Moving file cabinets 



Zoom the font size for best readability  
Good Morning,  !
Today is Tuesday, December 27

Somehow, seeing the news in a foreign language, 
yes German now seems foreign to me, makes  them seem
unreal, like entertainment, an inclusion in a movie, that the
movie heroes are watching. 

That is no problem, I usually take the news with a bit of salt
anyway, to subtract the slant, that the reporters put on them.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Democracy means government by discussion, but it is only effective if you can stop people talking. --- Clement Atlee What others think of us would be of little moment did it not, when known, so deeply tinge what we think of ourselves. --- Paul Valery I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it. --- Jack Handey He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever. -- Chinese Proverb
When my granddaughter, Marissa, was 4 yrs. old, we were waiting in the car at the school to pick up her brother, Michael, and her cousin, Mark. Marissa was sitting in the back seat of the car, eating gummy bears candies and said to me, "Mimi, guess what color I am eating now!" Of course, since I was looking in the rear view mirror, told her each and every color she was eating. Marissa was so surprised, she asked, "How do you know what color the candy is?" I told her that I was a psychic. Two days later, while in the middle of driving, she again asked me what color candy she was eating. This time I couldn't keep on looking in the mirror, so I just guessed any color. Marissa then said, "Oh, Mimi, I guess you're not a psycho anymore."
Over 70 Guilt-Free Chocolate Recipes They Are All Original, Rich, Raw Delicious & Unbelievably Healthy Yet So Easy To Make! Our original chocolate recipes have all the delicious flavor,smoothness and decadence of what you love about chocolate, but with an amazing twist. Get the Guilt-Free Chocolate Recipes!
Don't worry about messing up on those great chocolate recipes and gaining a pound. You won't because of THOSE! They are fool-proof. However, since you are likely to gain a few pounds between now and the time you make your new Year's resolutions, just because of the unhealthy stuff other people foist upon you, I will bring back the Guilt-Free Cooking link on New Year's Day, and keep it up there for a week. These books make great last minute or LATE Christmas presents! In case you REALLY cram on the pounds, or meet somebody, whom you want to impress, I still got access to the Fat Burning Furnace method, and will bring that link back on Jan 1 as well. So, enjoy the holidays and don't worry! It's quite OK to gain a fe pounds for a couple more days before the big weigh-in on New Year's Eve. That will give you that much more weight, that you can easily shed in the New Year with those books.
Martin had just received his brand new drivers license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver. "I'll bet you're back there to get a change of scenery after all those months of sitting in the front passenger seat teaching me how to drive," says the beaming boy to his father. "Nope," comes dad's reply, "I'm gonna sit here and kick and knee the back of your seat as you drive, just like you've been doing to me all these years."
Click through for the large version.
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Jacquetta Simmons, 26 in Batavia, NY Woman accused of punching Walmart greeter BATAVIA, N.Y. A woman spent her Christmas in jail, after she punched a Walmart greeter as she left the store on Christmas Eve. Jacquetta Simmons, 26, was charged with two counts of second- degree assault, State Police Trooper Tracy Patterson said. She faces a second count because the victim, Grace Suozzi, 70, is older than 65. Patterson said Simmons is accused of punching and knocking down Suozzi at 11:23 a.m. after the employee asked Simmons to see receipts for items the customer was carrying in store bags. After hitting Suozzi, Simmons ran out of the store, but employees and customers quickly surrounded her until police arrived. Suozzi suffered fractures to the left side of her face and significant swelling, Patterson said. Simmons on Sunday was being held in Genesee County Jail in lieu of $20,000 bail. Patterson said Simmons did have receipts for everything in her bags and must have forgotten, that she did not have to run.
Tech Support Pits: From: Anna Re: Moving file cabinets Dear Webby, I need to move a couple of file cabinets temporarily to make room for the New Year's Eve festivities. What's the best way of doing that without scratching up the hardwood floor? Thanks Anna Dear Anna Get a welcome mat or a small piece of rug about the same size as a door mat. Bathroom ruglets work fine. Tilt the file cabinet sideways and kick the ruglet underneath it. Use a large wooden spoon to move the cabinets apart and away from the wall. Use some rope or strong string and make a lassoo or noose and slide it over the file cabinet and down to just a finger's width above the floor. With that you can now easily and safely tow the file cabinet around. When you get it near the intended location, avoid back injuries by sitting on the floor and pushing the cabinet the last foot or so with your feet. If the cabinet has to go to an area where you have carpet, use a plastic sheet like the "Magic Carpets" that the kids use for sliding down snowy hills. Have FUN! DearWebby
AD #2
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
A teacher asked her students to draw a picture of their favorite Old Testament story, and as she moved around the class, she saw there were many wonderful drawings being done. Then she came across Johnny who had drawn a man driving an antique car. In the back seat were two passengers, both scantily dressed. "It's a lovely picture," said the teacher, "but which story does it tell?" Johnny seemed surprised at the question. "Well," he exclaimed, "it says in the BIBLE, that God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury?" Then he added proudly, "And THAT is THE real and original Plymouth Fury! Uncle Bubba has it on blocks in front of his trailer!"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Freeze Excess Cranberries Cranberries are cheapest now, and unavailable at many times of the year. Buy extra and just stick them in the freezer as is. Frozen berries can be used in all recipes calling for fresh. By Linda from Vista, CA http://www.thriftyfun.com/ Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
A doctor sees an old man walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm. The next time the old man had an appointment, the doc says, "You're really doing great, aren't you?" "Just doing what you told me, Doctor. Get a hot mamma and be cheerful." "I didn't say that... I said, You've got a heart murmur, be careful!" "Too late!", the old man cackled, "I'm doing just fine with MY interpretation. YOU can try yours!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
A lady was exasperated with her younger sister, who bought an unreliable car and called for a ride every time it broke down. One day the lady got yet another one of those calls from her sister and said in disgust, "What happened this time?" "My brakes went out," her sister said. "Can you come to get me?" "Where are you?" the lady asked. Her sister said, "I'm in the drugstore." The lady asked, "And where's the car?" "It's in here with me."
Susan's 5 year old daughter Kim somehow had sensed that the new pastor seemed to be very fond of Susan and tried to do some inquisitive prying. She asked her mother why she didn't have a boyfriend. Susan was just recovering from some minor surgery and spent most of the day in bed. She told Kim the TV was her boyfriend, he entertained her all the time. The TV set was old and would just shut itself off for no reason. Susan usually just gave it a few hard wacks on the side and it would come back on, it was no big deal to her. Then the pastor stopped by to check on her recovery and Kim answered the door. At that time Susan was again trying to get the TV to come back on. The pastor, on hearing the noise, asked Kim if Susan was busy. Kim replied, "No, sir, she is just in the bedroom banging her boyfriend".
Diet be damned





[ view entry ] ( 183 views )   |  permalink  |  print article  |   ( 3.1 / 385 )

<<First <Back | 82 | 83 | 84 | 85 | 86 | 87 | 88 | 89 | 90 | 91 | Next> Last>>