Awkward computer switch 

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Good Morning,  !
It's Friday, June 24
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!

Ten years ago I predicted that soon computers will be compact
enough to fit into a keyboard. It didn't take too long for that to 
happen, but it took a while for Keyboard PCs to be come 
affordable. Today I saw some that were well under $500. 
Everything is inside the keyboard, except for the monitor.
You just plug your good ol monitor into it.

No, this is not an ad, and I am not suggesting you dump a 
working computer to make room for a Keyboard PC. However,
when the time comes to replace your computer, keep them 
in mind.

Have FUN!

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Good taste is the worst vice ever invented. --- Edith Sitwell In great affairs men show themselves as they wish to be seen; in small things they show themselves as they are. --- Nicholas Chamfort
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

A missionary heard about a native who had five wives. He paid a visit to the native's hut, and sure enough there were five wives. The two men sat outside the hut and talked. The missionery said "You are violating a law of God. Man can only have one wife, so you must go and tell four of those women that they can no longer live here or consider you their husband." The native thought a few moments, then said, "I'll wait here. You go tell 'em."
1st man: "I woke up this morning and felt so bad that I tried to kill myself by taking a thousand aspirin." 2nd man: "Oh really, what happened?" 1st man: "After the first two, I felt better."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Deanna Headley, 23, of Hollywood, Florida Shoplifter flees while carrying a 5 year old A woman is accused of putting her young daughter in harm's way by running from a security officer who was trying to stop the mother for shoplifting, according to the Police Department. Deanna Headley, 23, of Hollywood, was arrested on Tuesday after police said she dodged traffic and jumped into a lake, all while carrying her 5-year-old daughter, to avoid arrest. The daughter, who was not injured, was placed in the custody of the Department of Children & Families. Security officers at the Walmart at 2551 E. Hallandale Beach Blvd. watched via a surveillance camera on Tuesday afternoon as Deanna Headley stuffed about $300 worth of DVDs into a purse while her sister, Lorraine Headley, acted as a "look-out." When security officers approached the women and child as they were leaving, the women took off. Cradling her daughter like "a football," Deanna Headley ran across six lanes of traffic on busy Hallandale Beach Boulevard. When the security officer caught up to her, Headley knocked him down by striking him in the chest and went to the rooftop of a nearby apartment building, then came down and struck him in the chest again. Clutching her daughter, she then dove into a 15-foot-deep lake behind the building. Though yelling that she couldn't swim, Headley refused to hand over the little girl to police officers or the Walmart security person. Eventually, officials removed mother and daughter from the murky water. Neither was hurt. The paper did not say whether they had to harpoon the bonehead, or whether they used a lassoo. Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley referred to the police affidavit in bond court on Wednesday: "It says if not for the responding police units, as well as Walmart personnel pulling you from the water…it's very likely both of you would have drowned." "This was all over some DVDs from Walmart," Hurley said, noting that Headley also has a grand theft case pending in Palm Beach County. Deanna Headley was charged with committing a felony that could cause death, child abuse, strong arm robbery and battery. Lorraine Headley has not been charged, but police said the investigation is not over. Hurley ordered that Deanna Headley be held without bond. She may not have contact with her child. Citing a history with the Headley family, DCF spokesman Mark Riordan said the girl will likely be sent to foster care. "That child is at imminent risk and we will do anything in our power to protect her," he said.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Barbara Re: Idiotic computer button Dear Webby, I have to vent! How long have computers been made as under-the-desk towers? How many trillion times have people bashed their heads under the desk when turning a computer on? Why can't that stupid button be sticking out like a safety shut-off mushroom button or something, that can be kicked? I am sick up and fed with crawling under my desk every morning, and unless you have a solution, I am just going to leave my computer running forever. Barbara Dear Barbara Many years ago I drew up this little diagram and showed it here. You can glue that together from scraps of just about anything and glue it to the computer, so that the little round cardboard button fits onto the recessed computer switch. You can of course be creative and make your clapper in any shape you want, as long as it has a button hitting the recessed switch and is firmly glued on a few inches above it, so that it can flex enough to depress the switch, when you kick it. A pencil eraser glued to a plastic ruler works very well, and after I sent this picture out last time, somebody sent me a picture of a large cardboard valentines heart duck taped to the front of the computer and a small ball of used chewing gum lined up on the recessed switch. Have FUN! DearWebby
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"Grandma, how long have you and Grandpa been married?" asked young Nina. "Fifty years," Grandma replied. "That is so wonderful," exclaimed Nina. "And I bet in all that time, you never once thought about divorce, right?" "Right Nina. Divorce, NEVER. Murder, lots of times, but never divorce."
Daily tip from Put Leftover Ice in House Plants This is a little tip for people who like conserving energy and water. When there is ice left in the glasses after a meal, I always pop them altogether and then put that ice into the house plants rather just throw it down the drain. It is a shame to have used the electricity to make the cubes and then just throw them all away. Saves a bit of fresh water too! By Maura from New York, NY Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
Bob moved into an apartment and went shopping for cleaning equipment. His cart was loaded with a broom, mop, dust-pan, sponges and a full array of cleaning products. At the last minute he topped off his cart with a lone food purchase - a large bag of potato chips. Seeing the checkout clerk's quizzical look, he explained, "I'm a very messy eater."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Nine year old Little Johnny, was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday school. "Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission, to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge so that the cops could not follow them, and all the Israelites were saved." "Now, Johnny, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked, scornfully. "Well, no, Mom. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it."

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