Good Morning,  !
Today is Saturday, October 20



Have FUN!
DearWebby

Today in 
1600 Battle of Sekigahara sets Tokugawa clan as Japan's 
  rulers (shoguns) 
1803 US Senate ratifies the Louisiana Purchase
1813 German Kingdom of Westphalia abolished
1817 1st Mississippi showboat leaves Nashville on maiden voyage
1818 49th parallel established as the border between US & Canada
1818 US & Britain agree to joint control of Oregon country 
1905 Great General Strike in Russia begins; lasts 11 days
1906 Dr Lee DeForest demonstrates his radio tube
1930 British White Paper restricts Jews from buying Arab land 
1944 30 blocks of Cleveland OH burn after a liquid gas factory explodes
1956 58ø F (15ø C), Esperanza Station, Antarctica (Antarctic record high) 
1968 Jacqueline Kennedy marries Aristotle Onassis
1973 OPEC oil embargo begins 
1983 IBM-PC DOS Version 2.1 released 
1990 3 members of 2 Live Crew acquitted on obscenity charges in Florida 
2012  smiled

Have FUN!
DearWebby



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Human beings are the only creatures that allow
their children to come back home.
--- Bill Cosby

Like its politicians and its wars, society has the
teenagers it deserves.
--- J. B. Priestley

Home computers are being called upon to perform
many new functions, including the consumption of
homework formerly eaten by the dog.
--- Doug Larson



These days, with all the emphasis on one's physical fitness, 
a new organization has sprung up called 
"Athletics Anonymous." 

When you get the urge to play golf, tennis, go power-walking 
or bicycle riding (or anything else involving a type of physical 
activity), they send someone over to watch TV with you 
until the urge passes. 



How to Place New Employees in a Proper Department
Take the prospective employees you are trying to place and
put them in a room with only a table and two chairs. Leave
them alone for two hours, without any instruction. At the
end of that time, go back and see what they are doing.

If they have taken the table apart, put them in Engineering.

If they are counting the butts in the ashtray, assign them
to Finance.

If they are waving their arms and talking out loud, send
them to Consulting.

If they are talking to the chairs, Personnel is a good spot
for them.

If they are wearing green sunglasses and need a haircut, Computer
Information Systems is their niche.

If the room has a sweaty odor, perhaps they're destined for
the Help Desk.

If they mention what a good price we got for the table and chairs, put
them into Purchasing.


If they mention that hardwood furniture DOES NOT come from rainforests,
Public Relations would suit them well.

If they are writing up the experience, send them to the Technical
Documents team.

If they don't even look up when you enter the room, assign
them to Security.

If they try to tell you it's not as bad as it looks, send
them to Marketing.

If they are sleeping, they are Management material.


Back by popular demand!
Need to lose some weight before the reuinion,
or to avoid having to buy bigger clothes?
Fat Loss Factor will do the trick easily and
quickly, without silly diets or a lot of exercise.
Huge discount if you act now!




Click on the picture for the large version

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Delicious Revolution Cookbook - Healthy Food For Busy People.
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Every Recipe Has A Gorgeous Full Color Photograph. This Is 
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Deliciously Healthy Meals For Increased Energy And 
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An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to 

Kendall Remsing, 35, in New Llano, La.

Charged With Incest After He Was Shot 
In Face By 15-Year-Old Stepdaughter

Reported by The Weekly Vice
Kendall Remsing, a 35-year-old Louisiana bonehead was jailed 
Wednesday on incest charges after he was shot in the face by 
his 15-year-old-step daughter.

According to the Vernon Parish Sheriff's Office, an 
investigation was launched in late May after police received 
a 911 call stating that a 15-year-old girl had shot her 
stepfather in the face.

Deputies who arrived on the scene took the girl into custody 
and charged her with attempted second-degree murder.

Remsing was transported to Byrd Regional Hospital where 
he was stabilized and then flown to Rapides Regional Medical 
Center where he remains in stable, but critical condition.
(Mug shot is from a previous arrest)

During the investigation, however, Remsing was now been 
accused of molesting a juvenile family member. Additional 
evidence was gathered that corroborated the allegation, 
according to detectives.

