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Good Morning,  !

Today is Friday,May 11
Time to wear a bit of red to show your support for the troops!



Thank you, Robert!

I woke up to a blizzard again, and 3 inches of fresh snow.
The blizzard left and by 9 am the sky was clear. It was so
bright out with the May sun on the fresh snow, that it hurt
my eyes. However,the hike up to the hospital and back was 
quite enjoyable.

I read an interesting article, that tried to explain why Alaska
and Canada had a record cold winter, and why Alaska and
the arctic ocean got more ice than normal, with the Bering 
still choked up with ice, while the lower 48 states had a 
warm and short winter. They claimed that the big North was
under thousands of years old cyclical effects, whereas the
comparatively small South was showing the effects of 
man-made gullible warming, and that the lower ocean levels
in Florida are due to the Alaskans and Canadians hogging
all the ice.

I guess you got to be a believer for it to make sense to you.
It is still amusing, though.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

Today in 
1189 Emperor Frederik I Barbarossa & 100,000 crusaders depart Regensburg
1330 Constantinople (Istanbul) becomes new capital 
 for Eastern Roman Empire 
1421 Jews are expelled from Styria
1751 1st US hospital founded (Pennsylvania Hospital)
1752 1st US fire insurance policy issued (Philadelphia) 
1792 Columbia River discovered & named by US Captain Robert Gray 
1812 Waltz introduced into English ballrooms - Most observers 
consider it disgusting & immoral. No wonder it caught on! 
1814 Americans defeat British at Battle of Plattsburgh 
1818 Cincinnati Reds Hod Eller no-hits St Louis Cardinals, 6-0
1833 "Lady-of-the-Lake" strikes iceberg & sinks in N Atlantic; kills 215 
1850 Work starts on 1st brick building in San Fransisco 
1916 Einstein's Theory of General Relativity presented 
1921 Tel Aviv is 1st all Jewish municipality 
1928 General Electric opens 1st TV-station (Schenectady NY)
1929 1st regularly scheduled TV broadcasts (3 nights per week)
1931 Credit-Anstalt, Austria's largest bank, fails 
beginning financial collapse of Central Europe 
1942 Japanese troops conquer Kalewa 
1943 US 7th division lands on Attu, Aleutian
1947 BF Goodrich manufactures 1st tubeless tire, Akron OH 
1949 1st Polaroid camera sold $89.95 (NYC)
1951 Jay Forrester patents computer core memory
1955 Israel attacks Gaza 
1962 US sends troops to Thailand 
1967 100,000,000th US phone connected 
1978 Margaret A Brewer is 1st female general in the US Marine Corps 
1987 1st heart-lung transplant take place (Baltimore) 
1989 President Bush orders nearly 2,000 troops to Panamá 
2012  smiled

Have FUN!
DearWebby


If you can help with the cost of the Humor Letter, please donate what you can!

Few people can see genius in someone who has offended them. --- Robertson Davies "I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day." --- E. B. White "With 60 staring me in the face, I have developed inflammation of the sentence structure and a definite hardening of the paragraphs." --- James Thurber "I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a "learning experience." Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a "learning experience." It makes me feel less stupid." --- P. J. O'Rourke
Need to fix a birth certificate? Learn Photoshop in a Day!



"NEXT," the conference emcee announced, "we have the Chief of the State Patrol, Roger Ledding, who is here with his lovely wife, Beverly." The chief took his place at the lectern. "I'm a little nervous," he began, "getting up before this distinguished audience and speaking today. But not nearly as nervous as I will be tonight when I must go home with my wife, *Audrey*, and try to explain Beverly to her!"
Need to cure Registry Problems? With Windows 7 that is even more important. Get RegCure

One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher. Finally, after he bid way more than he intended, he won the bid - the parrot was his at last! As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can't talk!" "Don't worry," said the auctioneer, "He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"
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If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter, please vote for it at the Ezine Finder: Thanks for your votes!

