegedly stealing a vehicle and causing an accident. Yavapai County Sheriff's officials say 35-year-old Christopher Martell was released from the Camp Verde Detention Center on Thursday afternoon. He had been in custody for trespassing at the sheriff's evidence facility in Prescott Valley. Hours after getting out of jail, authorities say Martell allegedly stole a vehicle that belongs to a member of the detention staff. Martell was later arrested after authorities say he intentionally crashed into another car and injuring a female driver. Deputies say Martell has been booked back into jail on charges including car theft, criminal damage, aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and resisting arrest. He's being held on $60,000 bond.
From the Tech Support Pits: From Greta Re: How do I smooth old writing on pictures? Dear Webby, Now that I have seen the picture o the forgery, it is rather obvious. If I did that with my driver's license, I'd get thrown into the slammer instantly! Can I smooth captions and writing on old pictures? They are in GIF format and just maps with directions to different sights in the park. Thanks Greta Dear Greta First save the pictures in JPG, PSP, PSD, or PNG format. Increase the color depth from 256 to 16 Million. The soften the picture, and if necessary, soften more. After that, sharpen and increase contrast. It won't make the writing quite as smooth and elegant as if you write it fresh, but it will look much better than it did. Have FUN DearWebby
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~ There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory. I forget the other two.
Daily tip from Remove Pine Sap with WD40 This is a handy tip I learned while cleaning up pine limbs after a recent ice storm. If you get pine sap on your skin you can spray a little WD40 on it and rub it gently. Then wash with soap and water and it will come off completely. I wish I had discovered this sooner as in the past it has been such a pain to finally get it all off. By Vickie from Dawson Springs, KY Yes, that is why every logger carries a can of WD40, except during mosquito season. OFF spray works exactly the same. Loggers, of course, don't bother with the soap and water until the end of the shift. Spraying the hands with WD40, wringing them a bit like a frantic preacher, and wiping them on the jeans works well enough. Removing the sap promptly is extremely important when limbing and not using gloves. The sap makes spots on the hands stick to the axe handle and quickly raises blisters. By using WD40 promptly whenever you get sap onto your hands, you can log all year long without getting blisters. Have FUN! DearWebby Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
The week Sue started a new job, her husband was out of town. On the day he was to return, she thought it would be fun if he picked her up at work and they could go out to dinner. She left a note on the dining-room table with her new number and this message: "For a good time, call 555-1234." When her husband failed to show up, Sue took the bus home. "Where were you?" she asked. "Didn't you get my note?" "Oh," he replied with a sheepish grin, "I wasn't sure who wrote it."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
On a flight to Florida, I was preparing my notes for one of the parent-education seminars I conduct as an educational psychologist. The elderly woman sitting next to me explained that she was returning to Miami after having spent two weeks visiting her six children, 18 grandchildren and ten great-grandchildren in Boston. Then she inquired what I did for a living. I told her, fully expecting her to question me for free professional advice. Instead she sat back, picked up a magazine and said, "If there's anything you want to know, just ask me."

Edible Roots

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