Scottland's Independence party won, is separation imminent? 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Monday, May 9

Did anybody notice, that the SNP, the Independence Party in 
Scottland, won by a land slide?
Huh ?
Scottland ?
Yes, Scottland. 
While everybody was busy with the royal wedding, and White House 
forgeries and Bin Laden, Scottland had an election.

I wouldn't panic yet about Scottland separating and rebuilding 
Hadrian's Wall. Mainly they just want to keep 100 % of
the money from the North Sea Oil, be in charge of their
taxes, especially corporate taxes, and fisheries rules and
regulation, of course. 

The plan is to stay in the monarchy and keep the queen,
and let England take care of defense, plus medical and welfare, 
of course. Eventually they want to be an equal partner to 
Britain in the EU, but until they can recruit or train enough
multilingual people for ambassador jobs, they plan to let
England take care of foreign politics.

The whole thing sounds like a spoof, but they are dead serious!
And they won the election! 

Actually, the SNP won mainly because people were fed up with 
the left wing parties, so they stomped over to the redneck 
right-wing SNP. 

According to the polls, only aboot 25% of the Scotts would
actually get serious aboot considering a separation. 

However, 100% of them definitely want to rattle the Limey's
chains and use the threat of separation as a bargaining tool
for trying to get the North Sea oil and gas money. 
That is BIG money, and the Scotts are dead serious aboot it.

You won't read about it in the Enemy Times or other left wing
media for a while yet, but you can read up on it here at the

Have FUN!

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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Jennifer Poors, 25, in Bangor, Maine Bangor woman busted for stealing scented toilet paper holders BANGOR, Maine A Bangor woman was arrested about noon Tuesday on charges of violating the conditions of her release from a prior arrest, unlawful possession of scheduled drugs and theft after she allegedly attempted to steal two scented toilet paper holders from a Family Dollar store. After her arrest, Jennifer Poors, 25, was taken to Penobscot County Jail, where she remained Tuesday night, Bangor police Sgt. Larry Weber said, citing an arrest report. According to the report, Poors attempted to shoplift the items by removing them from their packaging and concealing them in a sweatshirt pocket. The report indicated that the roll holders were valued at about $1, Weber said. Poors, the report said, was out on bail from an arrest in Hancock County, where she was charged in connection with the theft of drugs from her mother, Weber said. He said that at the time of her arrest Tuesday, she was in possession of six 20 milligram dicyclomine pills. Dicyclomine is used to treat the symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome by relieving muscle spasms in the gastrointestinal tract. It is not a narcotic, Stealing a pair of toilet paper holdrs, worth under a dollar, while on condiional release and carrying drugs, is definitely a boneheaded idea.
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A housewife with four young daughters was getting dinner ready when the phone rang. The six-year-old picked it up and said, "Hi, Daddy!" and began telling him about her day. She then passed the phone to her next older sister as was the custom whenever Daddy called from work. When it was finally the wife's turn to talk she took the receiver and said, "Hi, hon." "Thank goodness, lady," the voice on the other end replied. "I just called to tell you that the wallpaper you ordered is here, but those girls think the phone goes one way only!"
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