Problems with wide monitor 

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Good Morning,  !
Today is Wednesday, April 11

Thank you John B!

I went to the Dollar Store to get coffee filters, and as usual,
had a quick look around. There are always some chuckles.
Today's chuckle was a USB powered keyboard vaccuum cleaner.
I din't buy it, of course. Since I stopped smoking over a 
year ago, my keyboard does not need daily vacuuming any more,
but it was funny to see a little USB powered vacuum cleaner
priced at $1.

Have FUN!

Today in 
1814 1st abdication of France by Napoleon; he is exiled to Elba 
1848 Hungary becomes constitutional monarchy under king Ferdinand of Austria
1895 Anaheim completes its new electric light system
1900 US Navy's 1st submarine made its debut 
1906 Einstein introduces his Theory of Relativity
1939 Hungary leaves League of Nations
1941 Germany blitzes Conventry, England 
1944 RAF bombs census bureau in The Hague
1945 Allies liberate abandoned Buchenwald Nazi concentration camp 
1950 Prince Rainier III becomes ruler of Monaco
1950 US B-29 bomber shot down above Latvia
1951 President Harry Truman fires General Douglas McArthur 
1956 French government sends 200,000 reservists to Algeria
1960 1st US weather satellite launched (Tiros 1) 
1965 40 tornadoes strike US midwest killing 272 & injuring 5,000 
1970 Apollo 13 launched to Moon; unable to land, returns in 6 days
1977 Ireland sets fishing zone at 50 mile 
1979 Ugandan dictator Idi Amin overthrown; Tanzania takes Kampala
1992 Euro-Disney opens near Paris France
2012  smiled

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Autobiography is an unrivaled vehicle for telling the truth about other people. --- Philip Guedalla "It is well enough that the people of this nation do not understand our banking and monetary system, for if they did, I believe there would be a revolution before tomorrow morning." --- Henry Ford
Thanks to Walter, the Stonecarver from for this story: A minister in a little church announced from the pulpit, "Now, before we pass the collection plate, I would like to request that the person who stole the chickens from Brother Martin's hen house please refrain from giving any money to the Lord. The Lord doesn't want money from a thief." That week for the first time in months, everyone gave.
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My home church welcomes all denominations, but mainly they prefer tens and twenties.
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Tammy Roseman, 40, in Vero beach, Florida Naked and drunk again VERO BEACH, Fla. (UPI) -- Florida authorities say a woman offered them no good explanation for her being naked in a parked car. An Indian River County deputy sheriff found Tammy Roseman "au naturel" in the front seat of her boyfriend's car while investigating a disturbance in Vero Beach on the afternoon of March 23. "I inquired why she was in a parked vehicle without any clothes at this time of day," a report states. She could offer no explanation. The investigator deduced alcohol probably had something to do with the situation and busted her for disorderly intoxication. Roseman's boyfriend told deputies the nudity didn't begin in the car. He said he came home earlier in the day and found her naked, drunk and busting up the place. The TC Palm said the arrest was not the first for the 40-year-old Roseman that involved public exposure. She was busted last year for allegedly dropping her pants as a school bus full of elementary kids passed by, and another time for walking in front of a busy mall showing off her breasts.
Tech Support Pits: From: Rose Re: Problem with wide (sawed off) monitor I have a new Dell monitor. My pictures and games are all too wide. How can I change the settings to make them normal. Rose Dear Rose Sounds like you chose to disregard my suggestions, and selected a "sawed off" monitor, that has the bottom third missing. They DO sell 4:3 monitors at DELL, for example the Dell UltraSharp 2007FP 20.1'' LCD Monitor, but you can find a lot better deals from other companies. If you choose to keep the "sawed off" monitor, you will just have to get used to the bottom third sawed off. Lots of people got used to that. Just set the resolution to the best your computer and your monitor can handle, and get used to not having that bottom third. If you look for 4:3 monitors at Pricegrabber, you can find some beautiful monitors at surprisingly low cost. I bought my 1600 x 1200 Lenovo monitor there a few years ago for $199, and am VERY happy with it. By the way, with monitors don't hesitate to buy "Refurb" units. They are usually returns because they were too large and would not fit into somebody's hutch desk, or some other silly reason. They will be just like brand new, but most likely in non-standard packaging. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Taxiing down the tarmac, the jet abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hour long wait, it finally took off. A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What was the problem?" "The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine," she explained. "It's OK now. It just took a while to find a pilot who is deaf."
Daily tip from Summer Fun Box School is almost out! A great surprise gift idea for elementary-aged children, grandchildren, or nieces and nephews is a 'Summer of Fun' surprise package. Try to think of all the things you loved as a child. Your grandchild, child or niece/nephew will probably have a little of you in them. I did this last summer and my granddaughter was absolutely delighted! Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
"Hey Bubba, what do you think about gun control?" "Well, Betty-Sue, it means yall have to use both hands."
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Liz goes to her first show at an art gallery and is looking at the paintings. One is a huge canvas that has black with yellow blobs of paint splattered all over it. The next painting is a murky gray color that has drips of purple paint streaked across it. Liz walks over to the artist and says, "I don't understand your paintings." "I paint what I feel inside me," explains the artist. "Have you ever tried Alka-Seltzer?"
Optical Illusions

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