You Know It's Time to Diet When... 

- You dance and it makes the band skip.

- You are diagnosed with the flesh eating virus, and the doctor gives you 22 more years to live.

- You put mayonnaise on an aspirin.

- You go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts.

- Your driver's license says, "Picture continued on other side."

- You ran away and they had to use all four sides of the milk carton   for your picture.

- You learn you were born with a silver shovel in your mouth.

- You could sell shade.

- Your blood type is Ragu.

- You need an appointment to attend an 'open house'.




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