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Good Morning,  !
Today is Saturday, July 9

Thank you  Corinne!

First a message from Ophelia:
Thank you Robert & Loretta, amd Karon & Charles! DearWebby gave me some cash from checks you had sent in for me. I would love to add you to the subscriber family, but neither your checks nor the envelopes they came in, have an email address on them. Please tell me as soon as possible, what address you want me to use for your subscription. Ophelia
Robert H (different Robert) pointed out that this months has some interesting peculiarities. Have a look! I added some color to make it more obvious: 5 Fridays 5 Saturdays 5 Sundays Apparently that happens only once every 823 years. I'll take his word for it, my memory does not go that far back any more. This year we're going to experience four unusual dates. 1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11, 11/11/11 and that's not all... Take the last two digits of the year in which you were born - now add the age you will be this year, For YOU, the results will be 111. For me too. And on November 11, at 11:11:11 AM, .... Have FUN! DearWebby
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Marriage teaches you loyalty, patience, understanding, perseverance, suffering and a lot of other virtues you wouldn't need if you had stayed single. --- Socratex
Do you want to reverse your electrical meter and power bill? You CAN! Legally! Not a sneaky gimmick, not turning things off or down, just simple know-how. The Power 4 Home system shows and explains every step. If you are still paying for electricity, then this is for YOU!

Thanks to Sandie for this story: Two buddies are fishing, but they haven't caught anything all day. Then another fisherman walks by with a huge load of fish. They ask him, "Excuse me, but where did you get all those fish?" The other fisherman replies," If you just go up the stream until the water isn't salty, there are a ton of hungry fish." They thank him and go on their way. Fifteen minutes later, one fisherman says to the other, "Fill the bucket up with water and see if the water is salty." He dips the bucket in the stream and drinks some. "Nope. Still salty." Thirty minutes later, he asks him to check again. "Nope, still salty." One hour later, they check again. "Nope. Still salty." "This isn't good," the fisherman finally says. "We have been walking for almost two hours and the water is still salty!" "I know," says the other. "And the bucket is almost empty!"
A small boy was looking at the red ripe tomatoes growing in the farmer's garden. "I'll give you my two pennies for that tomato," said the boy pointing to a beautiful, large, ripe fruit hanging on the vine. "No," said the farmer, "I get a dime for a tomato like that one." The small boy pointed to a smaller green one, "Will you take two pennies for that one?" "Yes," replied the farmer, "I'll give you that one for two cents." "OK," said the lad, sealing the deal by putting the coins in the farmer's hand, "I'll pick it up in about a week."
Thanks to Sue for forwarding this picture from her friend: Click through the picture to the large version. This Fledgling Easter King bird, took it's maiden flight this morning. After such a feat, it had to take a nap. Sue Click through the picture to the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Rhonda Hollander, 47 in Plantation, Florida Judge snapped pictures of men at urinal Traffic court judge Rhonda Hollander reportedly admitted to snapping pictures of men at urinals in her courthouse. A Florida traffic court judge was busted after a man told police that she used her cell phone to take pictures of him standing at a courthouse urinal, authorities said. Traffic court judge Rhonda Hollander reportedly admitted to snapping pictures of men at urinals in her courthouse. A Florida traffic court judge was busted after a man told police that she used her cell phone to take pictures of him standing at a courthouse urinal, authorities said. Rhonda Hollander, 47, was arrested last week after her kooky candid camera shots inside the men's room at the West Regional Courthouse, according to the Broward County Sheriff's Office. A report of the encounter says Willie Jackson Jr. was "getting ready to urinate" when Hollander appeared at the adjoining urinal and began snapping away. She then took photos of another man entering the restroom before she bolted, ducking inside another judge's chambers. Police were summoned and quickly located Hollander, who admitted taking the pictures. But the judge refused to surrender her cell phone, insisting "it was a public restroom and that she was not breaking any kind of laws," the report said. Hollander then started snapping pictures of the arresting officer - and bit his finger when he pointed at her and ordered the judge to stop shooting, the report said. The snapshots led to a mug shot, and Hollander was eventually released on $700 bail for resisting an officer, assault on an officer and obstruction with violence
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Suryakant Re: Part of newsletter hidden Dear Webby, I have a new computer with Windows 7 installed. When I open Humor Letter, to my dismay, I get only half of it and not the full Text. Usually it gets cut off in the middle of the picture. Is it a problem with the settings of W7? I go to browser (IE) for your website, click on Humor and I get the complete letter. But I get only the latest one. If I have missed yesterday’s letter, I don’t get it on your site. Suryakant Dear Suryakant Looks like you received the complete newsletter, but that your email program is only displaying part of it. Try hitting REPLY or FORWARD. Quite possibly that will reveal all of it, since it IS there. I have no idea which email program you use, so I can't really google for a solution. Previous issues are archived in the Blog at http://webby.com/humor/blog Have FUN! DearWebby
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Todd's wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asked, "Darling, honestly, what age would you say I am?" Looking over her carefully, Todd replied, "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty five." "Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed. "Hey, wait a minute!" Todd interrupted. "I haven't added them up yet."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Saving Money on Baking Soda I buy baking soda by the bag at Costco. I have one in the laundry room but don't need it taking up space in the kitchen and each bathroom. After washing and drying the plastic containers from flavored coffee creamers, I slit the labels to remove and mark the bottles accordingly with a Sharpie. They're easy to fill with a funnel and the pour top allows me to sprinkle as needed. There's one under each sink and the big bag is convenient for refills on a shelf in the garage. By mountainbrd from NJ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Steinberg and Goldmann, partners in the garment industry had just suffered through their worst season ever. Ten thousand madras sports coats were hanging on the rack unsold, and bankruptcy was looming closer. Out of the blue, in walked a buyer from Australia. "I say there," he began, "you boys wouldn't have any madras sports coats, would you? I've been looking for them everywhere." Steinberg said there MIGHT be a few left, and soon a deal was made whereby the ten thousand jackets would be shipped to Australia at a handsome $250 profit, each. "There is one thing though," said the Australian buyer. "For an order this large, I'll have to get a confirmation from my home office. I don't anticipate any problem, and unless I send you a telegram by this Friday, the deal goes through as planned." Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday passed slowly, with the partners nervously waiting to see if the Australian would change his mind. Friday morning went by without incident. Steinberg and Goldmann were closing up shop when, at ten minutes to five, there was a knock on the door: ..."Telegram!" The partners froze. Trembling, Goldmann grabbed the telegram and opened it. Suddenly, his face lit up. "Steinberg, GREAT NEWS! Your sister died!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they don't recognize you.

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