Forcing Outlook and Outlook Express to show pictures 

Zoom the font size for best readability  
Good Morning,  !

Today is Sunday, February 12
Vision is still a strain, but now t feels just like I was 
wearing somebody elses glasses, and that, with the proper
glasses, I could see OK.

Have FUN!

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Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish. --- Euripides A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election. --- Bill Vaughan
The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me." "Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just a lazy old fart." "Okay," said the man. "Now give me the latin term so I can tell my wife."
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Cindy noticed her husband standing on the bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. She commented, "I don't think that's going to help." "Sure it does." he said. "It's the only way I can see the numbers."
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Dalisha Adams, 26, in Brooklyn, NY Abandoned toddlers at busy intersection Brooklyn, New York (The Weekly Vice) Dalisha Adams, a 26-year old Brooklyn woman was jailed Sunday after she dumped her two young daughters onto the street before driving off. According to Brooklyn police, Adams reportedly left her two daughters, ages 2 and 3, on the street around 3:00 p.m.. Police were dispatched to the scene after receiving a 911 from and elderly couple who found the children standing alone next to a busy intersection. The New York City Administration for Children's Services (ACS) was able to identify Adams and her children through pictures previously taken of them. Investigators say the children were found near their grandmother's residence, however the grandmother was unaware that the children had been abandoned. She told police that she had no idea that the girls had been left alone until she saw their photographs on a local news station. She is now attempting to gain full custody of the girls, who were taken to the Brookdale University Hospital for observation, and then placed in protective custody with ACS. Adams' neighbors say they regularly heard Adams berating her daughters, cussing and shouting at them with foul- mouthed rants that could be heard throughout the apartment complex. They say Adams blew up at the girls a short time before they were discovered abandoned, shouting "Stop crying. Shut the (expletive) up. I'm going to get you out of here." Adams was booked into jail and charged with child endangerment.
Tech Support Pits: From: Connie Re: No pictures in mail Dear Webby Lately I have been receiving attachments and pictures and all I can see on them is a red X in the corner. Why can't I see them? Connie Dear Corrine Sounds like you are handicapped with Outloock Express. That's just some settings in Outloock Express. I don't allow Outloock Express within 10 feet of any Webby machine, but I found an answer with Google: To re-enable the images and external content in HTML e-mail, use the following steps. Open Outlook Express. In Outlook Express, from the Tools menu, click Options. In the Options dialog box, click the Security tab, and then take the checkmark off the line that says: "Block images and other external content in HTML e-mail" There might be more Outluck settings you have to check, but that one seems to have helped most people. Have FUN! DearWebby
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The little daughter of a lieutenant answered a telephone call while her parents were out. A man called, identifying himself as Colonel Hendrick. She asked if he would please spell the name slowly. He said, "H as in horse, E as in egg, N as in nose, D as in doggie, R as in rabbit, I as in Indian, C as in cat, K as in kite." When her father returned, he found the following message: "Daddy, call Colonel Horseeggnosedoggierabbitindiancatkite."
Daily tip from Create Stick Sculptures to Attract Birds This tip is "for the birds" in your garden. I don't throw away large sticks that fall during storms, instead I keep them and use them to make stick sculptures for the birds. They add whimsy to my garden and the birds LOVE to land on them because after all they are sticks from real trees. I started with a plain garden hook and just attached the sticks as I found them and it's an ever changing sculpture. You can add birdhouses or anything you want to, but I guarantee you that the birds will land on it and land on it often! By Jeanasina from Richfield, MN Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
A Classic! A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York, where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is comprised of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building. So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs. The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up she goes. The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids. The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further up?" And up she goes again. The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking. "Hmmm,............. better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?" So she ascends another flight of stairs. The fourth floor sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework. "Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more, further up!" And again she heads up another flight. The fifth floor sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic lovers. "Oh, mercy me! But just think ... what must be awaiting me on the last floor?" So up to the sixth floor she goes. The sixth floor sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 3,456,789,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping Husband Mart and have a nice day. Just for fun, they opened a wife store across the street. On the first floor, the sign read: These women love cooking and sex and speak only sign language. The deep dust on the stairs to the second floor has never been disturbed yet.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
When I got out of the Navy I answered a want-ad for a forklift operator at a soft-drink bottling company. I was taken on a tour of the plant by the warehouse foreman who stressed how important it was not to break any bottles. "In the Navy," I explained, "I wasn't allowed any mistakes with the forklift either." "What did you handle?" "Bombs."
Stunning Tree Lined Street

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