Remsing has been charged with aggravated incest and 
molestation of a juvenile. His bond has been set at $100,000.



Tech Support Pits
From: Fred
Re: Can't get rid of RealPlayer files

AS Always---HELP!!!

I downloaded some not bad, but stupid stuff to my Real PLayer---
Now I want to get rid of it.
But when I send it to the trash I get this---

Cannot delete---Make sure Disk is not full or write protected 
or not in use????

I have completely removed Real Player from My PC, but the 
files are still on my desk top---I am attaching one--- 

Thanks.
Fred

Dear Fred
Are you referring to Real Player program files, 
or to music and movies ?

To get rid of realPlayer, you have to do it through the 
Program Manager or with the Secure Uninstaller, which gets 
rid of stuff that the Program Manager can't. In case you still 
have not got the Secure Uninstaller, it is still at
http://webby.com/uninst

Nowadays you pretty well need that, because so much stuff 
is too sneaky for the Program Manager.

However, if you mean just music and movies, log on as 
Administrator and then dump them. If you were too lazy to
save the files into a folder made for that purpose, and just 
littered them onto the desktop, then quite possibly they are
"OWNED" by the Administrator, and can't be deleted by a
mere User. 

If you have trouble logging on as administrator, save all openfiles,
close all open programs, Hit SMD (Save My Desktop) and then 
rudely pull the plug.

After plugging in again, Windows will ask you, if you want to
start up in Safe Mode. In Safe Mode you are automatically the 
Administrator. As Administrator you can delete anything you want.

Keep in mind that Safe Mode quite likely messes up your icon
arrangement. That is why it is important to hit SMD before you 
do that.

In some cases, uninstalling a program like RealPlayer with the
Program Manager or Secure Uninstaller
does not unlock the data files until you reboot. 
Real reboot, not just restart.

Have FUN!
DearWebby



If you can help with the  cost of the

Humor Letter, please donate what you can!




Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com
Use an Empty Can as a Utensil Holder When Cooking: 

Here is what I use to prevent spilled mess on my counter when 
I am cooking. I usually use more than one utensil when I am 
cooking but never know where to place them during the cooking 
time as I am still using them. Well, since I usually use some type 
of canned goods with all my meals, I came up with the 
following idea.

I rinse the can that I used, then I use it as a utensil holder while 
I am cooking. Once I am done cooking, I place the utensils in 
the sink, rinse the can again and recycle it. So it's kinda like 
recycling it twice. The bonus is that it saves a mess to clean 
off my counter or a plate.

By tomnsaby from Albuquerque, NM 

Cans are too light and get knocked over too easily, plus they 
don't have space for ladles and flippers. I use a heavy Pyrex
1 liter measuring cup half full of water.  Even with an 
assortment of wooden spoons and ladles it never gets knocked
over.

The water adds weight and keeps food from hardening on the
utensils.

Have FUN!
DearWebby

Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com

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5 Steps To Looking 10 Years Younger
This is mostly a "Don't fall for this and that stuff,
that you won't keep up anyway."
These 5 steps reveal the things you absolutey 
MUST AVOID if you want to slow the aging process, 
reclaim your health, and achieve your ideal body.
Give "Old School - New Body" a try!



The fourth-grade class was studying the development of
the auto industry. The teacher had emphasized the role
played by Henry Ford, whose assembly lines decreased
production costs. At the end of the unit, she gave a
test including the question: "What did Henry Ford invent
that made buying a car more affordable?"

One of the brightest students in the class wrote:
"0% financing."




Ophelia Dingbatter's News


No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups. 
Read it on-line or subscribe. 
If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request. 


On a recent radio station appearance, "Uncle" Larry Reeb
was asked, "Are you a college man?"

He replied, "Nope.  I stayed HOME and got drunk at home.  
I couldn't afford that $20,000 cover charge."

» Stary Critters