How do I stop Windows updates? 

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Good Morning,  !
Today is Monday, May 21
The Monday closest to my birthday is a Stat Holiday in Canada.
No day off for me and other self-employed people, though.
That's the benefit of being self-employed, you get to work
every day.

My raspberries are greening up nicely, and so is the Maggi
bush by the wheelie bin.

The silvey pipe you see near the left side, that is the exhaust
from the fridge & freezer. Instead of heating up the kitchen
all summer, the waste hot air produced by the fridge & freezer
goes outside. Only in winter does the hot air go into the 

The saskatoon berries finally started to bloom.
Here are the first blossoms:

Have FUN!

Today in 
0143 Earliest recorded date in America-pre Mayan king 
Harvest-Bergvorst installed 
1502 Portuguese Admiral Da Nova discovers St Helena 
1804 Lewis & Clark Expedition begins
1840 New Zealand became a British colony 
1846 1st steamship arrives in Hawaii 
1871 French regular troops attack Commune of Paris; 17,000 die 
1908 1st horror movie (Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde) premieres in Chicago
1916 Britain begins "Summer Time" (Daylight Savings Time) 
1925 Canadians allow beer sales 
1941 1st US ship sunk by a U-boat (SS Robin Moore) 
1950 Vietnamese troops of Ho Chi-Minh attack Cambodia
1956 US explodes 1st airborne hydrogen bomb over Bikini Atoll 
1964 1st nuclear-powered lighthouse (Chesapeake Bay) 
1968 US nuclear-powered sub (Scorpion), with 99 men, missing & 
is later found at the bottom of the ocean off Azores
1970 National Guard mobilized to quell disturbances at Ohio State U
1971 National Guard mobilized to quell riot in Chattanooga TN 
1982 British troops land on Falkland Islands
nothing notable happened on this day between 1982  and 2012
2012  smiled

Have FUN!

