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Good Morning,  !
Today is Wednesday, December 21
Happy Hanukkah!

There is no Gullible Warming in Europe either. It is still
snowing, though some Foehn, their equivalent of our Chinook,
is forecast for Christmas.

Large parts of Europe still believe in Gullible Warming, 
or use that hoax as an excuse for not being prepared to clear
snow like they used to, before the warming ripple.

Of course, the older people claim, that they always used to
get a lot of snow now and then, but that in THEIR days,
there was a lot less incompetence and laziness.
Hmmmm, seems I have heard that before.

The Algorians now claim that Gullible Warming causes colder
weather. And the old folks claim it causes general incompetence
and laziness. I wonder if I could get a grant to study that, 
or wether I would have to become a Democrat first?

Have FUN!
DearWebby

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"It's not so much how busy you are, but why you are busy. The bee is praised. The mosquito is swatted." --- Mary O'Connor It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver. --- Mohandas Gandhi
Two women came before wise King Solomon, dragging between them a young man. "This young man agreed to marry my daughter," said one. "No! He agreed to marry MY daughter," said the other. And so they haggled before the King, until he called for silence. "Bring me my biggest sword," said Solomon, "and I shall hew the young man in half. Each of you shall receive a half." "Sounds good to me," said the first lady. But the other woman said, "Oh Sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman's daughter marry him." The wise king did not hesitate a moment. "The young man must marry the first woman's daughter," he proclaimed. "But she was willing to hew him in two!" exclaimed the king's court. "Indeed," said wise King Solomon. "That shows she is the TRUE mother-in-law."
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"I have to tell the truth," a young man said to his new girlfriend. "While we've been dating, I've been secretly seeing a psychiatrist." "Don't worry about it," the girl told her boyfriend. "I've been secretly seeing a lawyer and a car salesman."
From Guinn re yesterday's picture: Hi, Webby. The falls picture in today's Webby column Is Multnoma Falls, just a few miles east of Portland, Oregon and was the subject of my first landscape picture, way back in 1946! I took my picture with a Kodak Bantam but did not smear the water this much, which made for a better picture. Guinn Click through for the large version.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Simone Paolercio, 39, Lakeland, Florida Lakeland teacher Simone Paolercio arrested for battery on McDonald's employee LAKELAND, Florida -- The Polk County Sheriff's Office has arrested a Lakeland teacher for battery after she allegedly threw food at a McDonald's employee. According to investigators, 39-year-old Simone Paolercio was in the drive-thru of a McDonald's on South Florida Avenue Saturday morning when she got into a dispute with the window attendant over her order. They say Paolercio demanded a refund. When the manager refused, she allegedly threw the food through the window, striking the attendant in the face and chest. Paolercio fled the restaurant in her car. The incident was of course captured on store video surveillance. Paolercio was located by deputies at her home, arrested without incident, and booked into the Polk County Jail on a battery charge. She told deputies she is currently a teacher at Lakeland Highlands Middle School.
Tech Support Pits: From: Susan Re: Auto-Repondres Dear Webby, Hi there, your daily letter is not only funny but invariably useful tech-wise! As always, many thanks (and a question, of course)! Is there an auto-responder software that you recommend? I only want it for the two months this summer when we will be out of the country and away from e-mail (yay). Any thoughts on this will be much appreciated! Thanks, Susan Dear Susan How do YOU feel aubout the nuisance auto-crappers of pretentious snoots, who act as if you care whether or not they answer immediately or three weeks later? Has it ever occurred to you, that other people feel exactly the same way about it, and many of them use their MailWasher to not only filter them into the trash, unseen, on the server, without even downloading them, but they also black-list the address, that had sent the auto-crappers. Yes, the reason I call them that, is because a few Thousand readers do that, and I don't want their anti-spam programs to blacklist me. Just send ONE email to your friends and acquaintances, and tell them, that you will be away from your regular computer until your return date. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Old Johann Muller was a minister in a small German town. He had always been a good man and lived by the Bible. One day God decided to reward him, with the answer to any three questions Johann Muller would like to ask. Old Johann Muller did not need much time to consider, and the first question was: "Will there ever be married Catholic priests?" God promptly replied: "Not in your life-time." Johann Muller thought for a while, and then came up with the second question: "what about female priests then, will we have those one day?" Again God had to disappoint Old Johann Muller: "Not in your life-time, I'm afraid." Johann Muller was sorry to hear that, and he decided to drop the subject. After having though for a while, he asked the last question: "Will there ever be another German pope?" God answered quickly and with a firm voice, "Not in My life time."
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Plastic Lids Work as Small Dry Eraser Boards Margarine or butter container lids make great dry erase boards. You can use washable markers on them or dry erase markers on them. I cut the rim off of the top of the margarine container lid, made a hole with an icepick and then put a twist tie through the hole and then clothes pinned it to the kitchen blinds. By Robyn from Hampton http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
The case concerned a will and Kelly was a witness. The attorney asked:"Was the deceased in the habit of talking to himself when he was alone?" "I don't know," said Kelly. "Come now man, you don't know and yet you pretend you were intimately acquainted with the deceased?" "Well, Mr. Bozo," said Kelly, "I never happened to be with him when he was alone. "
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the doctor, "Why do you want to join the Navy, son?" "My father said it'd be a good idea, sir." "Oh? And what does your father do?" "He's in the Army, sir."
Mrs Claus's Kitchen





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