An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Andres Martinez, 24, Man led police on low-speed chase while rolling a joint HOUSTON (UPI) -- Houston police said they arrested an intoxicated man accused of leading officers on a low-speed chase and attempting to run over an officer. Police said Andres Martinez, 24, led police on a 20-minute low-speed chase Sunday morning on the Gulf Freeway and swerved his car in an alleged attempt to hit an officer who was laying down a spike strip in the road, KHOU-TV, Houston, reported Monday. The officer jumped out of the way of the vehicle and was not harmed, police said. Martinez told officers after his arrest he was not trying to strike the officer and his car swerved because he was trying to roll a joint while calling his "peeps" to tell them about his impending arrest. Martinez appeared in court Monday on charges of evading arrest and attempted intoxication assault. Prosecutors had sought an attempted murder charge, but the judge said there was not enough probable cause to support the count. Martinez has a long rap sheet that includes several drug charges and assault on a family member.
Tech Support Pits: From: Nellie Re: Voting Dear Webby, Good Luck with your test. I know you miss that cookie every two hours. Ordered ink from the site on your page. It has arrived and I am so pleased. Where do you get all your beautiful pictures? Should I vote everyday? Enjoy your Site. South, USA Nellie Dear Nellie The nurse had problems drawing blood, so she got a different nurse, who wasn't buttoned up quite so close to the chin. No problem at all after she bent low over my hand. She reminded me of a nurse in Switzerland. At one place I worked there, once a month everybody hiked a mile up to the hospital and donated blood. I had to lie down on a cot and some cute nurse came by, started the needle in my arm, and while her right boob was only an inch from my open palm, said "Squeeze!" So I did. She was a bit startled, but did not pull away, and after a few seconds even grinned. If she was here, I'd still donate a Liter of blood every month! Re the voting: It looks like they got it fixed. Yes, please vote every day! Each newsletter competes every day, and more important yet, I check the number of votes and enter them into a graph. That tells me whether I delivered what you wanted, or whether I missed. Good for you re the ink! I have used Atlantic Inkjet.com ink for about a dozen years and been quite satisfied with them. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Humor Letter, please donate what you can!
Thanks to Cookie for this one: I do have the courage, but not always the skills, to tackle any home repair project. And yes I tackle almost all of them. For example, in my garage are pieces of a lawnmower I once tried to fix. A couple of my neighbors were walking by my house, and found me in the garage attacking my vacuum cleaner with a screwdriver. "I can't get this thing to cooperate,"I explained when I saw them. Joyce suggested, "Why don't you drag it over to the other side of the garage and show it what you did to the lawnmower?"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com Give Each Child Their Own Color I have four kids in my house. To make things easier, each kid has their own color (green, blue, red, pink/yellow). we have three boys and a girl. Most things come in green, blue, red, and yellow like plates, bowls, cups, tooth brushes, etc. Our only girl likes the color pink, but most of the time I can't find pink so I get her yellow. That is why her color is pink/yellow. The main reason for the color system was when the kids were done eating dinner they all wanted dessert. The rule is "you have to finish what is on your plate to get dessert". There was always one plate that was left with food still on it, but each kid said, "That's not my plate! I ate all mine!" I never knew whose it was, but with the color system, NOW I know. These days, everything in our house comes in colors. By runningonempty1971 from Columbus, OH Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com Thriftyfun.com also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the ThriftyFun.com list, you can vote for it here:
Thanks to Bob for this: Both sides of our family turned out for my wife's college graduation. After the dean finished awarding all the diploma's, he requested, "Will all the 'cum laudes' please stand up?" My mother-in-law leaned over and whispered, "Wow! The Cum Laude family sure has a lot of kids!"
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
SINGLE BLONDE FEMALE... Seeks male companionship, ethnicity unimportant. I'm a very good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long walks in the woods, riding in your pickup truck, hunting, camping, and fishing trips, cozy winter nights lying by the fire. Candlelight dinners will have me eating out of your hand. Rub me the right way and watch me respond. I'll be at the front door when you get home from work, wearing only what nature gave me. Kiss me and I'm yours. Call 123-4567 and ask for Dixie." Over 150 men found themselves talking to the Local Humane Society, about a 4 months old Yellow Lab pup.
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