Wednesday, November 28, 2012, 12:18 PM
Posted by Administrator
Good Morning, !
Today is Wednesday, November 28
The internet works in mysterious ways.
Natalie, my friend and senior tech lives in Kharkiv, Ukraine.
Today a big high pressure hot water pipe for the municipal
central heating broke half a block away from her.
Somebody took some video of that and uploaded it to YouTube.
From Ukraine, Europe, to California, North America.
No big deal.
Then a Ukrainian TV station copied the movie off YouTube and
showed it all across Ukraine. California to Ukraine.
Natalie's father in Kyiev saw that and skyped her about it.
Natalie asked sone friends on FaceBook about details
Ukraine to California
They found the YouTube URL for her.
California to Ukraine.
She recognized the building half a block away, and finally
knew why her radiators had gone cold.
Have FUN!
DearWebby
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Household tasks are easier and quicker when they are done
by somebody else.
--- James Thorpe (1888 - 1953)
The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that
carries any reward.
--- John Maynard Keynes (1883 - 1946)
>From Richi
A women’s lib speaker was addressing a large group and said,
“Where would man be today if it were not for woman?”
She paused a moment and looked around the room.
“I repeat, where would man be today if it were not for woman?”
From the back of the room came a voice,
“He’d be in the Garden of Eden eating strawberries
and hogging the computer.”
WHAT IS A CAT?
1. Cats do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They're totally unpredictable.
4. They whine when they are not happy.
5. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
6. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7. They expect you to cater to their every whim.
8. They're moody.
9. They leave hair everywhere.
10. They drive you nuts and cost an arm and a leg.
Conclusion: They're tiny women in little fur coats.
WHAT IS A DOG?
1. Dogs lie around all day, sprawled on the most
comfortable piece of furniture in the house.
2. They can hear a package of food opening half a block
away, but don't hear you when you're in the same room.
3. They can look dumb and lovable all at the same time.
4. They growl when they are not happy.
5. When you want to play, they want to play.
6. When you want to be alone, they go to sleep.
7. They are great at begging.
8. They will love you forever if you rub their tummies.
9. They leave their toys everywhere.
10. They do disgusting things with their mouths and then
try to give you a kiss.
Conclusion: They're tiny men in little fur coats.
Number 1 Site For Background Checks: 360
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Click on the picture for the large version
Messy sniper,
but the shoes are shiny!
If you like the Dear Webby Daily Humor Letter,
please vote for it at the Ezine Finder:
Thanks for your votes!
An INTERNATIONAL BONEHEAD AWARD to
Arteesha Donaldson, 24, Rock Hill, SC
Missing Sex Toy Triggered Domestic Assault
Reported by The Smoking Gun
A Thanksgiving Day argument over a misplaced sex toy
escalated into an ironing board assault of a South Carolina
woman by her live-in girlfriend, cops report.
According to a police report, officers Thursday afternoon
went to the Rock Hill apartment shared by Arteesha Donaldson,
24, and Latoya Hudson, 28, in response to a domestic dispute
report.
Hudson told cops that Donaldson “began looking for her
detachable latex penis” and became upset at her when she
could not find the item. “Hudson states the two argued for
several minutes, when Donaldson threw an ironing board at
Hudson,” police reported.
At that point, Donaldson’s brother allegedly joined the fray,
which left Hudson with a sore head (though she declined
medical attention). While Donaldson, pictured above, admitted
engaging in “mutual combat” with her girlfriend, she denied
throwing the ironing board at Hudson and said her brother
only tried to break up the fight.
Donaldson, who had an active warrant in a neighboring county,
was arrested for misdemeanor assault and battery.
The Rock Hill Police Department report offers no further
information on the whereabouts of Donaldson’s detachable
latex penis or damage to the ironing board.
Tech Support Pits
From: Jacqi
Re: Fingerprint recognition keypads
Dear Webby
You're a down to earth type – I just wondered what your
opinion would be of the latest security device my employers
are in the office.
In order to enter the offices (not the building but just by
the elevators) there is a fingerprint recognition device.
It hasn't been formally introduced so I don't know all the
details, but am I being a stick in the mud for objecting
to this?
No I don't work in a government office with sensitive info.
Nor do I work for a company that prints money or bonds.
It's just the finance offices for a hire company, and no,
there is no money on the premises (apart from what's in
my purse etc)
I would appreciate your feed back before I start really
complaining.
thanks a lot
Jacqui
Dear Jacqui
Don't complain! That would make you as moronic a bonehead
as that Mexican, who objects to RFID cards in Texas schools.
That Fingerprint recognition keypad is NOT connected to the
cops or Interpol or anybody, and does not even talk the same
language..
That keypad has a brain like a pocket calculator. It stores
100 to 250 points of your thumb, just enough to recognize it.
When it does recognize it, it unlocks the door. If you got a
band aid on your thumb, then it plays stupid and makes
you punch in your number.
If your door entry system is connected to payroll or a printer
or has the ability to download the data to a computer, that
will continue to work the same as it always has.