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It is good to be without vices, but it is not good to be without temptations. --- Walter Bagehot Those who agree with us may not be right, but we admire their astuteness. --- Cullen Hightower Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live. --- Mark Twain
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A nice girl brings home her fiancÚ to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells her father to find out about the young man. He invites the fiancÚ to his study for a chat. "So, what are your plans?" the father asks the fiancÚ. "I am a Biblical scholar," he replies. "A Biblical scholar. Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice home for my daughter to live in, as she's accustomed to?" "I will study," the young man replies, "and God will provide for us." "And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?" "I will concentrate on my studies, God will provide for us." "And children? How will you support children?" "Don't worry, sir, God will provide." The conversation proceeds like this, and each time the father questions, the fiancÚ insists that God will provide. Later, the mother asks, "So? How did it go?" "He has no job and no plans, but he thinks I'm God."
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Calling in sick to work makes me uncomfortable. No matter how legitimate my excuse, I always get the feeling my boss thinks I'm lying. On one recent occasion, I had a valid reason but lied anyway, because the truth was just too darned humiliating. I simply mentioned that I had sustained a head injury, and I hoped I would feel up to coming in the next day. By then, I reasoned, I could think up a doozy to explain the bandage on the top of my head. The accident occurred mainly because I had given in to my wife's wishes to adopt a cute little kitty. Initially, the new acquisition was no problem. Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen. "Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it." "You know where the button is," I protested through the shower pitter-patter and steam. "Reset it yourself!" "But I'm scared!" she persisted. "What if it starts going and sucks me in?" There was a meaningful pause and then, "C'mon, it'll only take you a second." So out I came, dripping wet and buck naked, hoping that my silent outraged nudity would make a statement about how I perceived her behavior as extremely cowardly. Sighing loudly, I squatted down and stuck my head under the sink to find the button. It is the last action I remember performing. It struck without warning, and without any respect to my circumstances. No, it wasn't the hexed disposal, drawing me into its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty, who discovered the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my legs. She had been poised around the corner and stalked me as I reached under the sink. And, at the precise moment when I was most vulnerable, she leapt at the toys I unwittingly offered and snagged them with her needle-like claws. I lost all rational thought to control orderly bodily movements, blindly rising at a violent rate of speed, with the full weight of a kitten hanging from my masculine region. Wild animals are sometimes faced with a "fight or flight" syndrome. Men, in this predicament, choose only the "flight" option. I know this from experience. I was fleeing straight up into the air when the sink and cabinet bluntly and forcefully impeded my ascent. The impact knocked me out cold. When I awoke, my wife and the paramedics stood over me. Now there are not many things in this life worse than finding oneself lying on the kitchen floor buck naked in front of a group of "been-there, done-that" paramedics. Even worse, having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics were all snorting loudly as they tried to conduct their work, all the while trying to suppress their hysterical laughter and not succeeding. Somehow I lived through it all. A few days later I finally made it back in to the office, where colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me about my head injury. I kept silent, claiming it was too painful to talk about, which it was. "What's the matter?" They all asked, "Cat got your tongue?" If they only knew!
Click on the picture for the large version Get out of the way! Grampa Has Got The Whip!
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to Jonathon Rodriguez, 28 in San Antonio, Texas Charged With Running Over Girlfriend Because She Wanted To Break Up With Him Jonathon Rodriguez, a 28-year-old Texas "man" was jailed Saturday after he allegedly ran his girlfriend down with an automobile after she broke up with him. According to police, Rodriguez became angry when his girlfriend announced that she was breaking off her relationship with him. Investigators say Rodriguez retaliated by cursing and yelling at the woman. When that didn't change her mind, he allegedly hopped into a car, punched the gas and ran her over as she walked along a sidewalk. Rodriguez showed his undying love for the woman by fleeing the scene as she lay injured. The woman was taken to a local hospital where she was treated for a broken leg and other injuries. Although the assault took place on April 7, Rodriguez remained a fugitive until his arrest Saturday. He was booked into jail and charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. His bail has been set at $80,000.
Tech Support Pits: From:Dianne RE: How do I stop Windows updates? Dear Webby How do I stop Windows updates? This weeks updates messed up more stuff than I can fix on my own. And the NOT asked for updates to my bought and paid for Microslop Office demanded, that I go rummage in the attic for the CD and serial number! I PAID for it, they have no right to hassle me about it. How can I turn off their silly updates? Dianne Dear Dianne You are not the only one, who is unhappy with the last batch of bug fixes. Replacing the old bugs with new bugs seem to have slowed down Windows, and somehow made Skype a bit fragile. Hopefully there will be a fix soon for what they did on Tuesday. The last Windows that did not need bug fixes was 3.1 Since Windows 95 there have been bug fixes. The procedure to stop them is rarely the same between one version and the next. However, usually you can try this: Start Control Panel Windows Updates In there, take off checkmarks off anything, that you think is good enough and should not be messed with. When there is a really necessary security update, there will be news about it on the net. Have FUN! DearWebby
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Woman on cell phone at mall parking lot: "Hello, psychic hotline? Where did I park my car?"
Daily tip from Use Kitty Litter Bucket for Kitchen Compost I always wanted to compost, a kitchen composter was easiest to start with but expensive. I noticed our kitty litter container (hard plastic) was a perfect size and has a lid and handle. It fits under the sink and has been working great. By krisanthemum from Pataskala, OH Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at also has a newsletter. If you want more than just one tip per day, or if you want to share your tips, then you can subscribe to it here:ThriftyFun Highly recommended! If you like the list, you can vote for it here:
France's worst air disaster occurred today when a small two-seater Cessna crashed into a cemetery early this morning. French search and rescue workers have recovered 826 bodies so far, and expect that the number will climb as the digging continues into the night. The pilot and passenger were only slightly injured and after on some minor first aid were able to help the rescuers with the digging.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. Read it on-line or subscribe. If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request.
Neville the Aborigine had been out of work for a long time, and when he was offered the job at the council as a garbage collector he decided to take it up. On his first day things were going great until he arrived at one house and noticed there was no wheelie bin out the front. Neville thought to himself, "I wanna do a good job and not get fired from here but if they find out I missed one house then I will get fired." So he went up to the door and knocked on it. To his surprise it was a fellow Aborigine who answered. Neville breathed a sigh of relief and said to the other bloke, "Where's ya bin?" The man replied, "I bin on 'olidays," Neville then said, "Na, maite, where's ya BIN?" "I bin on 'olidays I tell ya," was the reply. Neville, slightly frustrated, says, "Na, ya blimey idiot. Where's ya Wheelie Bin?" The other bloke looked round to see who might be listening. "Well," he said. "I weally bin in jail but I'm tellin' everyone I bin on 'olidays, aiy!"
╗ Soda Lime (Who Knew)

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