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Good Morning,  !
Today is Wednesday, October 5

Thank you Ivan!

From Maureen

Dear Webby
My 5 year old son Thor is just starting to read,
and he saw that Limerick at the bottom of your newsletter,
while I was talking with some visiting friends.

The thunder god went for a ride,
upon his favorite filly.
"I'm Thor," he cried.
The horse replied,
"You forgot your thaddle, thilly."

Naturally, he spotted his name from a distance and had
to go and read it. When he read it aloud, we all cracked
up and nearly bust a gut. He didn't quite get it, but he sure
relished the reaction he got, and quoted it to anybody and 
everybody, who would stand still long enough, for the rest
of the day. I'm sure he will remember that for the rest of
his life!

Have FUN!

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Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. --- Ernest Benn The higher the buildings, the lower the morals. --- Noel Coward
And what was the culmination of events that led you to file this action," asked the man's attorney in the divorce hearing. "All through our marriage my wife was less than reasonably responsive to my sexual initiatives," replied the husband, "but the clincher came one morning at the breakfast table." "Why? What happened?" "She announced, 'Just so you don't get your hopes up, I will be having a headache all weekend.'" --------------- Abstinence makes the heart go wander.
If you want to make some money on the side,
now you can use the GTR Money Machine

The minister's little six-year-old girl had been so naughty during the week, that her mother decided to give her the worst kind of punishment. She told her she couldn't go to the Sunday School Picnic on Saturday. When the day came, her mother felt she had been too harsh and changed her mind. When she told the little girl she could go to the picnic, the child's reaction was one of gloom and unhappiness. "What's the matter? I thought you'd be glad to go to the picnic." her mother said. "It's too late!" the little girl said. "I've already prayed for a snowstorm!"
Tanks to Betty for this picture: Click through for the big picture.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD goes to Maykel Calafet Calderon, 28, and Manuel I. Telles, 38, both Cuban natives living in Miami Owner tracks stolen boat 2,500 miles away JACKSONVILLE, Fla. (UPI) -- The owner of a powerboat stolen in Florida was 2,500 miles away in Nevada but was still able to tell police where the stolen craft was headed, authorities said. A Global Positioning System device on the 32-foot, $260,000 boat told the owner through his cellphone, that the craft, stolen Wednesday in Jacksonville, Fla., was being hauled north on Interstate 95 in Brevard County, Florida Today reported. With help from a police helicopter, deputies located the stolen Ford F-250 towing the 2009 Yellowfin Yachts Center Console and arrested two men, after they exited the interstate. Maykel Calafet Calderon, 28, and Manuel I. Telles, 38, both Cuban natives living in Miami, were arrested on charges of theft. "The owner giving us updates was by far the thing that assisted us the most," Todd Holland of the Brevard County Sheriff's Office said.
From the Tech Support Pits: From: Ed Re: Text too large Dear Webby The text is so big it fills my screen twice! How can I reduce it to human size? Thanx, Ed Dear Ed Hold down the CTRL key and scroll the mouse wheel. In one direction it increases the ZOOM, in the other it decreases it. Just find a comfortable setting. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Here is an annual favorite. You have to read it out loud! "Information? I need the number of the Caseway Insurance Company." "Would you spell that, please?" "Certainly. C as in cue. A as in aye. S as in sea. E as in eye. W as in why. A as in are. Y as in you." "Just a minute, sir. I'll connect you with my supervisor."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Hide Important Numbers in Cell Phone Contacts With so many numbers to remember, here's a great way to keep it simple. If you have a number that is difficult to remember: a pin number, lock combination or ID number, hide it on your phone! Make an entry in your cell phone's contact list for a made-up name. (Make sure you won't confuse it with someone else!) Turn the number into a phone number. Place it at the front, middle or end of the number, put it in backwards or make it only every other number for extra security. Log it as your "friend's" number. This way, you'll have it at hand without giving it away. Even if your phone is lost or stolen, no one will know your secret. Don't have a cell? Use the same trick to add the number to your address book! By Anda from Knoxville, TN http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Thanks to Bea for this one: On my 15th birthday, I opened a package from my mom and sister. Out came a beauty case containing samples of my very own makeup. "Oh, neat," my dad said excitedly, "a tackle box!" My mother and sister explained that it was a beauty kit, not a tackle box. As I opened it up and showed everyone the eye shadow, mascara, and rouge, my father leaned over to my mother and whispered, "I told you it was a tackle box. Just look at all those lures."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
The man told his doctor that he just wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English... What's wrong with me?" "Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're simply a lazy old fart." "Thank you for your candor," said the man. "Now give me the latin term, so that I have something to tell my wife!"

Young @ Heart Thrills

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