The only difference will be one letter indicating whether
you used the keypad or the fingerprint recognition.
For example:
09:07 0069 0001 F
Time Employee# Entrance# Mode
In plain English that means:
At 7 minutes past 9 am employee #69 entered at door #1
and used the Fingerprint recognition mode.
That's all. Nothing about your bra size or weight or naughty
habits.
If your Mode is K too often, they will get you to re-scan
your thumb or figure out why you use the inconvenient
key mode.
Just like an RFID belt button or card or lanyard, your thumb
does not store private infomation like bra size or weight.
It simply identifies you without making a big hassle about it.
Door entry systems use a totally different method to look
at fingerprints from what the cops use. They don't even talk
the same language. The cops would not know what to do
with the internal data of the fingerprint reader, even if could
be extracted. The entry system just delivers a long strip with
data like in that example.
If you use time cards, like the old-fashioned cardboard
cards, that you take from the right, stick into the clock for
stamping and unlocking the door, and then put it into your
slot on the left, it does the same thing, except it shows to
anybody and everybody that your card is either on the OUT
or the IN rack, and usually the cards also have info for
people to make wake-up calls.
The fingerprint or the RFID system does exactly the same,
just offering you more privacy and conveninece.
I used to install RFID entry systems in the 80's and 90's.
There is absolutely no privacy concern with those or
fingerprint recognition entry systems.
The same applies to keyboards that have a fingerprint reader.
You assign your passwrd to your fingerprint. The fingerprint
data inside your keyboard would be totally useless to cops, since
they use a different system. They would get your fingerprints
from your coffee cup, if they need them.
Have FUN!
DearWebby
If you can help with the cost of the
Humor Letter, please donate what you can! |
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Judi was talking to Monika one morning about a recent
NASA new article.
Judi said, "I can see how astronomers figure out the distance
of stars and their size and temperatures and all that. But
there's one thing I can't figure out."
"What's that?" Monika asked.
"How do they find out what the stars' names are?"
Daily tip from Thriftyfun.com
Take Bulbs to Approved Disposal Center
When it comes to disposal and/or cleanup of CFL light bulbs,
the most important and thorough information comes from the
Environmental Protection Agency.
Proper end result disposal is not going out with your regular
trash, but rather taken to an approved disposal center.
Most Home Depot stores will take them for proper disposal
even if your city or county offers the same service.
By Deeli from Richland, WA
Theoretically ALL dead fluorescent lights should be brought
to approved disposal centers, along with baby thermometers.
Old-fashioned NorthAmerican made lightbulbs can be disposed
of in any way you feel like.
Have FUN!
DearWebby
Check out ThriftyFun's Blog at http://www.myfrugallife.com
Please Vote at the Ezine Finder: 
Thanks for your votes!
Register and set your favorites, so that you can conveniently
vote for each of the newsletters, that deserve your vote all in
one place, without having to go there separately for each.
Mrs. Goldberg was shopping at a produce stand in her
neighborhood. She approached the vendor and asked,
"How much are these oranges?"
"Two for a quarter," answered the vendor.
"How much is just one?" she asked.
"Fifteen cents," answered the vendor.
"Then I'll take the other one," said Mrs. Goldberg.
Ophelia Dingbatter's News
No sermon and not suitable for church, just jokes and fun for grownups.
Read it on-line or subscribe.
If you subscribe, look for the double-opt-in confirmation request. |
A woman visited a psychic in the local village. In a dark and
gloomy room, gazing at the Tarot cards laid out before her, the
Tarot reader asked her if the initial of her first name was "H".
When the woman confirmed, that it was indeed so, the psychic
delivered the bad news; "There is no easy way to
say this so I'll just be blunt, prepare yourself to be a widow.
Your husband Bill will die a violent and horrible death this year."
Visibly shaken, the woman stared at the psychic's lined face,
then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. She
took a few deep breaths to compose herself. She simply had to
know. She met the Tarot reader's gaze, steadied her voice, and
asked: "Will I get away with it?
Today in
1520 Ferdinand Magellan begins crossing Pacific Ocean
1795 US pays $800,000 & a frigate as ransom to Algiers & Tunis
1871 Ku Klux Klan trials began in Federal District Court in SC
1895 America's 1st auto race starts; 6 cars, 55 miles,
winner averages 7 MPH
1922 Capt Cyril Turner (RAF) gave 1st skywriting exhibition (NYC).
Turner spelled out "Hello USA. Call Vanderbilt 7200."
47,000 called
1929 Adm Richard E Byrd makes 1st South Pole flight
1942 Nearly 500 die in a fire that destroyed Coconut Grove
nightclub in Boston MA
1943 FDR, Churchill & Stalin met at Tehran to map out strategy
1964 Mariner 4 launched; 1st probe to fly by Mars
1979 Air New Zealand DC-10 crashes in Antarctica killing 257
1988 Picasso's "Acrobat & Harlequin" sells for $38.46 million
2012 smiled
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