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Good Morning,  !
Today is Thursday, February 2

Thank you John !
Thank you Eddie!

Have you seen Ophelia's new Recipe section?
Today she has two Rumb Ball recipes, the traditional Southern
version with icing sugar and corn syrup, 
and the leaner Northern version. The Northern version looks
like it is sfe for diabetics and for people, who want 
to lose weight. You can get somebody plastered with 
healthy diet (rum) balls.

let her know which version you prefer, and above all, 
let her know if you like the recipe addition.

Have FUN!

If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

A person who trusts no one can't be trusted. --- Jerome Blattner The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools. --- Doug Larson
Thanks to Cora for this story: I was inspecting communications facilities in Alaska. Since I had little experience in flying in small planes, I was nervous when we approached a landing strip in a snow-covered area. The pilot descended to just a couple hundred feet, then gunned both engines, climbed, and circled back. While my heart pounded, the passenger beside me seemed calm. "I wonder why he didn't land," I said. "He was checking to see if the landing strip was plowed," the man said. As we made a second approach, I glanced out the window. "It looks plowed to me," I commented. "No," my seat mate said, without looking out the window. "It hasn't been cleared for some time." "How can you tell?" I asked. "Because," the man informed me, "I'm the only one, who can get the snow plow started ." ------------- Planes in the Arctic often have skis mounted a bit higher than the wheels and have a hydraulic hand pump to pump them down when needed. Yes, you guessed it, that used to be my job, aside from loading and unloading, lying on top of the cargo during the sprint down the runway and scrambling to the front as soon as we were a foot above ground. Before landing on a lake or river, flying low over the landing area is mandatory. It blows loose snow away, and reveals snow drifts. A sneaky snow drift will cause the plane to suddenly nose over and look really embarrassing. When there is a certain type of overcast, it is impossible to see snowdrifts. Under those conditions, I had to toss out a plumb-bob on a hundred foot line and we did another turn to check the line it "wrote" into the snow. It sure revealed snow drifts!
Valentines is coming up! Guilt Day! If you don't have chocolate or one of the things from this book, you will be made to feel guilty!
Over 70 Guilt-Free Chocolate Recipes They Are All Original, Rich, Raw Delicious & Unbelievably Healthy Yet So Easy To Make! Our original chocolate recipes have all the delicious flavor,smoothness and decadence of what you love about chocolate, but with an amazing twist. Click on Guilt FREE Chocolate!

A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following weekend. "You see," he explained, "my wife's expecting." "Oh..." said the Officer, "I understand. Go ahead and tell your wife that I wish her luck." The following week the same soldier was back again with the same explanation: "My wife's expecting." The Officer looked surprised. "Still expecting?" he said, "Well, well, my boy, you must be pretty bothered. Of course you can have the week-end off." When the same soldier appeared again the third week, however, the Officer lost his temper. "Don't tell me your wife is still expecting!" he bellowed. "Yes sir!" said the soldier resolutely, "She's still expecting." "What in heaven is she expecting?" yelled the Officer. "Me." said the soldier simply.
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If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Hoons, 22, in Kadina, Australia Donut burner busted after posting video on YouTube A P-PLATE (Provisional License) driver who posted video of his antics on YouTube faces eight dangerous driving charges and losing his car forever. The 22-year-old from Kadina, on South Australia's Yorke Peninsula, has had his Holden Commodore impounded for 28 days, police said today. He was nabbed after footage of his alleged driving offences was uploaded to YouTube and police learned about his alleged behaviour on roads near Kadina. He will be summonsed to appear in court at a later date to face charges including driving in a dangerous manner, misuse of a motor vehicle and producing excessive noise and smoke, police said in a statement. Police will ask the court to have the car permanently forfeited. The man is the holder of a provisional license and will be subject to disqualification, police said. The driving is nothng outrageous, just a 22 year old acting like a kid and burning donuts with an old, rear-wheel drive car that has the rear brakes disconnected or worn out and a bad muffler, on a deserted country road. Here is the video It's just very tame, childish first gear donuts, not a big deal, and in most places the cops would just grin about the dumb kids destroying their tires on an out of the way, deserted country road. However, posting it on YouTube as a bad example for other idiots, who might try that in a McDonalds parking lot and knock over garbage cans, is a definite No-No!
Tech Support Pits:
Correction: Got the link to Mail Washer link fixed.
From: Daniel Re: Simple spam control
Dear Webby: hello my friend, just wanted to tell you i'm still voting and ask a question. is there a spam blocker that will block spam before it get's to your comp. but at the same time be simple enough for a computer illerate like myself to use? thanks, daniel Dear Daniel Yes, there sure is. Just click on the Mailwasher button on the right side menu here in the Humor Letter. I have used it for a many years now and would be lost without it. I have tested many others, but always keep coming back to MailWsher. Mailwasher makes it ridiculously easy to create filters, that catch stuff that is trying to sneak through it's own already built in defenses. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Thanks to Cora for this story: Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing. Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the car. Frantically I headed for the parking lot. My wife, Cora, has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty. I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all, “Honey,” I stammered. I always call her “honey” in times like these. “I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen.” There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard Cora’s voice, “Dumbo,” she barked, “I dropped you off!” Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, “Well, come and get me.” Cora retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this policeman that I have not stolen my car!”
Daily tip from Organizing Curling Irons With teen girls in the house, it is a pain to keep curling irons, hair dryers, and flat irons tidy. I had an extra clean wastebasket (the small kind) and had an idea. It fits under my sink and I stand all of the above appliances inside. What a help! :) By Carol from Landisville, PA Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
"Dear Lord", the pastor began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face. "Without you we are but dust. . " He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter (who was listening!) leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little girl voice, "Dad, what is 'butt dust' ?"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Officers at a military installation were being lectured about a new computer. The training officer said the computer was able to withstand nuclear and chemical attacks, was shock proof to 60 G, could be driven over and even dropped from a plane. Suddenly, he saw that one of the officers had a cup of coffee and yelled, "There will be no eating or drinking in this room! You'll have to get rid of that coffee." The officer said meekly, "Sure, but why?" "Because a coffee spill will ruin the keyboard !"
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